{"id":4075,"date":"2013-07-13T01:53:15","date_gmt":"2013-07-13T01:53:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/localhost\/?p=4075"},"modified":"2013-07-13T01:53:15","modified_gmt":"2013-07-13T01:53:15","slug":"54-opnions-of-others-vol-14-words-of-the-mother-volume-14","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/02-works-of-the-mother\/01-cwmce\/14-words-of-the-mother-volume-14\/54-opnions-of-others-vol-14-words-of-the-mother-volume-14","title":{"rendered":"-54_Opnions-of-Others.htm"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\n
\n
\n


\nOpinions of Others <\/span>
\n<\/font> <\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You are quite right in not allowing the moods and fancies of people to
\neffect you. You must soar above all that in the constant feeling of the
\nDivine’s Presence, Love and Protection. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Don’t let anything from outside approach and disturb you. What people
\nthink, do or say is of little importance. The only thing that counts is your
\nrelation with the Divine. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>30 April 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

It is always regrettable when one is open to the influence of another
\nperson. One shouldn’t admit any influence except that of the Divine. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>22 March 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

To feel hurt by what others do or think or say is always a sign of
\nweakness and proof that the whole being is not exclusively turned towards the
\nDivine, not under the divine influence alone. And then, instead of bringing
\nwith oneself the divine atmosphere made of love, tolerance, understanding,
\npatience, it is one’s ego that throws itself out, in response to another’s ego,
\nwith stiffness and hurt feelings, and the disharmony is aggravated. The ego
\nnever understands that the Divine has different workings in different people
\nand that to judge things from one’s own egoistic point of view is a great
\nmistake bound to increase the confusion. What we do with passion and
\nintolerance cannot be divine, because the Divine works only in peace and
\nharmony. <\/span> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage − 299<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

You are distressed because instead of listening to the voice of your
\nsoul, you have accepted the suggestions of vulgar minds and obscure
\nconsciousnesses who see ugliness and impurity everywhere because they are not
\nin contact with the psychic purity. <\/span><\/p>\n

Refuse to listen to these wrong suggestions, turn deliberately to the
\nDivine and rekindle your faith in His Supreme Guidance. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The vital of some people calls always for confusion and disharmony,
\npetty quarrels and confusion; they generally have also a kind of mania of
\nperfection and believe that everybody is against them. To cure that is most
\ndifficult and requires a radical transformation of the nature. <\/span><\/p>\n

The best when dealing with them is not
\nto mind <\/i>the reactions and go on doing what one has to do with simplicity
\nand sincerity. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Do not worry about the reactions of people, however unpleasant they may
\nbe − the vital is everywhere and in everybody full of impurities and the
\nphysical full of unconsciousness. These two imperfections have to be cured,
\nhowever long it may take, and we have only to work at it patiently and
\ncourageously. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Who has told you that your nature is inferior to X’s? Each one has his
\nown nature and follows his own path, and comparisons with others are always
\nuseless and most often dangerous. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 April 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage − 300<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Timidity is a form of vanity. When you are timid, it means that you
\nattach much more importance to the opinion others have of you than to the
\nsincerity of your action. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is not necessary to attach any importance to the opinions of people
\nbecause they are the passing results of passing impressions; other times and
\nnew impressions will easily change them. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

He who is faultless does not care for the opinion of others. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Why should he listen to threats? He must act according to the\u00a0 <\/span>inner command
\n<\/i>and not according to public opinion. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

When you give yourself to the accomplishment of an unselfish aim, never
\nexpect ordinary people to praise and support you− on the contrary, they
\nwill always fight against you, hate and curse you.<\/span><\/p>\n

But the Divine will be with you. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>17 September
\n1953<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

To be plastic towards the Divine means not to oppose Him with the
\nrigidity of preconceived ideas and fixed principles. And this requires a great
\nstrength, for the more you are plastic to the divine will, the more you come in
\nconflict with the human wills that are not in contact with the divine will. <\/span> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 301<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Give your will entirely to the Divine and
\nit will feel free from the imposition of any human will. <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n


