{"id":3730,"date":"2013-07-13T01:50:46","date_gmt":"2013-07-13T01:50:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/localhost\/?p=3730"},"modified":"2013-07-13T01:50:46","modified_gmt":"2013-07-13T01:50:46","slug":"21-love-and-relationships-in-yoga-vol-04-fourth-series-1951","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/01-works-of-sri-aurobindo\/02-other-editions\/letters-of-sri-aurobindo\/04-fourth-series-1951\/21-love-and-relationships-in-yoga-vol-04-fourth-series-1951","title":{"rendered":"-21_LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS IN YOGA.htm"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\n
\n

\nSECTION SEVENTEEN<\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nLOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS IN YOGA  <\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/p>\n

\nBhakti and Love in Yoga<\/i><\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nTHE nature of Bhakti is adoration, worship,
\nself-offering to what is greater than oneself;  the nature of love is a
\nfeeling or a seeking for closeness and union. Self-giving is the character of both;  both are necessary in the Yoga and each gets its
\nfull force when supported by the other.<\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nSpiritual and Psychic Love<\/a><\/i><\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nTHE love that belongs to the spiritual planes is of a
\ndifferent kind\u2014the psychic has its own more personal love, bhakti, surrender.
\nLove in the higher or spiritual mind is more universal and impersonal.
\nThe two must go together to make the highest
\ndivine love.<\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\n27-6-1936 <\/font><\/p>\n

\nPage-589 <\/font><\/p>\n

\n

\nUniversal and Psychic Love<\/a><\/i><\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nUNIVERSAL love is always universal\u2014psychic
\n<\/b>love <\/b>can individualise itself.<\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\n24-5-1936 <\/font><\/p>\n

\nWrong Use <\/b> of Universal Love<\/a><\/i><\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nTHAT was exactly what X tried to do\u2014to express
\nthe love in connection with this or that person.
\nBut universal love is not personal\u2014it has to be
\nheld within as a condition of the consciousness
\nwhich will have its effects according to the Divine
\nWill or be used by that Will if necessary; but to
\nrun about expressing it for one’s personal satisfaction or the satisfaction of others is only to spoil
\nand lose it.<\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\n5-6-1936 <\/font><\/p>\n

\nThe Only Way to Love Divinely<\/a><\/i><\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nONE can love divinely only by becoming divine
\nin nature; there is no other way. <\/font><\/p>\n

\nPage-590 <\/font><\/p>\n

\n

\nTrue Relation with the Divine<\/a><\/i><\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nTHE relation with the Divine, the relation with the
\nMother must be one of love, faith, trust, confidence, surrender; any other relation of the vital ordinary kind brings reactions contrary to the
\nsadhana,\u2014desire, egoistic abhimān,<\/i> demand, revolt
\nand all the disturbance of ignorant rajasic human
\nnature from which it is the object of the sadhana
\nto escape.<\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\n26-4-1933 <\/font><\/p>\n

\n
\nTrue Psychic Relation with the Mother<\/a><\/i><\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nWHAT you write here is an exact description of the
\npsychic being and its relation to the Mother. That
\nis the true relation. If you want to succeed in this
\nYoga, you must take your stand on the psychic
\nrelation and reject the egoistic vital movement.
\nThe psychic being coming to the front and staying
\nthere is the decisive movement in the Yoga. It is
\nthat which happened when you saw the Mother
\nlast, the psychic came in front. But you must keep
\nit in front. You will not be able to do that if you
\nlisten to the vital ego and its outcries. It is by faith <\/font><\/p>\n

\nPage-591 <\/font><\/p>\n

\n

\nand surrender and the joy of pure self-giving\u2014
\nthe psychic attitude\u2014that one grows into the
\nTruth and becomes united with the Divine.<\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\n26-2-1933 <\/font><\/p>\n

\n
\nPsychic and Vital Love for the Mother<\/a><\/i><\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nLOVE and devotion depend on the opening of the
\npsychic and for that the desires must go. The vital
\nlove offered by many to the Mother instead of
\nthe psychic love brings more disturbance than
\nanything else because it is coupled with desire.<\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\n8-9-1936 <\/font><\/p>\n

\nPure Vital Love for the Mother<\/a><\/i><\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nTHERE is no harm in the vital love provided it
\nis purified of all insincerity (as, for example, self-importance etc.) and from all demand. To feel joy
\nin seeing the Mother is all right, but to demand it
\nas a right, to be upset or in revolt or abhimān<\/i> when
\nit is not given, to be jealous of others who get it\u2014
\nall that is demand and creates an impurity which
\nspoils both the joy and the love.<\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\n13-9-1934 <\/font><\/p>\n

\nPage-592 <\/font><\/p>\n

\n

\n
\nLove of the Divine and Other Attachments<\/a><\/i><\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nIT is as the love of the Divine grows that the other
\nthings cease to trouble the mind.<\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\n
\nTurning to the Divine and Withdrawal
\nfrom Old Relations<\/a><\/i><\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nTHE inner being turned to the Divine naturally
\ndraws away from old vital relations and outer
\nmovements and contacts till it can bring a new
\nconsciousness into the external being. <\/font><\/p>\n

\n

\nSeptember 1933 <\/font><\/p>\n

\nPlace of Human Love in Yoga<\/a><\/i> <\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/p>\n

\n

\nTHESE movements are part of man’s ignorant vital
\nnature. The love which human beings feel for one
\nanother is also usually an egoistic vital love and
\nthese other movements, claim, demand, jealousy,
\nabhimān,<\/i> anger, etc., are its common accompaniments. There is no place for them in Yoga\u2014nor in <\/font><\/p>\n

