{"id":4243,"date":"2013-07-13T01:54:30","date_gmt":"2013-07-13T01:54:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/localhost\/?p=4243"},"modified":"2013-07-13T01:54:30","modified_gmt":"2013-07-13T01:54:30","slug":"01-series-one-1932-1949-vol-17-more-answers-from-the-mother-volume-17","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/02-works-of-the-mother\/01-cwmce\/17-more-answers-from-the-mother-volume-17\/01-series-one-1932-1949-vol-17-more-answers-from-the-mother-volume-17","title":{"rendered":"-01_Series One (1932-1949).htm"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n\n\n
\n


\nSERIES ONE<\/font>
\n(1932-1949)<\/font><\/span><\/i><\/span><\/b> <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

To a young disciple who joined the Sri
\nAurobindo Ashram in 1930 at the age of thirteen. After eight\u00a0 <\/span>years of study he took up work, first on\u00a0 <\/span>he construction of Golconde (an Ashram residential
\nquarters) as a carpentry supervisor and then in the Granary and Dining Room. In
\n1945 he became a teacher in the newly-opened Ashram school and presently works
\nin the Reception Service. The disciple started writing to the Mother at the age
\nof fifteen.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

When I sleep at <\/span><\/i>noon<\/span><\/i> I am not conscious; if
\nthere is any noise I don\u2019t hear it. But at night when I sleep, I am sometimes
\nconscious and can hear nearly everything. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>Is it all right not to
\nsleep at night? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

No, it is not all right not to sleep. It
\nis necessary to sleep very quietly and well. Besides, this does not prevent
\nyou, when you dream, from being conscious of your dreams. What is it that
\nprevents you from sleeping? <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>You
\nmust tell me everything very sincerely and without fear. Telling me everything
\nvery frankly brings you closer to me. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>8 December 1932 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Mother, I don\u2019t know the significance of animals.\u00b9 For example,
\nthe lion\u2026<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Power.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

the deer\u2026<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00b9The disciple enquired about this because the
\nMother was sending him pictures of animals pasted on the front of the envelopes
\ncontaining her replies to him.<\/font><\/span> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 3<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Swiftness of movement. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

the swan\u2026<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The soul. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

birds\u2026<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Some birds have a meaning, but it is not
\none and the same for all birds. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 December 1932 <\/span> <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I want to know the significance of the elephant whose picture you
\nsent me today, and also of the parrot. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The parrot signifies \u201cfluency of speech\u201d
\nand the elephant \u201cstrength\u201d. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>25 December 1932<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

The dog on the envelope means: obedience. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>31 December 1932<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

What is the significance of the picture you sent me this morning? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is a seal \u2014 a very clever animal that
\ncan be taught all sorts of tricks, even juggling. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>3 January 1933<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

What does the peacock signify?<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 4<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Victory. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>5 January 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

 What is the significance of the picture of the rabbit you sent me
\ntoday? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is not a rabbit, it is a hare <\/i>and the hare means \u201cprudence\u201d. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>6 January 1933<\/span><\/i>  <\/span><\/p>\n

Now I understand everything. I will never make the same mistake
\nagain. I am very sad about this. Now I will be calm and try not to do anything
\nyou do not like. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

That is good, my child; I trust you and I
\nknow that you will never deliberately do anything I do not like. So you must
\nnot be sad nor dwell on the past, but think only of the joy of not making any
\nmore mistakes on this point in the future. <\/span><\/p>\n

And you may be sure that
\nmy affection will always be with you to help you to do the right thing. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 January 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

I think that what I wrote yesterday was not good. Now I regret
\nwhat I wrote. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You must not regret. It is always better
\nto be frank and open; that is the best way to correct one\u2019s mistakes. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 January 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>X tells me that she won\u2019t make any shirts for me, only Punjabis.
\nThen, after a lot of quarrelling, she tells me <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/i>Page
\n– 5<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

that she will make one Punjabi and one shirt, but I want two
\ncoloured shirts. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You were quite wrong to quarrel. I
\ncompletely disapprove of this behaviour. You are still a child and ought to
\nrespect your elders. Besides, it is the worst possible way to get something
\nfrom someone. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>You
\nsay, \u201cI want <\/i>shirts\u201d; that is not the
\nway to speak. By what right does a desire or preference dare to impose itself
\nin this way? <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>After
\nenquiring I shall tell you what can be done. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>5 February 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>I didn\u2019t quarrel with X. I didn\u2019t answer her questions and I don\u2019t
\nknow enough French to quarrel with her. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If you didn\u2019t quarrel, it is all right. To
\nquarrel <\/i>means to say unpleasant
\nthings to each other with violence. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>6 February 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

The reindeer on the envelope is the symbol
\nof endurance. <\/span><\/p>\n

15 February 1933<\/span><\/i>  <\/span><\/p>\n

(About a picture of a dove)<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I am sending you the bird of your name:
\nPeace. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>16 February 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

The cat means receptivity. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>21 February 1933<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t <\/span>Page
\n\t\t\t– 6<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

\u00a0<\/span>The pelican on the envelope is the symbol
\nof devotedness. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>25 February 1933<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

I shall oppose the vital, I shall fight with it, I shall win the
\nvictory. One day I shall win the victory over all the dark forces. The Divine
\nGrace is there why should I fear? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, you should not fear, you should keep
\nan entire faith in the Divine Grace. The second point is to keep your body
\nwell-balanced by getting enough sleep \u2014 seven hours out of twenty-four \u2014<\/span> <\/span>and
\nenough food. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>2 March 1933<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Yesterday at <\/span><\/i>noon<\/span><\/i> I was reading a book
\nand after a while I fell asleep. I awoke with a start and looked at the time:
\nit was almost <\/span><\/i>one o\u2019clock<\/span><\/i>. I had a class at <\/span><\/i>one o\u2019clock<\/span><\/i>. So I was able to go. Was it the Divine who woke me up? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Not necessarily. One part of the
\nsubconscient is always alert, and having the will to wake up at a certain time
\nis enough for that part to wake you. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>3 March 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>How can one change the obscure vital into a luminous vital? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

By the surrender of the vital, its opening
\nto the light, and the growth of consciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 March 1933 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span>Page
\n\u2014 7<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Last night, I got the idea that I would try to observe absolute
\nsilence, not even laughing or thinking. Thinking only of the Mother. Praying to
\nthe Divine. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Not laughing or thinking, that is going a
\nbit too far!<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I said to myself: But why not observe silence all day? I shall try
\nto do so. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

That is a bit too much. Control over one\u2019s
\nspeech is more important than complete silence. The best thing is to learn to
\nsay only what is useful in the most accurate and truthful way possible. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>5 March 1933<\/span> <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Sometimes I become absolutely calm. I speak to nobody. I walk about
\nalone, thinking of the Divine. If someone talks to me and sometimes speaks
\nunnecessarily, I don\u2019t answer him. Is it all right to keep this condition all
\nthe time? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is an excellent condition, which can be
\nmaintained without any harm, but it must be sincere. That is, it must not be an
\nappearance of calm, but a true and deep calm, which spontaneously keeps you
\nsilent. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>9 March 1933<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

(About a picture on an envelope) Is it a goat? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is an antelope, with the significance
\n\u201cswiftness of movement\u201d.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>The
\ngoat is\u00a0 <\/span>\u201cagility\u201d. <\/span><\/p>\n

9 March 1933\u00b9<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n\u00b9<\/font><\/span>This
\ndate is the same as the one above it because the disciple sometimes
\ncorresponded more than once a day.<\/font><\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>Page
\n\u2014 8<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

(About a picture of some pigs)<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The envelope I am sending you represents the
\nobscure movements of the vital in the nature. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 March 1933<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t know which comes first, second, etc. For example, what
\ncomes after Truth? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

After Truth comes Truth and again Truth! <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 March 1933<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

At night I sleep well only after <\/span><\/i>11:00<\/span><\/i>. I get up at <\/span><\/i>5:30<\/span><\/i>, but I wake up at <\/span><\/i>4:00<\/span><\/i> or <\/span><\/i>4:30<\/span><\/i>. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is not good to lie in bed when you are
\nawake; it is more tiring than restful and it also increases tamas. It is better
\nto jump out of bed as soon as you wake up; then in the evening you will feel
\nsleepy and can get to sleep earlier. The hours of sleep before <\/span>midnight<\/span>} are the best and most restful. <\/span><\/p>\n

25 March 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

In the story of Prahlad the child was about to die, but he thought
\nonly of the Divine who in his consciousness replaced the fire that was to burn
\nhim. Death was changed into life, into joy, and through that he realised the
\nDivine Light. Does this story mean that through the Divine or the divine help,
\ndifficult things can be changed into easy things, even death into life? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, it is morally true and one day it
\nwill also be physically true. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>26 March 1933<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span>Page – 9<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I want to ask you two other things I remember now. Write for me:
\n\u201cDo not read stories to console the vital.\u201d And the second: \u201dDo not speak unnecessarily
\nto satisfy or please the vital.\u201d<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Do not waste time reading frivolous and
\nunwholesome things. Do not waste your energy in idle small talk. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>28 March 1933 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What does \u201ccompassion\u201d mean? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Compassion is the equivalent of mis\u00e8ricorde<\/i>. It is a pity full of strength and kindness, a pity that pardons
\nand makes amends, forgets all offences and wants always what is best for
\neveryone. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>31 March 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

I am observing myself and I find no special movement or any doubt
\nand what is more I feel happy. But sometimes it happens that the observation is
\nnot quite true. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

One needs to have reached a pinnacle of
\nwisdom before one can hope never to be mistaken. All of you have much to do
\nbefore that. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>3 April 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>Y is a good boy \u2014 there are some fine qualities in his character.
\nBut one bad thing I find in him is vanity. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

He is very young \u2014 he will grow out of it.
\nHave you no vanity at all in you that you can reproach others with it? <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>3 April 1933<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span>Page
\n-10<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

(After describing a dream the disciple commented:) I have not
\nwritten just exactly how I saw things in the dream because it is difficult to
\ndescribe. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I advise you to be very attentive and
\nscrupulous about saying only what is perfectly accurate. It is very easy to
\nmake things up when one is telling a dream and then it no longer has any value.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>10 April 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

What is the significance of this picture showing a young girl with
\nher hand on a lion\u2019s back? \u201cWith the help of the divine power all the hostile
\nforces can become calm and peaceful\u201d \u2014 is that it? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The lion is the symbol of power. It would
\nbe better to say that under the control of the Divine Will, power is
\nbeneficent, while without that control it harms everyone and becomes terrible. <\/span><\/p>\n

10 April 1933<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

(About a picture of some hunters which the disciple sent to the
\nMother)<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

What an ugly picture you have sent me! The
\nmen are sinister brutes, the cruellest of all living creatures. <\/span><\/p>\n

12 April 1933<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

The Divine is the true supreme goal of our life. We must fulfil
\nthe divine will. But who is the Divine, and what is the divine will? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

These are things one cannot speak about;
\nthey have to be discovered through personal experience. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>13 April 1933<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span>Page
\n\u2014 11<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I have faith in my strength and believe I am capable of doing all
\nthe work. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is not in your <\/i>own strength that you should have faith. It is in the <\/i>divine force, which works in all who
\nare consecrated to the Divine and sustains them in their action. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I have faith that I am capable of doing all the work. I like the
\nwork a lot; so if you don\u2019t mind, I would like to continue. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I repeat: having faith in yourself <\/i>cannot take you very far and it
\nis certain that sooner or later you will feel a reaction and be obliged to
\nstop. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>First
\nestablish the true attitude, which is to find your base, your support and your
\nhelp in the Divine alone <\/i>\u2014 then all
\npossibility of fatigue will disappear. Until then it is better to let the
\nservant do at least part of the work, which you can supervise if you like. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>17 April 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

After finishing the meter-reading work,\u00b9 I felt very tired. It seemed
\nto me that something wanted to prevent me from doing any more work, so I pulled
\nmyself up and said to myself, \u201cNo, no, you must work. Have faith, everything
\nwill go away.\u201d And indeed, the tiredness disappeared. In the evening I had a
\nvery bad stomach-ache. I thought that it too wanted to prevent me from working.
\nBut I told myself, \u201cNo, you must work. It is only through work or through faith
\nthat the pain will go away. If you rest, it will get worse.\u201d As I expected, the
\npain went away after my supper. O my<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\n <\/span><\/p>\n


\n\u00b9The
\nelectricity meters of the Ashram houses. The disciple read them daily in order
\nto record the consumption of electricity.<\/font><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\n Page
\n– 12<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

\u00a0<\/span>divine Mother, grant that
\nmy faith in you may become more and more unshakable and strong. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The faith is in your active consciousness
\nand your will, but it is not yet in your body; that is why your body feels
\ntired and suffers; you must give it some rest. Until you know how to organise
\nyour work and eliminate all the useless coming and going, it would be better to
\ngive up the sweeping work and leave it to a servant; or if you insist on doing
\nthe sweeping, you should find someone to take care of your garden. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 April 1933 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span>This evening I was extremely tired. It wasn\u2019t even possible to write
\ndown the meter-readings. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If you are tired, you must organise your
\nwork to avoid so much coming and going. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>26 April 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Now I have something else to ask of you. Would you please write that
\nI should never under any circumstance touch women nor allow them to touch me. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Since you feel that you are weak in regard
\nto women, never touch a woman. Never allow a woman to touch you. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 May 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

This morning I felt some weakness. But in the afternoon, on the
\ncontrary, I felt joyful; all my anxiety had disappeared. Why was this? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Joy comes from surrender to the divine
\ncommand. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>6 May 1933<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span>Page
\n– 13<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

If you don\u2019t mind, I would like to have a stool to put the
\nfile-box on. As it is very low, it is a little difficult to take things out of
\nit. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Why do you always want things to be easy? <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 May 1933<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

I have the feeling that the tiredness has disappeared. If so, then
\nis it necessary to take a rest during the day? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, it is better to rest for a little
\nwhile during the day. At your age you are still growing and you need a lot of
\nrest alternated with strenuous activity. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>22 May 1933<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Is there any difference between the answers \u201cyou may\u201d and \u201cif you
\nwish\u201d? I think that when you answer \u201cif you wish\u201d, it means that you don\u2019t like
\nit very much. Is it so? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIf you wish\u201d obviously implies that there
\nis a risk that the consequences of what you want to do may not be very good for
\nyour Sadhana, but also that perhaps you are not yet ready to make the progress
\nnecessary for you not to do what you would like to do. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>29 May 1933 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span>How should I meditate? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Fix your mind on the aspiration and
\ndismiss everything else. <\/span><\/p>\n

  <\/span><\/p>\n

If thoughts come, what should I do?<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span>Page
\n– 14<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

 Dismiss them.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Nowadays I don\u2019t know what to write; everything I need to know,
\nyou tell me inwardly. Then how shall I hear it?<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Listen in a total silence of your whole
\nbeing mental, vital and physical. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>6 July 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

When I go to eat at the dining-room they sometimes give extra
\nvegetables. Is it good to take them? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, it is good, if they are given. What
\nis not good is to ask. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>14 July 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Where should I learn good French style? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is taught in advanced grammar courses,
\nand there are also special books. One of the principal rules of style is that
\nin a prose passage one should not use \u201cI\u201d except when it is absolutely
\nimpossible to avoid it, and in any case one
\nshould never begin two consecutive sentences <\/i>with \u201cI\u201d. This gives you an
\nidea of what you must do to give some style to your daily report! <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>20 July 1933<\/span><\/i>  <\/span><\/p>\n

You should eat in moderation, that is to
\nsay, without taking too much, because gluttony is always bad. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>26 July 1933 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

  <\/span>Break the bonds of the limited consciousness. Illumine the consciousness, fill it with life, make it resplendent. You
\nmust do this quickly.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/i>Page
\n– 15<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

What is done in a hurry is never done
\nwell. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>29 July 1933 <\/span><\/i>  <\/span><\/p>\n