\n\u00a0<\/span><\/i>19 September 1953<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Even if you were the only person in the whole world to give himself
\nentirely and in all purity to the Divine − and thus being alone,
\nmisunderstood naturally by everyone upon earth \u2014 even if it were so, there is
\nno reason why you should not do it. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I am shocked to hear that X has complained
\nto you against me. I have been specially kind to her. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

This is exactly
\nthe kind of treatment the Divine received from the world. Even Sri Aurobindo<\/span> was not spared. So you see that you are in good
\ncompany and there is no reason to despair! <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Do not do your own will, but the Divine’s will. <\/span><\/p>\n

Do not either do other people’s will, for you will be torn apart. <\/span>\u00a0<\/span>1972 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n <\/span>Page \u2014 302<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n


\n
\nAttachment to Others <\/font> <\/a> <\/span> <\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

All that is based on human relationship is unstable and transient, mixed
\nand unsatisfactory; it is only what is established in the Divine and through
\nthe Divine that can last and give satisfaction. <\/span><\/p>\n

21 July 1935<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

I am sure that in the conscious part of your being your relationship
\nwith X is what you say it is. But one must always be wary of the subconscious
\nand that is why it is always preferable to have no [ \u2026 ] friendships and
\nintimacies, because in the subconscious vital, ties are established which form
\nan obstacle to the sadhana<\/span>. <\/span><\/p>\n

My dear child, my blessings are with you. <\/span> <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

A friendship free from desire and attachment might be the ideal
\nsolution, but to be carried out it requires a perfect mastery over oneself and
\nan unshakable discipline of the vital and the body. And as for the moment it is
\nnot yet the case, it is wiser not to tempt the devil and to cut all relations. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

There was a time when you were very passionate and your affections
\ndegenerated immediately into passions with all the disequilibrium that this
\nentails. <\/span><\/p>\n

But now you are more sober and undoubtedly you are more calm and quiet,
\nuntil the day there will be no attachments any longer but luminous and sweet
\nsympathies without any demand or egoism.  <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage − 303<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

All depends upon the kind of attraction. <\/span><\/p>\n

If it is a physical attraction, the need, the instinct of the animal
\npushing it to reproduction, the best thing is that you leave the place and not
\nsee X again. For this would mean that this person’s influence awakens and
\nencourages the lower instincts. <\/span><\/p>\n

If it is a vital attraction you can try to purify and control it, by
\navoiding a too close intimacy and cutting down your relation to what is
\nindispensable when living in the same house. <\/span><\/p>\n

If it is a sentimental and emotional attraction, it is easier to channelise<\/span> and turn it to the Divine by confining your
\nrelations to a common seeking for the Divine and the spiritual life. <\/span><\/p>\n

Then all will depend on your sincerity and reciprocal goodwill. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span> <\/span><\/p>\n

I very much appreciate your frankness and your sincerity. It is true
\nthat it is extremely difficult to keep free from vital mixture any close
\nrelation with human beings. But the remedy is not to cut all such relations,
\nbut to be constantly vigilant (on one’s guard) and not to allow the vital
\nattractiveness to rule one’s actions. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>29 August 1950 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Keep yourself free from all human attachment and you will be happy. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>6 June 1954 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Remembrance is a dangerous ally of attachment. <\/span> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 304<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

For the time being, it is better to keep quiet and concentrate on your
\ninner development. Later, when you feel free from every trace of attachment,
\nyou will be able to resume your correspondence spontaneously and without difficulty;
\nit will then be useful and profitable. But the rule is always to realise<\/span> yourself what you wish to give to others. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>17 April 1956 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Take advantage of the circumstances to get rid of all attachment to the
\nmembers of your family. <\/span><\/p>\n

You must learn that you have no more brothers, sister, father, mother,
\nexcept Sri Aurobindo<\/span> and myself, and you must feel
\nfree and unconcerned whatever happens to them. We are your whole family, your
\nprotection, your all in all.<\/span> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage − 305<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

  <\/font><\/span><\/span><\/b><\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/table>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Opinions of Others   You are quite right in not allowing the moods and fancies of people to effect you. You must soar above all…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[116],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4075","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-14-words-of-the-mother-volume-14","wpcat-116-id"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4075","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4075"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4075\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4075"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4075"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4075"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}