\nPage-593 <\/font><\/p>\n

\n

\ntrue love, psychic or divine. In Yoga all love should
\nbe turned towards the Divine and to human or
\nother beings only as Vessels of the Divine\u2014abhimān
\n<\/i>and the rest should have no place in it.<\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\n3-8-1933 <\/font><\/p>\n

\n
\nRelations with <\/b> Others in <\/b>Sadhana<\/a><\/i><\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nIT cannot be said that these affinities are either bad
\nor good in a general way. It depends on the person, the effects and many other things. As a general rule,
\nall these affinities have to be surrendered to the
\nDivine along with the rest of the old nature, so
\nthat only what is in harmony with the Divine Truth can be kept and transformed for its work in you.
\nAll relations with Others must be relations <\/b> in the
\nDivine and not of the old personal nature.<\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\n1933 <\/font><\/p>\n

\nPage-594 <\/font><\/p>\n

\n

\n
\nThe Rule about Personal Relations in Yoga<\/a><\/i><\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nA PERSONAL relation is formed when there is an
\nexclusive mutual looking to each other. The rule  about personal relations in this Yoga is this: (1) All
\npersonal relations to disappear in the single relation
\nbetween the sadhak and the Divine: (2) All personal
\n(psychic-spiritual) relations to proceed from the
\nDivine Mother, determined by her, and to be part
\nof the single relation with the Divine Mother. In
\nso far as it keeps to this double rule and admits
\nno physical indulgence or vital deformation or
\nmixture, a personal relation can be there. But since
\nas yet the Supramental has not taken possession but
\nis only descending and there is still struggle in the
\nvital and physical levels, there must be a great
\ncarefulness such as would not be necessary if the
\nsupramental transformation were already there.
\nBoth have to be in direct relation with the Mother
\nand in a total dependence on her and to see that
\nthat remains and that nothing diminishes its totality
\nor cuts across it in the least degree.<\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\n
\nYogic Relations between Sadhaks and Sadhikas<\/a><\/i><\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nIN a general way the only method for succeeding in
\nhaving between a man and a woman the free and
\nnatural yogic relations that should exist between a
\nsadhak and a sadhika in this Yoga is to be able <\/font><\/p>\n

\nPage-595 <\/font><\/p>\n

\n

\nto meet each other without thinking at all that
\none is a man and another a woman\u2014both are simply
\nhuman beings, both sadhaks, both striving to serve
\nthe Divine and seeking the Divine alone and none else. Have that fully in
\nyourself and no difficulty is
\nlikely to come.<\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nRemoval <\/b> of Vital Attachments<\/a><\/i><\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nIT is by the force of the white light in the vital
\nconsciousness bringing an exclusive consecration
\nthat these attachments can disappear.<\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\n10-1-1934 <\/font><\/p>\n

\nTrue Love and Jealousy<\/a><\/i><\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nI AM glad to see that the right consciousness is
\nreturning and the attack is over. As it is past, I need
\nnot say anything about what you wrote in the interval
\nsince you can with the sight of the true consciousness
\nsee for yourself what is the right answer. <\/font><\/p>\n

\nOnly one thing I must note so that no wrong  idea may linger in your understanding. You seem<\/font><\/p>\n

\nPage-596 <\/font><\/p>\n

\n

\nto say in one passage of a letter that the Mother
\nhad said to you that jealousy is inevitable in true love in ordinary life, and
\nif it is not there when
\none sees the other loving elsewhere, then they don’t love each other! You must
\nhave strangely misheard and misunderstood the Mother. It is just the
\nopposite of what the Mother has always said and
\nthought and the very contrary of all her knowledge
\nand experience. It is the idea of the ordinary mind
\nabout jealousy and love, not hers. She remembers
\nvery well having told you just the opposite that,
\neven in ordinary life, one is not<\/i> jealous if one has
\nthe true love. Jealousy is the common movement
\nof the human egoistic lower vital with its grasping
\npossessive instinct and it cannot be anything else.
\nI thought it better to make this clear so that there might be no misleading
\nimpression that such movements of the lower vital nature have any sanction or
\nsupport in the truth of the soul; they belong to the
\nvital Ignorance, they are fruits of the vital ego.<\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\n1-2-1933 <\/font><\/p>\n

\nPage-597 <\/font><\/p>\n

\n

\nRejection of Jealousy<\/a><\/i><\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\nIT is of course the old reaction\u2014jealousy is certainly there, or you would not feel this violent sorrow.
\nThat it subsists still in the recesses and rises with
\nsuch vehemence shows how deeply rooted this
\nmovement was in your physical consciousness. You
\nhave not been able to root it out because when it
\ncomes you associate yourself entirely with it and
\nabandon yourself to its outcries and violence. You
\nmust have the strength to stand back from it in
\nthat part of your nature which is free\u2014only then
\nwill you be able to push it away from you; and it
\nis only if it is pushed away from you each time it
\nrises that it will consent to disappear and return
\nno more. As for our support and help it is there,
\nbut you must remain conscious of it\u2014and you
\nmust not allow any wrong ideas like those of this
\nmorning to diminish the sense of unity and contact
\nwith the Mother.<\/font><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/p>\n

\n26-3-1933<\/font><\/p>\n

\nPage-598<\/font> <\/font><\/p>\n

\t\t<\/font><\/b><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/table>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

SECTION SEVENTEEN   LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS IN YOGA     Bhakti and Love in Yoga   THE nature of Bhakti is adoration, worship, self-offering to…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[97],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3730","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-04-fourth-series-1951","wpcat-97-id"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3730","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3730"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3730\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3730"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3730"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3730"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}