This morning during pranam I was sitting in the pranam room. Sweet
\nand humble tears began to flow; there were intense and ardent prayers. Love and
\njoy were also there. What happiness! What is this movement? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is a contact established with the
\npsychic, the true soul. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>8 September 1933<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Will you please explain to me why I felt a trembling when Z was
\ndispleased? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Vital movements (desire, anger, fright,
\netc.) produce vibrations, which spread through the atmosphere like waves of
\nelectricity and strike those who are open, sensitive or weak. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>16 September 1933 <\/span><\/i>  <\/span><\/p>\n

Today I am feeling tired. I think I have not taken enough rest.
\nBut what to do? I can\u2019t find time! <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If your day were organised more logically,
\navoiding a lot of useless coming and going, you would certainly have time to
\nrest.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>30 September 1933<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span>Page
\n– 16<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

If someone loses or breaks something, is it true that he ought to
\nfeel uneasy or sad? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t see how feeling uneasy or sad can
\nhelp to find what has been lost or repair what has been broken! <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>1 November 1933<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Instinctively I uttered the following words: \u201cMy little garden is
\nopening to the Divine Consciousness.\u201d <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Plants too can open to the Divine. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>5 November 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

May I have some kerosene and soap to prepare a liquid for killing
\ninsects? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, but kerosene is dangerous to plants \u2014
\nbe careful not to kill them along with the insects. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>7 November 1933<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>When a depression comes, what should one do? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Shake it off, as you shake off the dust
\nfrom your feet. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>8 November 1933 <\/span><\/i>  <\/span><\/p>\n

I think that a depression fell on me when I got up this afternoon.
\nI can\u2019t find any reason for it. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

During sleep one often comes in contact
\nwith undesirable forces and things, which drain your vital forces so that when
\nyou wake up you feel weak and depressed. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 November 1933<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

  <\/span>Page  17<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

What is real happiness and when does it come? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

When one no longer feels any attraction
\nfor the other, false happiness.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>Real
\nhappiness is of divine origin; it is pure and unconditioned. Ordinary happiness
\nis of vital origin; it is impure and depends on circumstances. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 November 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

What does life-energy mean? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is the energy that creates and sustains
\nlife in the physical organism; it is this energy which is used, when it is
\nconsecrated to the Divine, to transform the body and its activities. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>1 December 1933<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

X told me, \u201cMockery is not bad; if you never mock, you are like a
\ntree without sap.\u201d Is it true? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

No, it is not true. Mockery is not at all
\na sign of intellectual superiority, but of ignorant mental arrogance. The
\npsychic never mocks. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>2 December 1933<\/span><\/i>  <\/span><\/p>\n

I said, \u201cY, we must not see the bad side of people, but always the
\ngood.\u201d He answered, \u201cNo, we must see both sides and then distinguish between
\nthem.\u201d <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is certainly very bad to speak about
\nthe faults of others. Each one has his faults and to emphasise them in your
\nthoughts certainly does not help to cure them. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 December 1933<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span>Page
\n– 18<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Z told me that if I had no time to read newspapers, I should at
\nleast glance at them. I asked him, \u201cIs it a law that we must read newspapers?\u201d
\nHe answered, \u201cI have to know what is going on in the world too; I am not a
\nsannyasi.\u201d <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I am not a sannyasi and I never read a
\nnewspaper! I don\u2019t have time for it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>It
\nis difficult to read newspapers without having the consciousness descend to a
\nvery ordinary level. Only when the consciousness is firmly established in union
\nwith the Divine is it possible to read newspapers without any risk of falling
\ninto a lower consciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>5 December 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Sri Aurobindo has written to X that the Mother does not want him
\nor me to accept anything from Y. Will you tell me what happens when one accepts
\nsomething from a person? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If you want to progress in yoga, you
\nshould receive things only from the Divine. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>10 December 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span>A few days ago I felt that I had risen into a happy consciousness,
\nbut a few days later I felt quite the opposite: I had again fallen very low.
\nNow I am feeling all right. Will you explain this movement to me? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is a very common movement of the
\nconsciousness, which finds it somewhat difficult to remain in a state higher
\nthan its ordinary condition. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>12 December 1933<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span>Page
\n– 19<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Would you please tell me the reason for the cyclone? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The cyclone was the result of a violent
\nattack of hostile forces. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 December 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Do you think that solely through an intense aspiration one can
\ngain silence of the whole being and do sadhana by that silence? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Can all the impurities of the mind, vital and physical disappear
\nby the descent of this silence? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Silence cannot cure all the impurities,
\nbut it alleviates a great many of them. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 December 1933 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>Isn\u2019t it true that to read monthlies and stories one has to sink
\ninto an altogether ordinary consciousness? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It isn\u2019t obligatory<\/i>, but it is very difficult to do otherwise. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>28 December 1933 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

  <\/span><\/p>\n

When is it possible for the Divine to pour out his love upon the
\nvital and for the vital to be influenced by him alone? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

When the vital is converted \u2014 that is,
\nwhen it wants the Divine. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>30 December 1933 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span>Page
\n– 20<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

This evening Z talked to me about yoga. I know now that it wasn\u2019t
\nvery good to have talked with her. It would have been better if I hadn\u2019t done
\nit. But do you think it has done me any harm? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

We should not get upset about the mistakes
\nwe make; we need only maintain a \u00a0<\/span>\u2014 <\/i>then all will be well in the end. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 January 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

When X was ill on December 31st you asked Dr. Babu<\/span>,
\n\u201cCan\u2019t X get better by tonight?\u201d If instead of saying, \u201cIt is impossible\u201d, he
\nhad answered, \u201cIf it is your will, it can be done\u201d, then perhaps X could have
\nattended the midnight meditation for the New Year. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

An answer
\n<\/i>is not enough to change the course of events. Only aspiration or faith can
\ndo that \u2014 for it is aspiration and faith that allow the Divine Grace to act. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>9 January 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Isn\u2019t it true, Mother, that the vital will soon be surrendered to
\nyou? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, if it is sincere in its aspiration,
\nit will soon be converted. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>11 January 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

What does \u201csincere aspiration\u201d mean? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

An aspiration that is not mixed with any
\negoistic or self-interested calculation. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>12 January 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span>Page
\n– 21<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

What do you think about the love between Y\u00b9 and me? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Only the love that is based on the Divine
\nPresence can remain unmixed and present no obstacle to the sadhana<\/span>.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>17 January 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>\u2026So I don\u2019t feel any repulsion for Z. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Repulsion is always a bad thing and just
\nthe other side of attachment. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>19 January 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>I told X not to do exercises because his body is weak. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 It is never good to tell someone that he is
\nweak. That is not the way to make him strong \u2014 on the contrary! <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>20 January 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>Sweet Mother! Tell me what I must do to get rid of this attachment
\nfor Y. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The best thing is to try not to think
\nabout it any more. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>20 January 1934 <\/span><\/i>  <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>I think that the Mother doesn\u2019t like someone to go to another
\nperson\u2019s place except for Her work. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

That is because when people meet outside
\ntheir work they usually indulge in idle chit-chat and it is not good for them. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>27 January 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n


\n\u00b9A young
\nfellow-disciple<\/font><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\n Page
\n-22<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

My sister asked me, \u201cWill you come to my house?\u201d I replied, \u201cI
\nwill see; I will ask Mother.\u201d <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

In her case you should apply the same rule
\nthat applies to other Sadhaks<\/span>. See her only when it
\nis necessary and speak to her only when it is indispensable. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>1 February 1934<\/span><\/i>  <\/span><\/p>\n

Should I inform my sister that it would be better if she speaks to
\nme only when it is indispensable? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You can always tell her that you don\u2019t
\nlike to chat idly. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>3 February 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Z asked me, \u201cWhen a man becomes spiritually realised (siddha<\/span>), what will he do? Perhaps he will go somewhere and
\nopen an Ashram and the Mother will work through him.\u201d <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Our aim is quite different. It is most
\nunlikely that for a long time to come any new centres will be established, at
\nleast with our full approval. What we want to realise requires concentration
\nrather than expansion. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>5 February 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>Mother! Don\u2019t you think that as long as the body exists we shall
\nmake mistakes and sometimes forget things? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 Not necessarily. It all depends on the
\ndevelopment of the consciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>6 February 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span>Page
\n– 23<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

May I know how the vital works? I think it is still full of
\nimpurities. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Thinking too much about one\u2019s impurities does
\nnot help. It is better to keep your thought fixed on the purity, light and
\npeace that you want to acquire. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>7 February 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Just now I feel that all is at rest. What is this state \u2014 true
\nrest, or a formation? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Why disturb the rest with useless questions?
\nThe mind also should be at rest. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>8 February 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

This morning during the general meditation I felt some pressure. I
\nhope it will not become a hindrance to my studies; in that case I think it
\nwould be better not to meditate. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I see no reason why meditation, properly
\ndone, should be a hindrance to study \u2014 quite the opposite. Only if what you
\ncall \u201cmeditation\u201d is not meditation at all, but a state of inert passivity<\/i> and drowsiness, can it harm your studies; and as
\nthat state is thoroughly undesirable from every point of view, of course it is
\nbetter not to indulge in it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>12 February 1934 <\/span><\/i>  <\/span><\/p>\n

What is real meditation then? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is an active and deliberate
\nconcentration on the Divine Presence and a sustained, alert contemplation of
\nthat Sublime Reality. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>Page
\n– 24<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

How and why does this pressure come? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If you mean the pressure of inert
\npassivity, it comes from the resistance of the lower vital and the obscurity of
\nthe material nature. It can be overcome by an untiring will and aspiration. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>12 February 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Mother, may I know something about this depression how did it
\ncome? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The depression was in the general
\natmosphere and it attacked everyone who was open to it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>1 March 1934 <\/span><\/i>  <\/span><\/p>\n

So what can be done to avoid being attacked by depression? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Pay no attention to it and behave as if it
\nwere not there. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

But first of all, how does one know that the depression is in the
\natmosphere before it enters us? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

This is not correct. You can see and feel
\nthings at a distance, things that are outside of you. In the same way you can
\nfeel depression in the atmosphere before it touches you. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>1 March 1934 <\/span><\/i>  <\/span><\/p>\n

I don \u2018t understand why X still wants my contact. Will she never
\nstop? Never mind \u2014 I have only to remain firmly on my guard. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, that is all there is to do. When you
\nno longer have any weakness for women, they will stop
\npursuing you.<\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 25<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Sweet Mother! What is the quickest way to overcome this weakness? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Think of other things. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>12 March 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

My jealousy must be destroyed, Sweet Mother! Let me become aware
\nof the jealousy and reject it immediately. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If you could just understand that what I
\ndo is always for the good of each and
\nevery one <\/i>and never for the good of a few at the expense of others, you
\nwould very soon overcome your jealousy and be delivered from this painful sore
\nspot. <\/span><\/p>\n

Be convinced that what I
\ndo for you is always exactly what you need in order to advance on the way; then
\nall jealousy and envy will disappear. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>20 March 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Mother, please explain why I felt some hesitation about speaking
\nto Y. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It was the influence of her external will
\nacting on your mind and vital. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>20 March 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Why doesn\u2019t the influence of each person\u2019s external will act on
\nothers, as in the case of Y and me? For example, I don\u2019t like speaking with my
\nsister, but she talks to me; that shows that the influence of my external will doesn\u2019t act either on her vital or her mind. Why?
\n <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 26<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

That proves that her will is as strong as
\nyours \u2014 and that is very good. By what right do you want your will to act on
\nothers? Each one must be free. Only the Guru has the right to impose his will
\nupon the will of the disciple who has chosen him. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>21 March 1934 <\/span> <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, if the thought, \u201cWhat you do is always for my good\u201d, is
\nfirmly established in the mind, then won\u2019t the mind be able to influence the
\nvital being? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Certainly; but in return the vital being
\noften influences the mind and creates doubts in it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>21 March 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

This morning during pranam<\/span> there was a
\npsychic depression. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The psychic is never depressed. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

During the depression I prayed, \u201cHow unfaithful the vital is!
\nMother does so much for me, but still it rebels. O Sweet Mother, grant that the
\nvital may no longer rebel and come to believe in the Divine alone.\u201d Who
\nobserves this movement? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is the part of the mind that is
\nconverted; it detaches itself from the rest, observes, judges and regrets the
\nbehaviour of the ordinary mind and the unregenerate vital. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>21 March 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 27<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Isn\u2019t it true that there are three kinds of depression: depression
\nof the mind, of the vital and also of the psychic? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I tell you that the psychic does not know depression <\/i>because it is divine by
\nnature, and in the Divine there is no
\ndepression<\/i>.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Doesn\u2019t the psychic get depressed when the mind and the vital act
\nas they want and disobey the Divine or rebel against Him? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

No, no, no. Do you understand? <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0     <\/span>The
\npsychic may see and regret the stupidity of the other parts of the being, but
\nby its very nature it is impossible for it to be depressed. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>22 March 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Yesterday you wrote, \u201cThat proves that her will is as strong as
\nyours \u2014 and that is very good.\u201d I don\u2019t understand what you mean by \u201cthat is
\nvery good\u201d. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is always very good when someone has a
\nstrong will. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>22 March 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

How does Y\u2019s will act on me, while mine does not act on my sister?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

This simply shows that you are more open
\nto Y\u2019s influence than your sister is to yours. It is always regrettable when
\none is open to the influence of another person. One should receive no other
\ninfluence than that of the Divine. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>22 March 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 28<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Is there a way for the mental being to avoid being influenced by
\nthe vital? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Let the mind receive the light from above
\nand refuse to be influenced. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>22 March 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

What can I do about being influenced by Y? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Pay no attention to her, in thought and
\ndeed. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

How am I influenced by her? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Because you feel an attraction for her, and
\nher will seems to be stronger than yours. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Since my sister has a strong will to speak to me, I don\u2019t
\nunderstand how that can be good? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

That is a desire or an instinct rather
\nthan a will. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>I
\nam not saying it is good that she wants to talk with you; I am saying that in
\ngeneral it is good to have a strong will. When you have a strong will you have
\nonly to direct it properly; when you do not have a will you first have to
\ndevelop one, which always takes time and is sometimes difficult. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>Before
\nasking random questions you would do well to think a bit and try to understand
\nby yourself. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 March 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

I stayed behind after pranam<\/span> because you
\ntold me that you had no objection if a few people remained. Today I didn\u2019t stay
\nbecause Z told me that the Mother had forbidden it.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 29<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I had a notice put up when there were a
\nlot of outside visitors who all used to stay, and also because more and more
\npeople were getting into the habit of sitting down after pranam<\/span>
\nand watching the others, as if it were some kind of show. But if only a few
\npeople stay, I do not mind. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 March 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Since this evening I have been feeling that a dark cloud has
\nlifted and I feel happy. Is it true? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You must will <\/i>that it may be true and lasting. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 March 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What can I do to strengthen my will? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Educate it, exercise it, as you exercise
\nyour muscles \u2014 through use. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>26 March 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, do you want me to write a prayer every time? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You should write only when the prayer
\ncomes spontaneously. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>31 March 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

The months are passing quickly and my weakness is increasing. How
\nuneasy I feel! How disobedient, insincere, jealous, weak, covered with passion,
\nignorance and falsehood! I am unable to see my lower nature. O Mother, what
\nshall I do? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is better not to look at it too much
\nand to turn your attention <\/span>to more
\ninteresting things. \u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 30<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

\nOne becomes
\nwhat one thinks: you should think of the strength, the uprightness, the
\nsincerity you wish to become. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>March 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

How can there be any hope for me, seeing that there is no vigorous
\neffort to purify the lower nature? Why do I think about others? What good will
\nit do me? O Mother, I am fit for nothing! There is still no candid and sincere
\naspiration. O Mother! Give me some advice. I am an ignorant and obscure child.
\nGuide me, show me the true path. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You seem to be very conscious already of
\nwhat ought and ought not to be done, but with you the difficulty begins with
\nputting it into practice. You should ask, not for more knowledge, but for the
\nstrength and courage to apply sincerely and scrupulously the little you already
\nknow. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 April 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t know what it is in me that hurts X. Since my nature is
\ninferior to his, I thought he might get affected by it. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Who told you that your nature is inferior
\nto X\u2019s? Each one has his own nature and follows his own path, and comparisons
\nwith others are always useless and most often dangerous. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 April 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Weakness. Last night Y asked me: \u201cHow do you say, \u2018Give me some
\nwater\u2019 in Gujarati?\u201d I gave her the answer. I cannot displease anyone. My
\nnature seems childish to me. What weakness! By this weakness I am creating
\ncountless difficulties for myself. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 31<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

You should not attach too much importance
\nto these little things. The important thing is never to lose sight of the ideal
\nyou wish to realise and always do your best to realise it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>6 April 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What is the significance of the flower \u201cRadha\u2019s<\/span>
\nconsciousness\u201d? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Consecration of love. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>6 April 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

My sister likes to talk to me, but I remain very serious with her.
\nI never smile at her when we meet. But that\u2019s how it is with nearly everyone. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You could smile at her if you smile at
\nothers. In a way smiling at your sister would be less dangerous than smiling at
\nY or Z. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>10 April 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, I am very happy to know that even a smile is dangerous. I
\nwill never smile at any woman. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

This resolution is perhaps a bit severe.
\nThat was not the object of my remark, but rather that you should not treat your
\nsister too badly for she can make nothing of it. The truth is this: your
\nconsecration to the Divine should be so complete that you no longer attach any
\nimportance to these relations with others. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>11 April 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 32<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

You told me, \u201cThe truth is this: your consecration to the Divine
\nshould be so complete that you no longer attach any importance to these
\nrelations with others.\u201d How can I apply this in practice? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You should concern yourself more with
\nstrengthening your consecration to the Divine than with working out the details
\nof your relations with people. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>12 April 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Divine Mother! Tomorrow is the day of the attack. It comes at
\nabout seven o\u2019clock \u2014 a revolt of the vital. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t understand what you mean. Why
\nacknowledge and accept a bad habit? <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>21 April 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I wrote this because the attack came last Sunday and the Sunday
\nbefore, so I thought that it might come this Sunday too. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is better to reject these thoughts,
\nbecause they help to bring the attack. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>21 April 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t think that X and I are making good use of our friendship.
\nWe often have useless and dangerous conversations. Wouldn\u2019t it be better not to
\nsee him too much? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I think it would be far more advisable to
\nget into the habit of controlling your
\nspeech <\/i>and refusing to speak about unwholesome and dangerous topics;   <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 33<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

\nbut obviously if
\nyour getting together arouses in both of you the very thing you want to
\novercome, it is surely better to refrain from it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>26 April 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Usually it is X who speaks about yoga. For example: \u201cY\u2019s music
\ncomes from the vital; that is why Mother has forbidden him to sing.\u201d <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If your conversations are restricted to
\nremarks of this kind, they have no more importance than all the countless
\nignorant remarks which the members of the Ashram are in the habit of exchanging
\namong themselves when they think they are capable of knowing what I do and why
\nI do it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>27 April 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Sweet Mother! I felt some uneasiness tonight. Did this uneasiness
\ncome from my contact with Z, or was there some other reason for it? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Possibly \u2014 but as a general rule there are
\nrarely any reasonable reasons for this kind of uneasiness, except that the
\nvital has a small movement of dissatisfaction or revolt. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>1 May 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I found some pieces of paper with Sri Aurobindo\u2019s handwriting on
\nthem. They had been thrown into the dustbin at Tresor House. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I hope you picked them up and kept them. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 May 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 34<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I have been feeling uneasy, tired and depressed since this
\nmorning. I spend a lot of time in a state of inertia, I am not sincere and I am
\nrestless. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The outer nature is always full of
\nimperfections until it is transformed by the divine Presence. But it is wrong
\nto let these things depress you. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 May 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

When I removed my bed sheet a scorpion fell on the floor. I
\ntouched it with my sandal and killed it before it could get away. A few days
\nago I saw almost the same thing in a dream. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

That is what is called a premonitory
\ndream. You saw beforehand what was going to happen. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>7 May 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I am often deceived by other people\u2019s suggestions. They frequently
\nseem right to me, but often they are wrong. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

That is quite true. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

For example, I hadn\u2019t thought of asking you about the significance
\nof the scorpion dream; it was X who suggested that I should ask you. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, it is better to do only what comes
\nfrom deep within yourself. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>9 May 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 35<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Last night I did some grammar exercises which kept me busy up to
\n11:45. I didn\u2019t feel sleepy. Is that good? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

No, I don\u2019t find it good at all. You
\nshould go to bed by ten at the latest. Sleep is a matter of habit. If you get
\ninto the habit of always going to bed at the same time, sleep will come
\nautomatically. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>9 May 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Two days ago I went to Y\u2019s place to pick some flowers in the
\nmorning. When I saw her I felt a trembling and immediately afterwards some
\nuneasiness. I think it is the vital that caught the uneasiness, but I don\u2019t
\nunderstand why I felt this uneasiness when I saw her. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Some people carry around them these ideas
\nof despair and depression and are harassed by them. These ideas are contagious,
\nlike an illness, and one catches them just as one catches any other illness. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>14 May 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

How can I avoid being attacked by these wild and hostile ideas? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You must learn to reject them when they
\ncome. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Not to come into contact with the people who carry them? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

That is impossible \u2014 there would be too
\nmany people to avoid. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

But the point is to know who is carrying them? <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 36<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

That is impossible by any outer method; it
\nis only by acquiring an inner discrimination that these things can be known. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 May 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

You told me, \u201cI would be surprised if Y took your advice
\nseriously.\u201d Does that mean that one should not take someone else\u2019s advice
\nseriously? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

As a general rule it is better not to give
\nadvice unless you are asked for it. But if you receive some advice from
\nsomeone, you should think it over carefully and try to take advantage of it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>16 May 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Sweet Mother, why do we doubt you? Is there anything better or
\nanyone wiser than you? Why don\u2019t we believe in you? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Because the outer nature is ignorant,
\nobscure and foolish, so naturally its behaviour and its action are also ignorant,
\nobscure and foolish. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>16 May 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

When I saw Z this morning I felt a trembling, but this evening I
\ndidn\u2019t feel it. Why is that? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You were probably more active and less
\nopen to vital contacts in the evening than in the morning. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If one can distinguish all the day\u2019s movements by standing back
\nfrom them like an observer, then I think that one can soon rise above the lower
\nnature.  <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 37<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

But in order to get the true discrimination, one must first have a
\nconsciousness that can distinguish falsehood from truth. I observe my
\nmovements, but I am still unable to make a clear distinction between darkness
\nand light.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, this is true. But discrimination
\ngrows through exercise and control. In other words, you ask me if what you have
\nobserved is correct, and with the help of my answers you can rectify your
\nobservations. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>17 May 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

This morning Z asked me, \u201cWhy didn\u2019t X drink his cocoa and why is
\nhe taking a walk?\u201d I told her what I thought about it.<\/span><\/i>
\n<\/font>
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

Speaking about others is not only useless
\nbut most often harmful. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

But why seek to know the motives of other people\u2019s actions? I
\ndon\u2019t know what to do in such cases. If someone asks me, I simply have to
\nanswer. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You can always say, \u201cMother does not like us
\nto gossip about others.\u201d <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 May 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

But it all depends on the person we tell this to. What if he
\nrebels? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

So much the worse for him! <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

What should I do so as not to open myself to vital contacts?<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 38<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Fix your consciousness higher than the
\nvital. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 May 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I have decided to smile only at a few people and never at a woman.
\nIs this all right? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Always to maintain an attitude of
\nconcentration on the Divine Life is more important than making rules that are too
\nrigid. It would be better to resolve not to smile in expectation of a vital
\ninterchange. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>21 May 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Isn\u2019t it true that one should know all one\u2019s impurities? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Knowing them is indeed necessary, but it
\nis not good to fix one\u2019s\u00a0 <\/span>attention too
\nconstantly on them; it does not help to remove them <\/span>\u2014\u2014<\/span> on
\nthe contrary. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>21 May 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Z asked me, \u201cWhat is that?\u201d I replied, \u201cMother wrote something to
\nme for my birthday.\u201d \u201cMay I see it?\u201d she said. I let her read it. I don\u2019t think
\nI did the right thing. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Obviously, when I give a prayer on such an
\noccasion I concentrate a certain force in it. By showing the prayer to others
\nyou destroy a great deal of the effect of this force. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>22 May 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I think there is also some force in your letters, so it is better not
\nto show them to anyone. <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 39<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Yes, and as a rule I do not like answering
\nquestions about others. In yoga each one should attend to his own progress \u2014
\nthe progress of others has nothing to do with him. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 May 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Isn\u2019t it better to tell you the ideas we have about someone so
\nthat you can correct them? Because if they are wrong, it is very dangerous. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Certainly, and the best thing is precisely
\nto refrain from all ideas about people, for then there isn\u2019t any risk of having
\nwrong ideas.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Of course, the best thing is not to have any ideas about people,
\nbut I don\u2019t think this is possible until the mind is purified.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, it is quite possible if the mind is
\ninterested and engrossed in something more useful. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 May 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

So it would be better to reject the ideas I have about others and
\nstop making mental constructions about people? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, it is preferable. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Is it good for me to see X? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

That depends on what you mean by seeing
\nhim; if it is to exchange a few words or to do some work together from time to
\ntime, it does not matter. But long conversations should be avoided. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 May 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 40<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

What pleasure does one get out of making fun of others? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Indeed, I fail to see what pleasure one finds
\nin hurting other people\u2019s feelings. It is not nice and shows so much
\npretentious foolishness. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 May 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Was it right to write this to you: \u201cA man like Y thinks he is very
\ndisciplined. Where is his discipline when he talks like this?\u201d Aren\u2019t my last
\nwords exaggerated? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

They may not be exaggerated, but in any
\ncase they are not very kind, and kindness is an indispensable step towards the
\nwidening and illumination of the consciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>25 May 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Sweet Mother! When will the vital yearn for the Divine? May its
\npassion be changed into psychic love, its anger into <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Equanimity <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

its jealousy into <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Trust <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

its vanity into <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Modesty <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

its selfishness into<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 41<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Self-giving. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>26 May 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

X used to go home with me after lunch, but yesterday he left
\nwithout me. He told me that he didn\u2019t have any reason for doing so. Is it true?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is quite possible that he left without
\nany reason. One does so many things without any conscious motive. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>26 May 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

You wrote that one does so many things without any conscious
\nmotive. But is that really desirable? I think it is better not to do anything
\nwithout thinking it over carefully. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Certainly, that is preferable. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>28 May 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

A dream: It was night, I was writing a poem. Suddenly Y came and
\nput out the kerosene lamp on the table. A little later she also switched off
\nthe electric light. Does this dream have any significance? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If the dream has a significance (which is
\nnot sure), it would mean that a certain type of hostile force took the likeness
\nof Y in your consciousness. Lights going out are always the symbol of the
\nconsciousness descending into unconsciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Sweet Mother, I would like to know why my consciousness is going
\noutwards and also why my aspiration has diminished.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 42<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Probably a part of your nature which is
\nnot yet converted has risen to the surface and is active at present. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>29 May 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

So what should I do when an unconverted part rises to the surface?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Put the light and the knowledge on it
\npatiently until it gets converted. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>29 May 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, you wrote that I should put the light and the knowledge on
\nthe unconverted part until it gets converted. I think it is You who can do
\nthat. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

That is exactly what I mean; you have only
\nto call Sri Aurobindo or myself and ask that this obscure part be enlightened
\nand converted. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>30 May 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Z often asks me questions about grammar. I don\u2019t know French well,
\nso it would be better if he didn\u2019t ask. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

What little you do know, you can tell to
\nothers, but take care to warn them that you do not know much and that you are
\nnot sure of the correctness of your answers. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>31 May 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Is it good to go to the temple? The idea came to me that if one
\nbelieves in the Divine without form, one  <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 43<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

will not believe in the Divine with form as a human being, I mean.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You mean: if one has faith in the god of a
\nreligion, how can one have faith in the incarnate Divine? That is quite right.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>\u00a0<\/span>1 June 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

May I take the geography books home? I won\u2019t let them out of my
\nroom. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, you may take the geography books, but
\nyou must take great care of them so that they don\u2019t get torn or stained or
\neaten by insects. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>2 June 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t understand why and how X has had difficulties because of
\naffection. I haven\u2019t had them. Perhaps it is because I am not aware of them. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is because affection creates an
\nattachment in him, and all attachment is contrary to Yoga. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 June 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Does affection create attachment in me? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Affection always creates attachment,
\nunless one is a yogi. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It seems that there is no electricity in the vital world the
\ndreams are always dark. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Who told you this extraordinary tale? <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>Certainly
\nthere is no electricity such as men use in the  <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 44<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

physical world. But there are as many
\nlights as one could wish for \u2014 even most beautiful, most brilliant ones, so
\nthat unless one is forewarned one might believe oneself to be on a very high
\nplane. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 June 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

You say that there are as many lights in the vital world as one
\ncould wish for \u2014 but are they real lights or are they created by vital beings? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The lights in the vital world are vital
\nlights, of course. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

In my dreams I do not see daylight as I do here; I see everything
\nvery dim. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

That is because your vision is not fully
\ndeveloped in that world or because you go to dark places there. But that does
\nnot mean that the whole vital world is dark! <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>5 June 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

How can I keep the most enlightened part of my mind always on the
\nsurface? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Will for it, and call on the enlightened
\npart to intervene each time that the parts which are still obscure, ignorant
\nand egoistic try to dominate your being.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Why is it that you do not answer certain questions? Is it because the
\nquestion is not sincere? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Usually it is because the question is
\nbadly stated; often it is because it would not be good to reply. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>6 June 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 45<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

These last two days I have been feeling sad about my jealousy. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Feeling sad is of no use. All the energy
\nyou waste in feeling sad would better be used in transforming the wrong
\nmovement. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

But this morning, after my pranam<\/span>, I
\nfelt very happy. Is it impossible for the ordinary mind to turn easily towards
\nthe Divine, even when there is an intense aspiration? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

There is nothing impossible about a prompt
\nconversion; the difficult thing is to make it last. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>9 June 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Often when there is something to be done, two answers come. One
\npart says not to do it, the other says there is no harm in it. Who decides
\nwhich part is wrong and which is right? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If the psychic consciousness were fully
\nawakened, it would decide. But in this case it is one part of the mind arguing
\nwith another and, at best, it is the mental Purusha<\/span>
\nthat steps in and decides. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>11 June 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t quite understand what you mean by \u201cThere is nothing
\nimpossible about a prompt conversion; the difficult thing is to make it last.\u201d
\nIt gets converted for a moment and then falls back again? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes. The mind suddenly sees clearly and is
\nconverted, but then it is attacked again by obscurity and falls back into its
\nold habits. <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 46<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

How can the conversion of the ordinary mind be made lasting? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Persist in bringing it into contact with
\nthe light until the conversion becomes lasting. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>11 June 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

It seems that women have a power of attraction which they throw
\nupon men \u2014 a natural movement \u2014 and that men are caught like fish in a net and
\noften unable to escape. Is this true? What is the way to avoid being touched by
\nthis power, or what must we do to escape from it? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I think it is a mutual effect \u2014 and women
\ncomplain that men do the same thing to them. The remedy is to turn the
\nconsciousness towards the Divine alone. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>11 June 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Y told me that it is very good to take tea or coffee when one has
\na sore throat and that he takes it two or three times a day. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Each one has his own remedies and habits,
\nwhich may be good for him, but it would be a great mistake to generalise and
\ntry to apply them to other people. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>26 June 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I spent nearly three-quarters of the night awake. I think that
\nvisions are preventing me from sleeping. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

In any case, it is the restless and
\nunquiet vital. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>28 June 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 47<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

This afternoon I slept from 12:30 to 3:30; that is too long, I
\nthink. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

No, it is all right since you are sleeping
\nvery badly. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>28 June 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

How can I calm the vital so as to sleep better? By aspiration? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

And a concentration, a will to reject the
\nrestlessness. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

As for deciding about ghosts, I would like to know which part it
\nis that doubts the reasoning of the other parts. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

These are various fragments of the mind
\nopposing and contradicting one another, and they are not all at the same stage
\nof development. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>28 June 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

It would be very interesting to become conscious of anti-divine
\nghosts. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

So long as it is in order to reject or
\nconquer them. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>29 June 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

There are ghosts who try to lead us astray, but aren\u2019t there also
\nghosts who help us in our sadhana<\/span>? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I thought you were using the word \u201cghosts\u201d
\nto mean vital entities. Those beings are certainly not the ones who can help
\nyou in your sadhana<\/span>. <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 48<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I would like to know how to conquer these anti-divine ghosts. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

By willing to do so, and by always
\nrefusing to believe in their suggestions. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>29 June 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Yes, Mother, these vital entities lead us astray; but aren\u2019t there
\nbeings who can help us, lead us back to the right path? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, they do exist, but since they do not
\nbelong to the vital world that is nearest to the physical, it is more difficult
\nfor them to enter into contact with human beings. Their action is sometimes
\nperceptible in the mind, and in the psychic it is very clear. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

In a dream, I was gathering flowers in the garden of my house.
\nSuddenly the gate opened and three ladies came in. One lady asked me for
\nflowers. I answered her, \u201cAll the beautiful flowers will be sent to the Mother.
\nYou can take the ones that are not beautiful.\u201d But these ladies disturbed me. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

This is probably the symbol of certain
\nforces of the lower nature trying to seize hold of what is already given to the
\nDivine. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>30 June 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Yesterday I was in a very strange state: for five minutes I felt bad,
\nthen five minutes later I felt joyful, and so on for three hours. Then I
\nunderstood the whole game and I rejected it by will-power and prayer. But I
\nreally don\u2019t understand this movement.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 49<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Two parts of the vital being were
\nstruggling together, each one in turn getting the upper hand. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Z told me that in the mental and vital worlds there are beings who
\nare against the anti-divine entities and who help us. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Just as there are people on earth who like
\nto help others. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>2 July 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Today I feel happy. I would like to know whether this happiness is
\nspiritual or not. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Instead of asking yourself such questions,
\nit would be better to remain very quiet, concentrated and calm, so that the
\nhappiness may last. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>3 July 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

O Sweet Mother, teach me to remain unshakable when someone talks
\nto me, because afterwards my mind wanders. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Do not identify yourself with the
\nconversation. Watch it all from above and from a distance, as if someone else
\nwere listening and speaking, and say no more than is absolutely indispensable. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 July 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Today I experienced the force working in me. I wonder how I did
\nsuch a hard work digging for a whole hour without taking any rest. But I don\u2019t
\nunderstand why some trembling remained even after the work was over.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 50<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

<\/a>The force was probably a bit too much for
\nthe body, which found it difficult to bear \u2014 hence the trembling. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You wrote to me: \u201cSay no more than is absolutely indispensable.\u201d
\nBut what should I do when someone asks me an unnecessary question? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Just answer evasively with a word or two,
\nwithout attaching any importance to it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 July 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

How can I prepare my body to bear Your force, Sweet Mother? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The power to bear is found in calm and
\nquietness. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>5 July 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

X told me that it is very good to read Sri Aurobindo\u2019s<\/span>
\nmessages on doubt. \u201cIt is not at all necessary to read about doubt,\u201d I answered
\nhim. \u201cAt this stage I don\u2019t think it is possible to be free from all doubt,\u201d he
\nsaid. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is not only quite possible to be free
\nof all doubt, it is an absolutely indispensable condition; but before being
\nable to state with assurance that one is free from doubt, one should wait for a
\nfew months at least, in order to make sure. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>In
\nany case this kind of discussion is quite useless \u2014 it does not help to
\novercome doubt. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>9 July 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Remove all weakness from me. It is not as easy as people think,
\nDivine Mother, to become Your child integrally and perfectly. To do so one must\u2026 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 51<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Be very sincere and straightforward,
\ntolerate nothing in yourself that you could not show me without fear, and do
\nnothing that you would feel ashamed of doing before me. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>11 July 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

It seems that there is an ego in each state of consciousness; for
\nexample: mental ego, vital ego, physical ego. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

There is also a spiritual ego, and even
\nthe gods who live in the Overmind<\/span> have their egos. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

And each one must be freed from his ego in order to attain the
\ndivine bliss. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is not enough to surrender; the ego must
\nbe dissolved, must merge with the Divine, disappear in Him. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>12 July 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

I think that the Supramental<\/span> Gods have
\nno ego. So I believe that we must become egoless like them, on earth itself,
\nand then act according to the divine guidance. <\/span><\/i>
\n
\n<\/font>
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

I think it is useless to speculate just
\nnow about what may happen in the Supermind<\/span>. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>12 July 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

At five o\u2019clock I got ready to go and watch the Republic Day
\ncelebrations from the terrace of Aroum\u00e9<\/span>. But thinking
\nthat You would prefer that I didn\u2019t go, I came back.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 52<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I have no preference in this or in any
\nother matter. For each person the decision depends on his own need. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>14 July 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t understand what you mean by \u201cI have no preference\u2026\u201d Does
\nit mean that we have to decide for ourselves whether the thing is to be done or
\nnot, without asking You? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

No. I did not complete the sentence. I
\nmeant that I do not decide according to preferences<\/i>,
\nbut according to each one\u2019s need. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>16 July 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, it wasn\u2019t an explanation that my sister asked me for last
\ntime, but something about one of Sri Aurobindo\u2019s<\/span>
\nletters. When I read what she had written about the material world, about
\nleaving her house, I was \u2014 disturbed hence the obstacle to my aspiration. My
\nSweet Mother, I will do as You wish.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If it disturbs you, you need not listen to
\nwhat she says or explain Sri Aurobindo\u2019s<\/span> letters to
\nher. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

This evening I gave her an explanation without feeling disturbed. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

But obviously it is much better if you can
\novercome the weakness that makes you feel disturbed, because that is the true
\ncure. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 July 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 53<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

My sweet little Mother, <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Yesterday evening during the meditation I felt so much love \u2014 I
\nfelt waves, vibrations of love. But this love pours itself out on others.
\nBefore, when I felt a lot of love it remained silent; I became more serious and
\nI did not express it. But this time, on the contrary, I allowed the love to
\nexpress itself because I don\u2019t find it undesirable. But if You think it
\nnecessary, I will turn it inwards. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The love that one contains in silence acts
\nwithin oneself for purification and transformation. The love that one turns
\noutwards \u2014if one does it in a pure and disinterested way \u2014 may occasionally
\nhelp others. But most often they receive it wrongly\u2026So you must do as your instinct
\nguides you. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 July 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Today I spoke to twenty-four people; it is too much, I think.
\nSince this morning I have been feeling a lack of happiness; there is no bad
\nfeeling, but the love I felt is no longer there. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

That is quite natural \u2014 you have wasted it
\nright and left; instead of concentrating on the Divine what came from the
\nDivine, you have squandered it on others and lost it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 July 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

After reading your reply, Sweet Mother, I became serious. I
\nthought that I should keep silent, at least for today. A moment later another
\npart of my being said, \u201cIt is not a real silence but rather a dissatisfaction
\nof the vital, for you can very well see that there is not much happiness and
\nenthusiasm in it.\u201d I thought that the second part was right.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 54<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Both are partly true and partly false. It
\nis wise to receive the descending Force in silence and concentration, but this
\nsilence and concentration should not come from the vital’s<\/span>
\nresentment at not being allowed to follow its whims. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>This
\nconcentration and silence should not only be full of a great peace <\/i>but also of a very
\nintense happiness<\/i>. Then one knows that the movement is true and unmixed. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 July 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

O Mother, I want to become Your perfectly obedient child, I want
\nto know Your will before You express it. To achieve that I must\u2026<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Have no preference about anything except
\nto carry out the divine will. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>28 July 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Will You tell me, Mother, what to do to get rid of egoism? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

One achieves it by persistently willing
\nit. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>1 July 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

My sweet Mother, in a dream I saw You in various forms. You were
\nvery young, my age, about seventeen or eighteen, and yet I behaved towards You
\nas if I were Your child. But I doubt very much whether this young girl I called
\nMother was anything more than a being taking on Your form. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is not at all impossible that I should
\nappear in various forms, even in the form of a young girl. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>1 August 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 55<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I don\u2019t understand, Mother, why I so often see scorpions and
\nsnakes in my dreams. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

They are symbols of bad thoughts and
\nperverted or obscure energies. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>1 August 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, I don\u2019t know what to do about my studies when there is a
\npressure, because my mind stops working. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Just wait until your mind starts working
\nagain. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>2 August 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

This evening I talked unnecessarily, so that when You came I felt
\nnothing. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

When I saw you as I left, your atmosphere
\nwas very agitated and your consciousness quite superficial. I could clearly see
\nthat contact with all those women is not doing you any good.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 August 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Certainly I have no doubt that one day I will have love, but how
\ncan I spend even a day without love? Better to die than to remain without love
\nfor You \u2014 that is the suggestion that came to me. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

That is absurd. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>It
\nis not by dying but by living that one can realise love. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>20 August 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 56<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Everywhere in me I see nothing but obscurity and ignorance. When
\nwill I stop wasting time? Where are my obedience and my sincerity? Where is the
\npeace, the happiness? Why has my zeal dried up? Where am I, Mother? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is no use getting upset or tormenting
\nyourself. Only in peace and calm can the good experience return. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>22 August 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Will you tell me something about relationships with other people,
\nbecause it is not fully clear to me. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is impossible to give any external
\nrule, since each case should receive its own particular solution. The inner
\nattitude must be true <\/i>and perfectly
\nsincere. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 August 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

You wrote to me, concerning relationships with others, \u201cThe inner
\nattitude must be true and perfectly sincere.\u201d Since I don\u2019t have this attitude
\nyet, I think it would be better not to associate with anyone and wait until it
\ncomes. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You must make an effort to attain this
\nattitude \u2014 waiting is not enough. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>25 August 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Isn\u2019t my attitude towards Y undesirable? Sometimes I tease her by
\ngiving her flowers. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I cannot see any benefit in these
\nfamiliarities \u2014 surely they do not help to raise the consciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>27 August 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 57<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Somebody said that the monthly review \u201cThe Theosophical Path\u201d
\nhelped Sri Aurobindo<\/span> a lot. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

What nonsense is this!! <\/span><\/p>\n

Can Sri Aurobindo<\/span> be helped by anyone or anything? It is He who helps<\/i>, he is not helped! <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

When I came out of Z\u2019s house the love and happiness in me had
\ndisappeared. Besides, this is not the first time I have been disturbed by
\ncontact with her. So I got the idea to stop seeing her. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

After so often having the same experience
\nof losing everything there, I cannot understand why you continue to go! <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Normally what happens when You do not reply is that there is a
\nstruggle between two parts of the mind.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

When I do not reply, it is because it is
\nneither good nor bad, true nor false, and it would take too long to explain the
\ntruth. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Give me Your love, Mother. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I give it to you constantly, but you must
\nnot always lose it by continually repeating the same mistakes. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>30 August 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Please tell me what to do, Mother, so that nothing and no one can
\ndisturb me. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The whole being must be governed by the
\npsychic being and by that alone. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>31 August 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 58<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I don\u2019t know what to do, for my being has been under attack since
\nlast night. At the moment I feel restless, depressed, in darkness and
\nignorance. Above all, consciousness is absent. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The less importance one attaches to these
\ndark periods, the sooner they are over. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>5 September 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Where is my consciousness at the moment! What is the nature of
\nthis depression and why is it lasting so long? Before, Mother, Your force would
\ncome and drive it away. Where is that force now? Alas! I have lost it. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Be calm and quiet; it is only a crisis
\nwhich will pass with the increase of consciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>10 September 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Sweet Mother, I feel that I am doing something against Your will.
\nThis unknown thing is hostile and makes me feel bad. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I am not aware of anything special that is
\nbeing done against my will. But you must not let yourself be disturbed. You
\nmust will to become more and more honest and sincere, and, for the rest, rely
\non the divine Grace. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>11 September 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

The mind wants to know how this crisis came and why it has
\nremained so long. What should one do when this happens?<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 59<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

It has been quite a widespread attack.
\nWhen this happens, the best thing is to remain quiet without getting agitated
\neither inwardly or outwardly. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>14 September 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Even when I am in a good state of consciousness, the mind is not
\nalways at peace. There are all kinds of random thoughts. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is behind the mind, behind the vital,
\nin the psychic centre that one can find the quietness that never wavers. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 September 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

The pressure is constantly there. Grant me quietness, my sweet
\nMother. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I never cease pouring peace and quietness
\nand calm on you why don\u2019t you accept them? <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>17 September 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What must I do to accept the peace and quietness and calm? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Want them sincerely and integrally \u2014 not
\nonly with one part of your being. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Last night I talked with X until 11:40, But in spite of that \u2014 no
\nsleep! <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Staying up late is surely not the way to
\nprepare yourself to sleep well. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>17 September 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 60<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I must have felt something during my pranam<\/span>,
\nbecause afterwards I wept. O my sweet Mother, why? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Because during the pranam<\/span>
\nI reestablished<\/span> the contact between your ordinary
\nconsciousness and the psychic consciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>The
\nextreme sweetness of the psychic consciousness always makes the outer
\nconsciousness weep with emotion. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>21 September 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nFor a long time I have
\nbeen aspiring with all my heart, Mother, for You to grant me Your love and
\npeace. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

My love and peace are always with you \u2014 it
\nis for you to learn to receive them. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>22 September 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

This morning Y came up to me and I spoke freely with her. Then as
\nI was speaking, I felt as if I were surrounded by fire. I felt feverish almost
\nthe whole day. All these things come through contact with her, I think, so I
\nought to avoid her.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Rather than avoiding this person or that,
\nto no great effect, it would be so much better to change your consciousness, to
\nclose it to all these influences and keep it open only to the Divine! <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 September 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

For several days I have been feeling that Z has an attraction for me.
\nSince You wrote, \u201cRather than avoiding this person or that\u2026\u201d, I thought I could
\ntalk to her and thus gradually come to the true attitude. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother\u2026love.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 61<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

If it is divine love that you mean, one can
\nobtain it only by renouncing human love, which is a travesty and caricature of
\nit. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>26 September 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

O Mother, I want to act according to Your will and nothing else. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Then quickly leave the path you have taken
\n\u2014 do not waste your time wandering about and talking to girls. Start working in
\nearnest again, study, educate yourself. occupy your mind with interesting and
\nuseful things rather than useless chit-chat, and do not give false excuses for
\nyour vital attractions. If your wish is truly sincere, you may be sure that you
\nwill have my force to help you to conquer. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>27 September 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

When will my being, which has gone astray, return to the path
\nleading straight to You? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Nothing could be easier \u2014 you have only to
\ndecide resolutely that you want nothing but the divine life and turn away from
\neverything else. You are sure to find me immediately. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>29 September 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Because my nature is weak, it becomes difficult to renounce
\nordinary things. But it is sure that I want only You; if You are not there
\ndeath and nothing else. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

There is no question of dying. Leaving
\nyour body is not a solution; you remain with your desires and it is worse. It
\nis <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 62<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

much more reasonable and true to let your
\ndesires die, understanding how useless and stupid they are. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>Since
\nyou want the Divine Life so much, you need not be afraid of failure, for a
\nsincere and sustained aspiration is always fulfilled. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>Make
\na firm resolution to overcome your weaknesses and you will see that it is not
\nso difficult as it seems. My force is with you to overcome the obstacles, and
\nalso my blessings. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>29 September 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Today I did not study. I still have a headache. I often lose
\ncourage and wish that the Sudarshan<\/span> Chakra\u00b9 would
\ncome and put me to sleep for ever. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

To have so little courage at your \u2014 age it
\nis shameful! <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>Rest
\nif you are tired, but never lose the will for victory. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>13 October 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I am very much interested in writing and reading stories. Then I
\nforget the pain. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Which proves that your pain is at least
\nthree-fourths imaginary. <\/span><\/p>\n


\n<\/font>
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

So the only question about continuing to write or read like this,
\nif You approve, is that of time \u2014 writing stories takes a lot of time. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I see no harm in your reading and telling
\nstories, but it should not interfere with your studies. Besides, to develop
\nyour style you can very well write any stories you please. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 October 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n


\n\u00b9The lethal
\nweapon of Sri Krishna.<\/font><\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 63<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

O Mother, make me understand this imaginary illness. I don\u2019t understand
\nit at all. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You think that you are ill and that
\nincreases the illness. When you forget the illness, it goes away almost
\ncompletely. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 October 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

This morning X offered me some betel. I told her that Mother
\nforbids it. \u201cNo, one can take it sometimes,\u201d she said; \u201cthen you can wash your
\nmouth before going to pranam<\/span>.\u201d <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

What hypocrisy!! IT IS SHAMEFUL.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

O Mother, how can one hope for Your love with such open
\ndisobedience! Why press others to act against Your will? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, it is very base. It is because of
\nsuch actions, constantly repeated, that these people never make any progress. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>16 October 1934 <\/span><\/i>
\n <\/font><\/span><\/p>\n


\nI
\nthink that illnesses of the physical body are mostly imaginary. So if one
\nalways remained outside the body, as one does during sleep, probably one would
\nnever feel ill. It is only a matter of remaining outside the body. <\/span>
\n<\/font> <\/i><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\nIt is not remaining outside the body that cures illness. it is
\nthinking in the true way and refusing everything in one’s thought that could
\ngive support to the illness. <\/span><\/font> <\/p>\n


\n\u00a0<\/font><\/span>18 October 1934<\/font><\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 64<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

My mind is busy from time to time with the story I have started
\nwriting. But is it good for it to be occupied in this way? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is better for it to be occupied with
\nthat, if your story is interesting<\/i>,
\nthan with flirtation or nonsense. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>20 October 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

O Mother, why don\u2019t I feel Your love? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Because you are looking for it in the
\nwrong place, or under a false form. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I feel that I am alone, wandering here and there. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The vital must have decided that my love
\nwould express itself in a particular way, and as it did not happen that way,
\nthe vital says, \u201cThere is no love!\u201d <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>20 October 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

I think, Mother, that there are three states of consciousness for
\nfeeling Your love. In the first, a man is only an ordinary human being and feels
\nnothing whether he sees You or not. In the second, he feels something if he
\ndoes not see You for a long time. In the third, he does not need Your physical
\nbody \u2014 in the extreme fire of love Your body and his physical body are
\ndissolved in a soul-communion. I think, Mother, that man does not need Your
\nphysical body, since You are already in his heart. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

That is not quite true. If there were not
\nsomething more in the physical contact than in the inner contact, there would
\nhave been no reason for me to take a body upon earth. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 October 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 65<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

You wrote to me: \u201cMaking an effort consists in refusing to do
\nanything that leads you away from the Divine.\u201d I have thought about this, but I
\ndon\u2019t understand it. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Every time I answer one of your questions,
\nyou tell me that you don\u2019t understand my reply. What to do? You must learn to
\nreflect a little and enter into a deeper kind of thought. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>Y\u00b9
\nhas just written to me about the great number of novels you read. I do not
\nthink that this kind of reading is good for you \u2014 and if it is to study style,
\nas you told me, an attentive study of one good book by a good author, done
\ncarefully, teaches much more than this hasty and superficial reading. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>25 October 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

O Mother, what shall I do? I try to understand but I don\u2019t
\nsucceed. It is the same with my studies. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is because your mind has not been
\nsufficiently trained in the discipline of study.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I had two reasons for reading novels, to learn words and style. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

In order to learn you must read with great
\ncare and carefully choose what you read. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>25 October 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Mother, what is this discipline I must learn in order to
\nunderstand better? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The discipline of intellectual study as it
\nis practised in colleges in France. You can talk to Z about it; he will explain
\nit to you. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n


\n\u00b9The Ashram
\nlibrarian.<\/font><\/span> <\/font><\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 66<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

There is a good writer in Gujarati \u2014 I could study his books. X
\ntold me that his style is like Anatole<\/span> France\u2019s. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Really! If he writes like Anatole<\/span> France he must truly be a marvellous writer! <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>26 October 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Since my illness was imaginary, it is beyond my mental capacities
\nto understand why You gave me permission to take Sudarshan.\u00b9 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Because your body did not know that the
\nillness was imaginary, and it needed a remedy in order to believe in the
\npossibility of being cured. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>26 October 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Is it good to be \u201cobliging\u201d or to help other people?<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is certainly better to be obliging than
\nto be intensely selfish. But even in being obliging one should observe
\nmoderation.  <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

At the moment there is not a single psychic element in my
\nactivity. O Mother, let nothing in me consent to lower activities. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, you must never yield to the lower nature,
\nnot only when it manifests in you but also when it manifests in others. Never
\nlisten to bad advice, never follow bad examples, never accept any other
\ninfluence than that of the Divine, and your uneasiness will disappear. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>30 October 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n


\n\u00b9An Ayurvedic<\/span> medicine.<\/font><\/span> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 67<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

X is the only one who gives me advice and sets an example and I am
\nunder his influence. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It makes little difference from whom the
\ninfluence comes; do not accept it. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

This morning X asked me to tell him whenever I feel depressed. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I see no use in speaking about your
\ndepressions to other people. It can help neither you nor them. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>30 October 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

O Mother, what should I do? I am completely unconscious. Mother,
\nwhere are You? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

In your psychic being \u2014 I am always present
\nthere. It is there that you can find me and must find me, and when you have
\nfound me there, in the depths of your heart, you will also recognise me in my
\nphysical form. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>31 October 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

But how can I enter the psychic centre when there is a black veil
\nbetween the psychic and the integral being? (The Mother substituted the word
\n\u201cexternal\u201d for \u201cintegral\u201d and commented \ud83d\ude42 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Integral <\/span><\/i>means complete, entire, omitting nothing, total the external being
\nis very far from being integral. When we speak of \u201cthe integral being\u201d, we mean
\nthe being in its totality, from the physical body to the true Self, the Divine
\nConsciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>31 October 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 68<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

You write \u201cthe true Self, the Divine Consciousness\u201d does that mean
\nthe true soul, the psychic? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

No, it is not the same thing. In several
\nof his messages Sri Aurobindo<\/span> has explained the
\ndifference between the psychic being, which is the divine element in man, and
\nthe states of being that belong to the overhead regions. Study Sri Aurobindo\u2019s<\/span> messages and books a little (instead of reading
\nnovels) \u2014 then you won\u2019t ask me unnecessary questions. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>1 November 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Of course, it is natural that I am very far away from You. First I
\nmust have a true attitude towards You and a perfect opening \u2014 which I lack. O
\nMother, where are You, and where am I? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You are not so far from me as you think.
\nYou have only to calm the agitation of your mind and vital a little, remain a
\nbit quiet and concentrated, and at once you will find my presence within you
\nand around you. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>1 November 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Do You think I should stop reading Gujarati literature? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It all depends on the effect that this
\nliterature has on your imagination. If it fills your head with undesirable
\nideas and your vital with desires, it is certainly better to stop reading this
\nkind of books. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>2 November 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Even when one is identified with You, is it true that one can do
\nactions that are not consecrated to You?<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 69<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

No, after identification it is impossible.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>2 November 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n


\nO Mother, I want to identify myself with
\nYou in such a way that I shall see You in every action. <\/i><\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It would be more correct to say that you
\nwould be able to act only according to my will. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>3 November 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Mother, I have been searching for You since yesterday evening, but
\nI do not find You and I feel alone, without support. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

All these are false imaginations. If you
\ntold yourself, on the contrary, that I am always with you (which is true), it
\nwould help you to become conscious of my presence. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>9 November 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

O Mother, I am sad now because I don\u2019t believe what You tell me.
\nBut what can I do, the thing is not clear to me. This shows that I have no
\nfaith in You. Of course, I still have many things to learn. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You have everything<\/i>, absolutely everything still to learn. Above all you
\nhave to educate a mind that is still raw, ignorant and obscure, and has all the
\nimpudence of ignorance. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

O Thou, whom we must know, understand, realise\u2026<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The first thing you must do is to learn a
\nlittle humility and to recognise that you know nothing <\/i>\u2014 you read words, you read prayers,
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 70<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

\nand you repeat the words, you
\ncopy the prayers, but you do not
\nunderstand them<\/i>; you mix up all these ideas and notions in a brain that is still
\nlike a child\u2019s, and then you have the illusion of understanding! <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 November 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

On the days when I do not study, I feel uneasy. But when I begin
\nto study, happiness comes. I don\u2019t understand this process. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

What do you mean by process? It is not a
\nprocess; the disappearance of the uneasiness is the very natural result of
\nconcentrating the mind on study, which on the one hand provides it with a
\nhealthy activity, and on the other draws its attention away from this morbid
\ncontemplation of the little physical ego. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>3 December 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

O Mother, where are the joy and the love that filled my whole
\nbeing last night during meditation? I have never known how to receive and keep
\nwhat You give me.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You know how to receive, since you feel
\nthe presence of love and joy, but you do not seem to know how to keep them. You
\nmust learn to treasure in yourself silently what you have received. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 December 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Please explain to me how I lose what I receive. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

By dissipation \u2014 by throwing out, either
\nin thoughts, words or actions, the force and energy you have received. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 December 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 71<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I have the idea that the divine peace will not reign over the
\nwhole of the earth. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

What do you know about it? Can your mind have
\nany knowledge of the future? And especially the supramental<\/span>
\nfuture! <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>7 December 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

This morning I told Y that Mother had told me that She does not
\nknow what will happen to this Ashram in the future. \u201cHow is it possible?\u201d he said,
\n\u201cI cannot believe that She knows nothing about the work for which she has taken
\na body on earth.\u201d <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I do not think that I said any such thing.
\nYou must have misunderstood me. But Y is wrong to believe that I came upon
\nearth to establish an Ashram! That would really be a very paltry objective. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>8 December 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Mother, will You explain how looking at pictures can be harmful?<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Naturally it depends on what the pictures
\nare; but most often they are concerned only with things of the ordinary life
\nand so they draw the consciousness towards that. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>10 December 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

O Mother, my sweet Mother, when shall I become one with You, when
\nshall I live in You and for You? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You must will with persistence, but not get
\nimpatient. Through calm determination you will achieve it more quickly.<\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 72<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

 By getting restless, one wastes more time than one
\nsaves. <\/span>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>13 December 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Mother, is it good to go to Z\u2019s house to read the poems he has
\nwritten in Gujarati? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It all depends on the effect it has on
\nyou. If you come away feeling more peaceful and content, it is all right. If,
\non the contrary, it makes you feel melancholy and dissatisfied, it would be
\nbetter not to go there. You have only to observe and see how it affects you,
\nthen decide accordingly. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>13 December 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

May I know, Mother, the conditions for the Supermind<\/span>
\nto descend in me? When I heard that the Supermind<\/span>
\nwould descend in a relatively short time, I felt extremely happy. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is better not to speak of these things.
\nAll sincere spiritual effort towards an increase of consciousness is a
\npreparation. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 December 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Will You explain why the joy and love in me get attacked by obscurity?
\nI am not aware of having done anything, and it is not possible for the
\nhappiness and love to withdraw for no reason. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

No, nothing withdraws; it is the physical
\nbeing which is unable, by nature, to hold the joy and love for very long,
\nunless it is completely governed by the psychic. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is only after getting up that my condition changes.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 73<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Yes, it is particularly at night that the
\nphysical being falls into obscurity and unconsciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t understand why, just after so much happiness, so much
\ndisturbance comes. This is not the first time it has happened. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The movements of consciousness are like a
\npendulum. The more it swings in one direction, the more it swings back in the
\nopposite direction. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>19 December 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

By what signs can one tell that the psychic being has come to the
\nsurface? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

One feels peaceful and happy, full of
\ntrust, full of a deep and true benevolence, and very close to the divine
\npresence. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>20 December 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

In my dream I saw that You had written, \u201cMy dear child, why have
\nyou stopped studying?\u201d You had written much more, and I would like You to write
\nit here, if possible. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, last night I asked you why you had
\nnot studied, and I said that to yield like that to the impulses of the vital
\nwas certainly not the way to control it. You must create a discipline for
\nyourself and impose it on yourself at all costs if you want to put an end to
\nvital bad will and mental depression. Without discipline one can do nothing in
\nlife, and all yoga is impossible. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>22 December 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 74<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

For physical work it is not difficult to follow the discipline,
\nbut for study it becomes difficult when I feel disturbed. All the same, I have
\ndecided that on the days when I do not study, I will not eat my lunch. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

What a funny idea! To punish your body for
\na fault that the vital has committed! It is not fair. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>22 December 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

X told me that for the last few days everything has been done
\naccording to Your will. But I think just the opposite \u2014 that very few things
\nare done according to Your divine law. (I didn\u2019t tell him that.) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You were right not to tell him; but it is
\nquite true that in this world very little is done according to the divine will.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>27 December 1934 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Tell me, Mother, what am I? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Outwardly, you are an unconscious child
\nstriving to become conscious.<\/span><\/p>\n

Inwardly, you are an eternal soul
\nattempting to manifest in a body. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>7 January 1935 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

I thought that the soul was always in the body, that there would
\nbe no existence without its presence. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Certainly the soul is in the body, but it
\nis not manifested} its presence is not evident and has very little effect on
\nthe life of the body.  <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 75<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Which part of the being aspires for love, for peace? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is that part on any plane (physical,
\nvital or mental) which is open to the psychic influence. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>7 January 1935 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

May I know, Mother, how many centuries ago You descended upon
\nearth? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I have never left the earth since it was
\nformed. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>10 January 1935 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

It is said that Krishna, Buddha and Jesus Christ were Avatars. So
\nweren\u2019t these people yourself? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Krishna was an Avatar, but Buddha and
\nChrist were only emanations. As for the second part of your question, I have no
\nidea what you mean. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>11 January 1935<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

I would like to know exactly what You mean by remaining calm. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It means not to get agitated \u2014 I mean
\nabove all psychologically}, in your feelings and thoughts. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>14 January 1935<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

How does one change the sex-centre and its energy into a mass and
\na movement of the inner Light, into a creative power, into a pure divine Ananda<\/span>? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

By the gradual infusion of light into the
\ncentre. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 January 1935<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 76<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I nearly always feel upset or depressed, and I am afraid of
\ndisturbing other people. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

That is a very laudable sentiment \u2014 but
\nthe best thing would be to get yourself out of the depression so that there
\nwon\u2019t be any risk of passing it on to others. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>16 January 1935 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Just this morning there is a very big depression, so it is
\nbecoming impossible to study. O Mother, what shall I do? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Force yourself to study and your
\ndepression will go away. Can you imagine a student in college coming and
\ntelling his teacher, \u201cSir, I didn\u2019t do my homework today because I felt
\ndepressed\u201d? <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>Surely
\nthe teacher would punish him most severely. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>16 January 1935<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

My being is falling into a lower and lower state of consciousness.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Don\u2019t you find that you are thinking a bit
\ntoo much about yourself? You remind me of a hypochondriac always feeling his pulse
\nto see whether he has a temperature. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>17 January 1935<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Certainly I think too much about my own movements. In the future I
\nwill inform You about a movement only once. But it won\u2019t be easy for me not to
\nthink about it. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It won\u2019t help at all not to inform me if
\nyou go on thinking about it.
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 77<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

\nOn the contrary, if you tell me about
\nit, I can help you more easily. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 January 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Is it true that at one time the Divine ruled everywhere \u2014 the \u201cSatyayuga<\/span>\u201d? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Certainly not on earth. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Does the soul never come to an end? Must it always take a body? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Not necessarily; but the soul needs to
\nhave achieved a very high degree of
\nperfection <\/i>before it has the power to choose whether to return to the
\nphysical life or to rest outside the manifestation. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 January 1935 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

I thought that the soul was perfect in its nature. I don\u2019t
\nunderstand \u201cthe ascension of the soul towards the truth from which it springs\u201d.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The essence of the soul is divine, but the
\nsoul (the psychic being) grows through all the forms of evolution; it becomes
\nmore and more individualised and increasingly conscious of itself and its
\norigin. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 January 1935 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

I think that Your action changes according to my state of
\nconsciousness. I see a great difference when I am in a good mood and when I am
\ndepressed.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 78<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

It is not my action that changes, but your
\nway of seeing it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>25 January 1935 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

I think that You do not like it very much when I do not apply
\nmyself to my studies. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Studies strengthen the mind and turn its
\nconcentration away from the impulses and desires of the vital. Concentrating on
\nstudy is one of the most powerful ways of controlling the mind and the vital;
\nthat is why it is so important to study. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>28 January 1935 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Something in me likes to help other people. But it is not
\ndesirable. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is the sign of a very good nature, but
\nto be able to do it safely one needs to have complete control over oneself. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>30 January 1935 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

There is so much to be done, and I am wasting my time in vain.
\nWhen will my actions be in harmony with You, Mother?<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is a matter of will. You must cultivate
\nand strengthen your will \u2014 then your time will no longer be wasted in vain. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>30 January 1935 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

My mind does not become peaceful, I think, because I do not study
\nhard enough. Studying does not give me much pleasure. <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 79<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

One does not study for the sake of
\npleasure \u2014 one studies in order to learn and to develop one\u2019s brain. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>1 February 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

When You were small, in Your childhood, did you know that You were
\nthe incarnate Divine? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I was conscious. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>2 February 1935<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

I usually become aware of a movement only after doing the action.
\nIf I waited just a minute before acting, I could avoid these wrong movements. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, it is very good to learn the habit of
\npausing a few seconds before acting in order to ask oneself whether the action
\nis truly helpful from the standpoint of spiritual life. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 February 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

It is said that knowledge is already within us, but I think that
\nknowledge is received by the soul and transmitted to the mind and vital. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I see no contradiction in these ideas. The
\nTruth is received by the psychic, which transmits it to the mind and vital. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>6 February 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cThe psychic is not, by definition, that part which is in direct
\ntouch with the supramental<\/span> plane.\u2026The psychic part of
\nus is something that comes direct from the Divine and is in touch with the
\nDivine.\u201d (Sri Aurobindo<\/span>)<\/span><\/i> <\/span>I don\u2019t know the difference between the Supermind<\/span>
\nand the Divine. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 80<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

 The Divine spoken of here is that which
\nhas been in contact with the earth from the beginning of time; the Supermind<\/span> is a new aspect of the Divine, which up to now
\nhas not been manifested upon earth. <\/span><\/p>\n

7 February 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What fun life is! It is fun to see the soul in evolution.
\nEverything is interesting. Who feels like this the mind? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, it is the mind, but with a first
\ninfluence of the flame of Agni<\/span>. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>8 February 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

How can the human mind say that it is fun to see the soul
\ndeveloping, when the soul is above the mind? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

When the mind says this, it is referring
\nto the vital soul, because that is what develops in life. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Mother, I would like to know something about this flame of Agni<\/span>. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is the flame of purification, the will
\nfor progress.82<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>9 February 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What You mean by \u201cvital soul\u201d is the vital being, I think. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The vital soul is what the ancients called
\nthe \u201canima\u201d, that which animates, gives life to the body. It
\nis also sometimes called the etheric<\/span> being. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>11 February 1935<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 81<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

The inner development is the most important thing, for through
\nthat we receive Your love and peace, not through any outer thing. The joy that
\ncomes through outer things, through Your outer actions, is not of divine or
\nspiritual origin. The proof of this is that when Your actions change we feel
\nupset. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Absurd!!!! <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>You
\nare mixing up two different things. I can assure you that my action, whether
\ninner or outer, is always of divine origin}. The disturbance you feel is not
\nproof of a lack of divinity in the action, but of a lack of plasticity and
\nreceptivity in your mind, your vital and your physical. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I think it is the physical consciousness that is active now and finding
\nfault with You. The disturbance is still \u2014 there I don\u2019t know how to shake it
\noff. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The only way to save yourself from these
\ndisturbances is through true humility \u2014 the humility that consists in knowing
\nthat at the moment you are utterly incapable of understanding me and that it is
\npresumptuous stupidity to try to judge me. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>13 February 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I am completely ignorant, totally lacking in consciousness \u2014 so in
\nthis condition how can I understand and judge You!<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Do not get upset \u2014 keep calm. Certainly
\nthe part of you that is speaking now has never tried to judge me.
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 82<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

\nIt is in calm that one can unify one\u2019s being around the highest aspiration. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>14 February 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I would like to know which parts try to judge You. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

A part of the physical mind and the most
\nmaterial vital. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 February 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

O Mother, when will I become humble? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It will come soon, I think, since you have
\nrecognised your mistake. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 February 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I would like to know what You mean by \u201cthe most material vital\u201d. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is the part of the vital that is
\nclosest to the physical consciousness, the part that gives life to the body. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>16 February 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Is it desirable to talk with Y about Yoga? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I do not think that it is good for you to
\ntalk to people about Yoga in this way \u2014 it gives you the illusion that you have
\nsomething to teach them and it does not foster humility in you. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 February 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

It is quite impossible for me to study, because inertia is there.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 83<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

If you do not study, the inertia will go
\non increasing. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 March 1935<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

What is meant by \u201cbeauty\u201d in \u201cto bring the Divine Love and Beauty
\nand Ananda<\/span>\u201d? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

There is a beauty on every plane of the being
\nright up to the Divine himself. Material beauty is but a very poor translation
\nof that beauty. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>5 March 1935 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Isn\u2019t it undesirable if Y sometimes talks to me about his sadhana<\/span>? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

As long as you do not give him any advice,
\nit does not matter much. As a general rule, however, the less one speaks about sadhana<\/span> the better. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>6 March 1935 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Is it possible to progress without encountering obstacles and
\ndifficulties? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

No. Difficulties do arise, but there is no
\nreason for them to cause depression. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>8 March 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

How can I prevent difficulties from causing depression? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Become conscious. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

What is meant by the yogic term \u201cthrough the heart\u201d? Is it the
\nhigher vital?<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 84<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Yes, the emotional being. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Isn\u2019t it possible to overcome a difficulty without any lowering of
\nthe consciousness? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Certainly \u2014 in fact it is impossible to
\novercome a difficulty if the consciousness gets lowered. On the contrary, in
\norder to overcome difficulties, the consciousness must strive to rise above its
\nordinary level. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>9 March 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cWhen the central being has surrendered, the principal difficulty
\nhas disappeared.\u201d What is this central being? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The central being is not the same in
\neveryone \u2014 it is the part that governs the rest of the personality and imposes
\nits will on it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>When
\nthe psychic being holds this central position in the personality, everything
\nbecomes very easy. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>14 March 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Now the vital must become well-behaved. I hope that I will be able
\nto do it with Your help. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, surely you will be able to do it. The
\npart that has goodwill must grow stronger until it has the power to control the
\nrecalcitrant part and force it to be converted. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>16 March 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I see that mental preparation helps a great deal.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 85<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Yes, it is very useful when it is properly
\ndone. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

What is the difference between the voice of the mental Purusha<\/span> and the voice that comes from the depths of the
\nheart, the psychic voice? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The psychic voice is silent \u2014 it manifests
\nin the form of an understanding or knowledge rather than in words. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>17 March 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Isn\u2019t there any difference between the effect of the psychic voice
\nand the voice of the mental Purusha<\/span>? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, there is a great difference. It is much
\nmore difficult to hear the psychic message than the voice of the mental Purusha<\/span> \u2014 the latter is not infallible and is liable to
\nerr. The psychic never errs. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Why isn\u2019t my vital controlled by the vital Purusha<\/span>?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The vital Purusha<\/span>
\nawakens only when all the desires are mastered and the vital being is calm. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Where did the love and peace that I used to feel come from, since
\nmy heart was always closed? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Your heart is not always closed. When it
\nopens, the peace and love enter into you. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 March 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

When can one hear the psychic message? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

When one is very silent and attentive. <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 86<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

My mind is still ignorant and totally lacking in calm so how did
\nthe mental Purusha<\/span> awaken? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The mental Purusha<\/span>
\nis always more or less awake in those who are in the habit of observing
\nthemselves. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I think that the love and peace which come by the opening of the
\nheart are psychic and unmixed. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Not necessarily; even if they come from
\nthe psychic, they may get mixed with other less elevated movements when they
\nmanifest in the mind or the vital. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>Love
\nand peace can also come from above, directly from divine regions. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>19 March 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Is there any difference between the psychic voice and the voice of
\nthe Divine? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

One can hardly say that the Divine
\nexpresses himself through a voice<\/i>,
\nbut rather by imparting a certain state of consciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

When can the physical Purusha<\/span> awaken and
\ncontrol the physical being? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

When the Light has descended into the
\nphysical consciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Can\u2019t the love and peace that come from above get distorted when
\nthey enter the mind and vital? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Indeed they very often are; the love gets
\nchanged into a kind of passion and the peace into inertia.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

What must I do to stop my heart from closing again and to keep it
\nalways open?<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 87<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

You must will for it persistently and one
\nday it will happen. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>20 March 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Are there any other Purushas<\/span> besides the
\nmental, the vital and the physical? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The psychic. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>21 March 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Z told me not to open my fountain-pen, but as the ink wouldn\u2019t
\nflow, I half-opened it, and an accident happened. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You were wrong to open your pen when you
\nwere told not to because it is I myself who said that if anyone tampered with
\nhis pen it would not be repaired for him. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>I
\nwill have it repaired this time, if possible, but you must promise me never to
\ntouch it again. <\/span><\/p>\n


\n<\/font>
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t feel anything when I break or lose a material object. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is a fault. Not to take care of the material
\nobjects one uses is a sign of unconsciousness and ignorance. One has no right
\nto use any material object unless one takes care of it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 March 1935 <\/span> <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Now I understand that there is something of the Divine even in
\nmaterial things. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, and we must take care of them, not
\nbecause we are attached to them, but because they too manifest something of the
\nDivine Consciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 88<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I would like to know by what signs one can tell that the heart is
\nfully open. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is something one feels and there can be
\nno doubt about it when it happens to you. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Opening the heart means bringing the psychic to the surface? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The psychic coming to the surface is the
\nresult rather than the method. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>25 March 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Today I feel as if the whole world were at rest; everything is
\ncalm, and alien to me too. I am a stranger in this world. I don\u2019t know if I
\nhave described the experience correctly. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I understand very well what you mean. It
\nis an experience that takes place when one enters into a new field of
\nconsciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If it is a good experience, I don\u2019t understand why I don\u2019t feel
\nYour love and happiness. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Happiness and love do not accompany all
\nexperiences. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Instead, I find that there is an active concentration. I often feel
\na pressure in the heart-centre. But why can\u2019t there be a little happiness and
\nlove too? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The experience is only one of an awakening
\nof consciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>27 March 1935<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 89<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

All will be You, nothing but You; I shall become You and You alone
\nwill exist. I don\u2019t know if I am exaggerating. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is up to you to make true in practice
\nthe ideal that your mind sets before you. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yesterday I wrote that there was a deep calm \u2014 but today there is
\nonly a deep disturbance! <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

There is at the same time a part of the
\nbeing that lives in light and joy, and a part that lives in disturbance and
\nobscurity. If you turn your attention towards the disturbance, you feel it. But
\nif you turn your attention towards the light and joy, you live in them. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>2 April 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

In fact, I attributed the cold to my disturbance, which always
\npulls down the consciousness. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is also a resistance in the brain,
\nexpressing those elements of the physical mind that refuse to be transformed. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>6 April 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I think that one gets the psychic consciousness only when the
\npsychic comes to the surface. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Or when one can go deep enough inside to
\nenter into contact with one\u2019s psychic being. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

So what should I do about the resistance of the physical mind? It
\nis preventing me from studying and giving me constant trouble.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 90<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

First you must detach yourself from it,
\nstop identifying yourself with its movements.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Would You tell me something about the obscure parts of the vital?
\nI don\u2019t understand how they pull my consciousness down and I don\u2019t see how they
\nact on the material plane. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

They are connected with the material plane
\nthrough the sense-organs (sight, hearing, etc.). <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>8 April 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

How can one conquer the subconscious? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

By entering into it step by step, through
\nattentive observation, with the light of the consciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Why am I on earth in ignorance and obscurity? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The mind cannot answer these questions nor
\nunderstand the true reply. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>9 April 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t know how to spend my time, since I understand nothing. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Study, that is the best way to understand.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You tell me to study, but I dislike studying. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You don\u2019t give enough time to study; that
\nis why it doesn\u2019t interest you. Everything one does with care necessarily
\nbecomes interesting. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>10 April 1935<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 91<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I wish to have a consciousness that would prevent me from behaving
\nbadly. I think that only the psychic consciousness can do that. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Failing the psychic, the enlightened mind
\ncan prevent the vital from behaving foolishly. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 April 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

My cold goes on and on. Something has to be done about this
\ndisharmony. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The only unfailing method for getting rid
\nof illnesses is to turn one\u2019s attention away from them and refuse to give them
\nany importance. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>16 April 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Why doesn\u2019t the spiritual consciousness remain all the time? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Because the ordinary consciousness drives
\nit away. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>19 April 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What must one do so that nothing drives away the spiritual
\nconsciousness? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Remember it always and in all
\ncircumstances. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>20 April 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Do you think that a pure love between human beings is possible? <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 92<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I do not have much faith in pure love}
\nbetween human beings. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>21 April 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What does \u201cspiritual consciousness\u201d mean? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Generally speaking, it is the
\nconsciousness that is turned towards the Divine. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>22 April 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t understand why men want help from other imperfect beings. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

They understand them better, because they
\nare closer to them. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 April 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

My last few nights have been very restless. When I wake up in the
\nmorning I feel tired! How much longer will this go on? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Getting upset and impatient certainly will
\nnot help this bad period to end any sooner. On the other hand, if you can
\nmaintain a little inner calm, you will get out of your difficulties more
\nquickly. It is only in a state of calm that one can enter into contact with
\none\u2019s psychic consciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Will my life always be as it is now? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I hope not! But if you could be a little
\nmore peaceful within, your troubles would end more quickly. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 April 1935<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 93<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Now I long with all my soul to be Your child. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You are my child; you have only to become
\nconscious of it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>25 April 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

When will men have the right attitude towards the Truth? When will
\nthey stop wandering about in vain, wasting their energy in useless struggles?
\nWhy don\u2019t they understand? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Because they are still mentally immature. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>30 April 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I have not yet got rid of my affinity for other people. Please tell
\nme how to do that. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Affinities are almost instinctive and not
\nvery important. Only you must be careful that they do not become attachments. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

One begins to do yoga only when one has realised one\u2019s soul. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

These things are not so clear-cut and one
\nmay have started doing yoga in one part of the being even while the rest \u2014 the
\nother parts of the being \u2014 still refuse to be transformed. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>2 May 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

You say that people fall into an ordinary consciousness when they
\ncome into contact with each other, so what should I do to remain in my central
\nconsciousness?<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 94<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Never forget the divine presence. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 May 1935<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

X says that You change according to her condition. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

No, I do not change towards people
\naccording to their condition. It is their impression of me that changes according
\nto their mood at the moment. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 May 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I would like to know about my present state of consciousness
\nbecause I feel that everything in me is at peace. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

To be at peace is a good thing. Do not
\nrisk spoiling the peace by talking about this state. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 May 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Of course, in a general way, You are always with us, but what I
\nwant is to be conscious of Your presence. If You were with me, I wouldn\u2019t get
\nrebellious and I would feel Your love and peace in spite of this dark turmoil. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is the desire and rebellion that
\nprevent your vital from feeling the Presence, but the fact that you do not feel
\nit is no proof that it is not there. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>8 May 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Perhaps my way of helping is not really good.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 95<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I do not think it is bad either \u2014 but of
\ncourse it is proportionate to the consciousness you possess. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I would like to know how to prevent any outside force from
\nentering in when we have a good experience. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

An undesirable outside force does not always
\nenter into us each time that we have a good experience. On the contrary, the
\ngood experience ought to give us the strength to repel the outside force when
\nit tries to enter. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>10 May 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t understand what is gained by telling lies. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Nothing is gained by lying, of course; on
\nthe contrary, one darkens one\u2019s consciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>12 May 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I cannot see the superhuman, spiritual, divine life anywhere, and
\nwithout the divine life everything is meaningless for me. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If your consciousness were superhuman,
\ndivine, or even spiritual, you would see that same consciousness everywhere. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>13 May 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

For the time being, may I stop thinking about sadhana<\/span>?
\nI can\u2019t find any other way of getting inner peace. I am continuing my
\naspiration for the opening of the heart. But I see that it is not so easy to
\nobtain the psychic consciousness \u2014 it requires a patient concentration.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 96<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

It is certainly not sadhana<\/span>
\nthat stands in the way of inner peace \u2014 on the contrary, for the sadhana<\/span> is based entirely on this inner peace, which is the
\nessential condition for progress. To enter into contact with the psychic
\nconsciousness, a patient concentration is indeed necessary. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>14 May 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

By Your will, I will give French lessons to Y. I will go to her place
\nfor that. But I would like to know why she should not come to my place. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

First of all, as a general rule, it is
\nbetter if women do not visit the rooms of men. In this particular case, if she
\ncame to your room, I am afraid she would leave behind an atmosphere that would
\nbe very disturbing to your peace of mind. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 May 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t understand why the darkness comes so often and stays so
\nlong. Have I become worse than before? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n


\n<\/font>
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

No, you have become more conscious. Before
\nthere was even more darkness, but you were not aware of it. You did not
\nperceive it as darkness. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I have no peace, no love, no energy for work. What stage am I
\ngoing through at the moment? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

A transition period in which you have
\nbecome more conscious but have not yet gained control. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

In what part does this darkness lie and how long will it remain
\nthere?<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 97<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Especially in the physical consciousness \u2014
\nuntil the physical gets illumined. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>17 May 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

So what must I do to get the physical illumined, as well as the
\nvital, which is also dark and obscure, I suppose?<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Always choose the light instead of the
\ndarkness. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 May 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Darkness, darkness, vanish away! O Mother, are You not here? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I am here and I am concentrating upon you all
\nthe light needed to dissolve any darkness whatever. It is up to you to receive
\nit. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 May 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Which path must I take then? And what is the right and true way of
\nmaking the effort? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Do what I explained to you yesterday \u2014
\nmake your brain work by studying regularly and systematically; then during the
\nhours when you are not studying, your brain, having worked enough, will be able
\nto rest and it will be possible for you to concentrate in the depths of your
\nheart and find there the psychic source; with it you will become conscious both
\nof gratitude and true happiness. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 May 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Despite my disturbances and depressions, I will do my best to
\nprogress in my studies. But it will only be possible with the constant help of
\nYour force.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 98<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

My force and my help are constantly with
\nyou and my consciousness is enlightening you as you study. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Z told me that she felt a great depression after pranam<\/span> and wept bitterly. She would like to know the cause
\nof this movement.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

She must have come to me with some desire,
\nand her desire, sensing that it would not be satisfied, made her sad and
\ndepressed. It is more or less what happens to you too. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 May 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Now I know why the darkness always returns
\nto you, even after I have driven it away. It is because the sense of gratitude
\nhas not yet awakened in you. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 May 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I think that some element in me does not believe in the divine
\nGrace: that is what prevents the gratitude. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Obviously. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

At first I used to feel so much love for You, but now my love has
\nbecome more selfish. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, that is it; you began to bargain in
\nyour giving and that has dried up the source. If, however, you resolve not to
\ndemand anything in return for what you give, you will soon rediscover the
\nincomparable joy of loving. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 May 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Is it possible to be near to You with a selfish love?<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 99<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Until the nature is entirely transformed,
\nit is always mixed the good and the bad side by side. So until the transformation
\nis achieved, there will always be a mixture of egoism in all who come to me. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I am aware of all my wrong actions, but unfortunately\u00a0 <\/span>I am not able to control them. That is what
\nmakes me sad. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Do not worry \u2014 have trust; it is this lack
\nof trust that veils your consciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Teach me, Mother, how to make my love pure and psychic. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Do not think about yourself. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>25 May 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Allow me to observe silence, let me go into solitude. <\/span><\/i><\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Observe silence in your mind, go into the solitude
\nof your psychic being and you will find me there. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>27 May 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

You tell me to observe silence and to go into the solitude of my
\npsychic being, but how can I do that? Only You can put me in that state. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

This is a completely tamasic<\/span>
\nreply. My consciousness is always at work, but you on your side must exert your will and make an effort. <\/i><\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>28 May 1935 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 100<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I feel that it is necessary to go into solitude \u2014 I am living only
\nin my outer being. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Certainly you are living mainly in your
\nmind, vital and physical. A little concentration would do you no harm, but you
\nmust not overdo it. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Teach me how to make an effort to find You. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You must exert your will. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>28 May 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I feel that in solitude I could remain more open and receptive. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If by solitude you mean not seeing people
\nany more than is indispensable and not speaking with them unless it is
\nabsolutely necessary, then we are agreed. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>30 May 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Remove all this misery from me and raise me above ignorance and
\nfalsehood. O Mother, hasn\u2019t enough time passed? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

My dear child, I am only too willing to
\nhelp you out of this absurd unhappiness, but I am afraid that it comes only
\nfrom thwarted desires \u2014 and in that case you must first renounce those desires
\nand ambitions. But you can be sure that my help is always with you. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>30 May 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I think I should remain some distance away from You physically
\nuntil there is no demand left in me.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 101<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

This is a hostile suggestion which is
\ncompletely false and you must immediately reject it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>1 June 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Nowhere in this world can I find a quiet and peaceful life. And
\nyet a part of my being enjoys the evolution of the world. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Certainly a part of your being is in
\nharmony with the psychic life of the universe. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 June 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What do you mean by \u201cthe psychic life of the world\u201d? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Just as there is a psychic life in human
\nbeings, there is a psychic life in the earth and doubtless in other worlds too.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Then what is the goal of life on earth? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

To make the consciousness progress towards
\nthe Divine. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>5 June 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Turn my consciousness towards You, Mother. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Never doubt my love, and then quite
\nnaturally you will turn towards me. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>10 June 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

If I get the psychic consciousness, all these difficulties will no
\nlonger exist.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 102<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Certainly the psychic consciousness has
\nnone of these difficulties; it has the constant experience of my presence and
\nmy love. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>10 June 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Yesterday I made a great effort to get back into the light and
\njoy, but I failed. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is very good that you made an effort,
\nbut you must not get discouraged so quickly, just because you fail to succeed
\nimmediately. On the contrary, you must persevere in your effort until you do
\nsucceed. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

My help will always be with you. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>11 June 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

But how can I get this psychic consciousness? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

By aspiration, prayer and concentration. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Perhaps my aspiration is not intense enough? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Above all, it is too intermittent. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Please tell me why I don\u2019t succeed immediately in my effort. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Because the outer ignorance is very
\nstubborn and will yield only to a persistent effort. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Why doesn\u2019t Your presence in me prevent me from misbehaving? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Because the outer being \u2014 the one that
\nmisbehaves \u2014 is unaware of that presence or refuses to recognise it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 103<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

I want the psychic consciousness with all my heart; I will pay any
\nprice for it. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The only price to be paid is a persistent and unwavering will. <\/i><\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>11 June 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

In our yoga, what attitude should we take towards animals? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

One can have the true attitude only when
\none has attained the consciousness of the divine Oneness; meanwhile it is good
\nalways to treat animals with respect, love and compassion. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>11 June 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

But shouldn\u2019t we kill pests? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Of course. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>12 June 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Is the obscurity inside me or does it come from outside? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Obscurity is everywhere in material things
\n\u2014 inside and outside. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>12 June 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What can one do against obsession when there is very intense
\nsuffering? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Look at a beautiful flower. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>13 June 1935<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 104<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

But when one is in very great suffering, even a beautiful flower
\nis boring, unless I am mistaken. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

That would be the sign of a total
\nenslavement to the vital part that is suffering. You must learn to stand back and
\ndetach yourself from the lower, external movements. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>14 June 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I think it is a weakness not to be able to bear the suffering of
\nother people and to avoid those who suffer. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If one has neither the psychological nor
\nthe material means to bring them relief, I see no point in dwelling on them. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>16 June 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

The same mistakes are always drawing me away from You, and I have
\nto take refuge in solitude. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You must know whether you can do it
\nwithout falling into a depression, which would be even worse than gossiping. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 June 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Always the same fire is ravaging me from every side.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

You ought to extinguish it if it is really
\nravaging you, or make use of it if it can purify you. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>20 June 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

A fire is burning in me; it is tremendous. It drains my vital
\nenergy; I have the feeling that someone is devouring me. I don\u2019t know what to
\ndo.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 105<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

All these things are hostile suggestions that
\nought to be rejected. Have you got a fever? If so, ask the doctor to treat you.
\nBut if you don\u2019t have fever, this fire business is a wrong imagination that
\nshould be rejected. <\/span><\/p>\n

There is a sacred fire
\nthat burns in the heart and envelops the whole being: it is Agni<\/span>,
\nwho illumines and purifies all. I kindle that fire in you each time that you
\nask me for some progress; but it destroys nothing except falsehood and
\nobscurity. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>20 June 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

You say that You kindle that fire in me \u2014 then why do the falsehood
\nand obscurity still exist? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

An integral purification is a long and
\nslow labour. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>21 June 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Is there such a thing as hell? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, there are hells that are formed by
\nhuman thought which exist in certain regions of the vital world. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>21 June 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Is it true that it is the Divine who has made us ignorant and
\nunconscious? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

That is nonsense. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I would like to know something about silence. Is it more
\nbeneficial than concentrating on the lower nature? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Concentrating on the lower nature is NEVER
\ngood; you should\u00a0<\/span>concentrate on what you want to develop,
\nnot on what you want to destroy.  <\/span> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 106<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I think that one should be peaceful and silent outwardly too. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Peaceful, certainly; silence is not always
\npossible. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 June 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

But how have we become ignorant and unconscious? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I suppose that by \u201cwe\u201d you mean human
\nbeings. Human beings have not become <\/i>ignorant
\nand obscure. They have always been that way, because material nature was
\nunconscious and obscure long before man appeared. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Can silence bring all the force needed for purification and
\ntransformation? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Not exactly bring<\/i>, but in silence one can receive it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 June 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Is it after death that one suffers those torments? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, if
\none believes in them.<\/i><\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 June 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cWhen we have passed beyond enjoyings<\/span>,
\nthen we shall have bliss. Desire was the helper; desire is the bar.\u201d (Sri Aurobindo<\/span>)\u00b9<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Is this Bliss gained by Desire?<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n


\n\u00b9Thoughts and Glimpses<\/i>, Cent. Vol. 16, p.
\n377.<\/font><\/span> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 107<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

No. Desire is useful only at the beginning
\nof evolution to awaken consciousness from its torpor, but desire cannot lead
\none to \u2014 Bliss only self-giving can do that. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 June 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Tell me why I love You. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is your psychic being, like all psychic
\nbeings, that loves me. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>25 June 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Everyone has a psychic being, but not everyone loves You. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Either because they are not conscious of
\ntheir psychic being, or because they do not know me. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Have I stopped bargaining with my love now? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Psychic love never bargains \u2014 but the vital
\nalways tries to derive some benefit for itself in all circumstances. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Is it only my psychic being that loves You? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

To the extent that the mind, vital and
\nphysical are under the control of the psychic being, they also love me. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>26 June 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cWhen we have passed beyond individualising, then we shall be real
\nPersons. Ego was the helper; Ego is the bar.\u201d (Sri Aurobindo<\/span>)\u00b9<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n


\n\u00b9Thoughts and Glimpses<\/i>, Cent. Vol. 16, p.
\n377.<\/font><\/span> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 108<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Ego is the helper so long as it is needed
\nto form the physical individuality, but when that is formed, ego must
\ndisappear. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>26 June 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What attitude should I keep so that nothing can harm me? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Perfect detachment, equality,
\ndisinterestedness.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Tell me, then, how to overcome the danger of ambition which still remains
\nin spite of my knowing the truth. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

By learning to see the futility of its
\nfleeting and hollow satisfactions. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Since in my previous life I made an effort without achieving
\ntransformation, what proof is there that I will achieve it in this life? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Because in your previous life the time had
\nnot yet come when an integral transformation would be possible. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>29 June 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cThe perfected ones were no longer obliged, like other men, to
\npurify themselves in new bodies.\u201d What is meant by \u201cpurify themselves in new
\nbodies\u201d? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is during one\u2019s physical life on earth
\nthat one has the opportunity to purify oneself, to make spiritual progress. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>1 July 1935<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 109<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

\u201cWhen we have passed beyond humanity, then we shall be the Man.
\nThe Animal was the helper; the Animal is the bar.\u201d (Sri Aurobindo<\/span>)\u00b9<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

The animal is the helper in attaining manhood, later it becomes a
\nbar. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Humanity in its present state is still at
\nthe animal stage; one must therefore go beyond this ordinary human state in order
\nto become a true man, capable of becoming conscious of the Divine. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>1 July 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

A few days ago X told me some stories about vital beings and
\nghosts. Since then I feel afraid in the dark. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Why do you listen to these stories? They
\nare very stupid. Most often ghosts exist only in people\u2019s imaginations. As for
\nvital beings, if we do not fear them they can do us no harm. And with the
\ndivine protection what fear can one have? None. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I cannot find the love and peace anywhere. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The love and peace have not left you; it
\nis you who no longer see them. No doubt it is again the same force you mention
\nthat is trying to make you blind. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>3 July 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What force is trying to make me blind and what must I do to drive
\nit away? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

An adverse will that sends suggestions \u2014 you must simply <\/span>refuse to believe its suggestions, that\u2019s
\nall. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u00b9Thoughts and Glimpses, <\/font> <\/span><\/i>
\nCent.
\nVol. 16, p. 377.<\/span><\/font> <\/font><\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 110<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

You wrote that an adverse will is sending suggestions, but I am
\nnot aware of it. Will You explain this to me? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

How can you say that you are not aware of
\nit when you yourself write: \u201cBut often someone makes me blind and I no longer
\nsee Your light\u201d? What you call \u201csomeone\u201d I call \u201cadverse suggestions\u201d. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>6 July 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I see only the result of these suggestions \u2014 not how they come. I
\nwant to know how the adverse will works. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It makes a mental formation that has some
\naffinity with the mind of the person who is to be influenced. This formation
\nremains in that person\u2019s mental atmosphere and slips in at the slightest
\nopportunity. If the person is not conscious or watchful enough, he becomes
\naware of the formation only when it has already entered his brain and then he
\nmistakes the formation for his own thought. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>7 July 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I think there has been something unusual about the general
\natmosphere in the Ashram these last two days. My depression continues in spite
\nof effort, aspiration and calm. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I do not think that things are as you say,
\nand in any case, as far as you are concerned, the best thing is not to worry
\nand to  <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 111<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

aspire calmly until your difficulties are
\ndispelled. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I imagine that perhaps some force is going to descend and that all
\nthis is only resistance. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is always resistance that creates
\nconfusion. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>8 July 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I still have the feeling that the Ashram atmosphere is heavy. But
\nit would be better if I didn\u2019t think about it. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Certainly it would be much better not to
\npay any attention to it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>8 July 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Why has my condition become so dry? Is it a test? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

What do you mean by a test? It is
\ncertainly not something arbitrarily imposed on you. Your condition is always
\nthe natural outcome of your way of thinking, feeling and acting. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I have a premonition that something hostile is going to happen to
\nme. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

To have a premonition of something bad is
\nof no use unless you take advantage of it to repel the bad thing. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>11 July 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t know what this bad thing is, nor when it will come. If I
\ndon\u2019t understand it, I don\u2019t know how to repel it.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 112<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

You can simply reject the idea that
\nsomething bad is going to happen to you. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

My effort to become the servant of the Divine will continue till
\nthe end of my life. I would rather die than give up yoga. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

There is no question of your giving up yoga
\nand I am quite sure that you will not do it. Nor is there any reason for you to
\ndie. You will live and you will live for the Divine. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>12 July 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

O Mother, I feel too far away from You. I appeal to You: give me
\nthe strength to overcome the adverse powers and to conquer my lower nature and
\nall that is tormenting me. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t think there is anything for you to
\nworry about. You are no further from me than you were before. It is still the
\nsame parts of your being that refuse to participate in the divine life;
\npreviously you were not aware of them, but now, on the contrary, you are
\nbecoming more and more conscious of them, and consciousness is a real progress
\n\u2014<\/span> <\/span>it is the way towards mastery. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 July 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

So what must I do to make these lower parts participate in the
\ndivine life? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You must educate them as one educates a
\nchild. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>16 July 1935<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 113<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

\n
\nI will do Your work, Sweet Mother, the work for which I am with
\nYou. When it is done I shall merge into You. I believe that is Your will.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nFor the moment my will goes only as far as
\nthis: to do the work that is to be done upon earth. For the rest we shall see
\nlater on.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>18 July 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\nEverywhere the atmosphere is full of egoism; anyone who is not
\negoistic gets swallowed up, I think.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nThat is true only for those who are living
\nin the ordinary consciousness.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n


\n\u00a0<\/span>18 July 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n


\nIs it possible to know the divine will without having any
\nexperience of the divine Reality, without rising to the intuitive consciousness
\nor entering into the depths of one\u2019s heart?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nCertainly, without at least one of these
\nthree conditions, one runs a grave risk of being mistaken and taking one\u2019s own
\nsubconscious will for the divine Will.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n


\n\u00a0<\/span>19 July 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n


\n\u201cHe who renounces his possessions is on a higher level than he who
\nthinks only of increasing them.\u201d
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\nBut if one renounces one\u2019s possessions, what will one do, how will
\none live?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nI find this viewpoint terribly egoistic.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\nOne must know how to
\ngive everything in order to learn how truly to possess.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n


\n\u00a0<\/span>21 July 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 114<\/span><\/p>\n

\n\t<\/p>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n

\n
\nMy studies are suffering because of constant depression.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nI have told you that it is by studying
\nthat you can overcome the depression.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\nMy consciousness is veiled. Am I Your child?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nCertainly your psychic being is my child,
\nand it knows it very well.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n


\n\u00a0<\/span>27 July 1935<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n


\nHow many more days must I suffer in this dark and painful abyss? I
\nam very sad that I cannot be Your child.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nI do not understand what you mean; I have
\nnever told you that you cannot be my child. I have told you, on the contrary,
\nthat in your psychic being you are my child, and that you will become fully
\nconscious of it when you become conscious of your psychic being.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n


\n\u00a0<\/span>2 August 1935 <\/span><\/i>\n<\/p>\n


\nI meant that I am sad because I am not able to become Your child
\nand Your faithful servant, although that is why I am here.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nThat is exactly what I understood \u2014 and I
\nrepeat that nothing (except your own will) can prevent you from being my child
\nand becoming my faithful servant.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n


\n\u00a0<\/span>2 August 1935<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 115<\/span><\/p>\n

\n\t<\/p>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n

\n
\nHow can I receive anything from Sri Aurobindo if I go to Him with
\nsadness on Darshan day?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nOf course you must go to Him in calm and
\nlight.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>3 August 1935 <\/span><\/i>\n<\/p>\n

\n
\nI want to live the divine life; if it is impossible in this life I
\nshall doubtless do it in another life.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nThere is no need at all to think of other
\nlives; you must strive to realise the Divine in this life itself, and you will
\ndo it.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0
\n<\/span>But
\nyou must not be impatient. It is your impatience that is causing your
\ndepression.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>4 August 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\nDeliver me from this painful obscurity. Give me at least one drop
\nof peace and happiness.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nYou are like someone plunged in the ocean
\nwho complains of a lack of water!
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>6 August 1935 <\/span><\/i>\n<\/p>\n

\n
\nWouldn\u2019t it be better if I withdrew from all contacts, at least
\nuntil August 20th? Or else show me some other way to be a little peaceful and
\nconcentrated.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nYou will not get cured by doing this thing
\nor that \u2014 the cure must come from within<\/i>.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>6 August 1935 <\/span><\/i>\n<\/p>\n

\n
\nIs it desirable for me to go walking with Y?<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 116<\/span><\/p>\n

\n\t<\/p>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n

\nNo, it is not very desirable, but if you
\nstop and then get depressed, that is even less desirable.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>8 August 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n


\nFor two days I have been thinking of stopping my walks with Y; but
\nwill You please tell me why it is undesirable? I think I understand the divine
\nwill, but is it true?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nI think that one part of your
\nconsciousness does in fact perceive the divine Will quite clearly; but when you
\ntry to carry out this will integrally, your vital, thwarted in its desires and
\nimpulses, becomes depressed and refuses to cooperate, and that brings all
\nprogress to a halt.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>9 August 1935 <\/span><\/i>\n<\/p>\n

\n
\nI am depressed today. I so much wanted to remain silent and
\nconcentrated, but alas, it has all collapsed.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nThat is just what I was afraid of when you
\nspoke of stopping your walks with Y.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>9 August 1935 <\/span><\/i>\n<\/p>\n

\n
\nWas it a good thing for me to go to Z\u2019s house last night to listen
\nto the music? Today I feel some disturbance.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nIt is not much use asking questions about
\nthings that are already past. If the effect was bad, you must overcome it, and
\nif it is good, you must preserve it.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>17 August 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 117<\/span><\/p>\n

\n\t<\/p>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n

\n
\nX has been ill these last few days. How did she fall ill?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nProbably as the result of a depression.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\nWhy is X afraid of You? If we are afraid of You, how can we
\nprogress?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nCertainly fear is a great obstacle on the
\nway.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\nA part of my being tells me not to bother about other people\u2019s
\naffairs. But my nature is like that; it is not at all easy to stop it.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nThere is no harm in being helpful and
\nobliging.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>23 August 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\nY is depressed. He says that the depression comes by Your will.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nThat is quite absurd. My will, on the
\ncontrary, is that each one should always go forward peacefully and steadily,
\nwithout ever falling back into these lower states.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\nX says that she feels as if she were in prison here.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nI never put anyone in prison.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>24 August 1935 <\/span><\/i>\n<\/p>\n

\n
\nWhat sort of freedom does X want? Why does she feel imprisoned
\nhere?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nIt is her vital complaining. <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 118<\/span><\/p>\n

\n\t<\/p>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n


\nAre we here to do yoga or to remain utterly free to act according
\nto our desires and ambitions?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nThe so-called freedom claimed by the vital
\nis not any freedom at all, but a slavery to the lower desires and impulses.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n


\nO Mother! Who will calm this evil whirlwind that is carrying
\npeople far from the true path? Mother, how can You agree to remain in this
\nterrible darkness and ignorance?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nI am on earth because it is on earth that
\nthe divine work must he done, and for no other reason.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>24 August 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\nIs suffering indispensable in order to make progress?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nCertainly NOT.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>26 August 1935 <\/span><\/i>\n<\/p>\n

\n
\nIs it true that it is not easy for You to work on each individual
\n\u2014 that there is almost always some resistance or revolt?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nCertainly there is resistance in almost
\neverybody, and revolt in many.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n


\n\u00a0<\/span>27 August 1935 <\/span><\/i>\n<\/p>\n


\nX says that her way is clear, but that there is one difficulty
\nwhich can only be removed by You and no one else can help her. I don\u2019t know how
\nto make her understand the truth, since she doesn\u2019t even listen to You!<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 119<\/span><\/p>\n

\n\t<\/p>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n

\nDo not worry; you have done your best to
\nhelp X. If she does not want to listen, there is nothing you can do.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n


\n\u00a0<\/span>29 August 1935 <\/span><\/i>\n<\/p>\n


\nBefore, I used to have periods of happiness, peace and love. Why
\nhaven\u2019t I had any for several months?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nIn children the psychic is often very much
\non the surface and it makes them peaceful and happy. As one grows up, the vital
\nand the mind develop and take on more importance \u2014 and then the troubles and
\nsorrows begin.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>30 August 1935 <\/span><\/i>\n<\/p>\n

\n
\nMy sadness goes on increasing. I know that it is still the vital,
\nbut certainly it will not be able to spread its depression.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nI see no reasonable cause for this
\nsadness; to me it looks like something unreal, a sort of false imagination that
\nhas seized hold of you. Reject all that immediately.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>8 September 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\nI don\u2019t understand how the depression could penetrate so deeply. I
\nthink that it is again the same force that is putting me in this condition.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nYes, it is the vital indulging in its
\ndepression.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\nI don\u2019t know how to prevent the vital from enjoying its depression.
\nWhat can I do? It does what it wants.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nYou must strengthen your will.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>9 September 1935 <\/span><\/i>
\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 120<\/span><\/p>\n

\n\t<\/p>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n

\n
\nCan You not pacify my vital, make it a little less rigid?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nIt has been pacified so often, and each
\ntime it has shaken off the peace like a cloak of boredom.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\nHow can I strengthen my love so that it can vanquish the desires
\nand impulses that hinder my progress?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nConcentrate on the psychic consciousness.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\nIs it a lack of trust that is delaying the conversion of the
\nvital?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nYes, without a doubt.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>10 September 1935 <\/span>
\n<\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\nLet me become like a child, simple, flexible, humble, trusting. O
\nMother, when will I be like that?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nSoon, if your will to become like that is
\npersistent.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>10 September 1935 <\/span>
\n<\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\nIs it true that You wrote that I would live for the Divine, only
\nto encourage me?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nNo, I wrote it because I thought it.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\nIs it necessary to feel the atmosphere of other people?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nIt is better not to feel it as long as you
\nhave not acquired the power to correct all the wrong vibrations.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\nIs it necessary to know the nature of the people with whom one
\nmight enter into relationship?<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 121<\/span><\/p>\n

\n\t<\/p>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n

\nObviously if one is in contact with
\npeople, it is better to know what they are like.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>11 September 1935 <\/span>
\n<\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\nMy condition gets worse and worse. I feel as if I am stuck, unable
\nto take a step forward.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nSometimes it is precisely when one is
\ndissatisfied with oneself that one makes the most progress.<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\nPlease tell me why my progress has stopped. Before, Your presence
\nwas constantly within me. Now I understand nothing and I don\u2019t know what to do.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nI have already explained to you that the
\nfirst contact with the force gives the psychic being the power to dominate the
\nconsciousness and govern the being. But gradually the other parts (mental,
\nvital and physical) revert to their old activities and the good condition gets
\nveiled. You must have a persistent will to regain it.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n


\n\u00a0<\/span>14 September 1935 <\/span>
\n<\/i><\/p>\n


\nWhat do You mean by becoming like a child?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nIn the child the psychic life is not
\nveiled by the mental life. Because the child is not fully moulded, he has a
\ngreat capacity for growth and is able to progress with sufficient plasticity.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n


\n\u00a0<\/span>16 September 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n


\nI would like to know about the childlike path that can be taken in
\nthis yoga.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 122<\/span><\/p>\n

\n\t<\/p>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n

\nThe childlike path is one of unquestioning
\ntrust, total dependence, unreserved surrender.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>17 September 1935 <\/span>
\n<\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\nDo You think that it would be good for me to take the childlike
\npath?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nThe childlike path is always better \u2014 but
\nit is not so easy, for it must be taken spontaneously and in all sincerity.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>18 September 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\nIs it true that X trusts me less now?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nX does not want any intermediary between
\nherself and me, and she is right.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\nEverything is happening as if in a dream where everything has to
\nhappen in order to bring about something good in the future.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nYes, you are right; that is how things
\nhappen here.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>23 September 1935 <\/span>
\n<\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\nYou used to be in my heart; why aren\u2019t You there any more? Because
\nI am blind, I do not see You: silence, silence, peace.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nYes, you are right; I am always there in
\nyour heart, but something in your outer consciousness is too active and makes
\ntoo much noise for you to be aware of this presence. It is only in silence and
\ncalm that you can become aware of it.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n


\n\u00a0<\/span>25 September 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n


\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0
\n<\/span>Page
\n\u2014 123<\/span><\/p>\n

\n\t<\/p>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n

\n
\nWhy doesn\u2019t X want to listen to my ideas about yoga? I want to
\nunderstand her movement.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nI have already told you: she is afraid
\nthat she may be influenced by you and she does not want to accept any other
\ninfluence than ours.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>27 September 1935 <\/span>
\n<\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\nIs there any path in which one doesn\u2019t need to make an effort from
\nthe very beginning?<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nI don\u2019t think so; but some people make the
\neffort naturally, without attaching much importance to it.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>28 September 1935 <\/span>
\n<\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\nHow the darkness rises up! It has veiled my consciousness and I
\ndon\u2019t know what to do. There must be an inner change, and until then, calm,
\naspiration.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nYes, that is right. You must constantly
\naspire for the inner change, you must have the will for the light to come into
\nthe obscure physical mind, and you must calmly wait for the result of this
\naspiration and will.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/span>11 October 1935<\/span> <\/font><\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\nI
\ndon\u2019t understand the difference between willing and aspiring, or how to do both
\nthings at once. <\/span><\/font>
\n<\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/font><\/span><\/p>\n


\nIf you cannot do both things at once, then just do one of them.
\n<\/span><\/font>\n<\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/font><\/span>14
\nOctober 1935<\/font><\/span> <\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\nI
\ndon\u2019t understand the difference between willing and aspiring, or how to do both
\nthings at once. <\/span><\/font>
\n<\/i><\/p>\n

\n
\n <\/font><\/span><\/p>\n


\nIf you cannot do both things at once, then just do one of them.
\n<\/span><\/font>\n<\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0<\/font><\/span>14
\nOctober 1935 <\/font><\/span>\n<\/p>\n

\n
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0
\n<\/span>Page
\n\u2014 124<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

I don\u2019t understand what is meant by intellectual faith. Faith is a
\ntrust without reasoning. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is not intellectual but mental the mental <\/i>\u2014 being has a faith and the vital
\nbeing too can have its faith as well as the physical being. As for the psychic
\nbeing, its faith is natural and spontaneous \u2014 faith is the very essence of the
\npsychic being. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 October 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

There are supposed to be two kinds of faith: simple, blind faith,
\nin which there is no reasoning, and faith with some reasoning, some
\nunderstanding \u2014 intellectual faith. But I don\u2019t understand the latter: it is
\nsaid to remain firm under all circumstances since it is based on a certain
\nunderstanding.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

There is only one faith, but it manifests in
\ndifferent parts of the being. I suppose that what the person you refer to calls
\n\u201cblind faith\u201d is the faith in the heart, which needs no reasons <\/i>to exist; but there is also the faith in the mind, which
\nmay be based on some kind of reasoning. To be sure of having an unshakable
\nfaith, one must have it in every part of the being. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>19 October 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What is the origin of the faith that manifests in the various
\nparts of the being? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Faith is the expression of a spiritual
\nvirtue. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>21 October 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>I feel that my nature is
\nbecoming more complicated, less sincere. Why is that? <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 125<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

As the mind develops, the simple and pure
\nsincerity of the child disappears. It must be replaced with a more conscious,
\nmore spiritual sincerity \u2014 the psychic sincerity. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>21 December 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>How can I get this psychic
\nsincerity? Life is becoming more and more boring. It will certainly take a long
\ntime to get this sincerity, but how can I live without it? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Patience <\/span><\/i>is one of the most essential conditions of the spiritual life. One
\nmust know how to wait in order to receive. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 December 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Please tell me how my consciousness got carried away to the very
\nmaterial and half-conscious domain? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

It did not get carried there \u2014 it is there
\nquite naturally, as all human consciousnesses are. What is exceptional is when
\nthe consciousness rises above this material plane. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>2 January 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

My nature will not obey my resolve. You seem so far from me, as if
\nYou were not there. I ask You for only one thing: peaceful solitude, so that
\neverything may be all right. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

My dear child, you have to find the peace,
\nthe silence and the solitude within yourself, and in that solitude you will
\nbecome conscious of my presence. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>My
\nblessings are with you. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>11 January 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 126<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

O my Mother, I have no peace, no love. I know that this has
\nhappened through my own fault. Will I find You again, O my dear Mother? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, if you allow the fire of aspiration
\nto burn in you. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>14 January 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, what must I do so that the fire of aspiration never goes
\nout? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

One keeps this fire lit by throwing into
\nit all one\u2019s difficulties, all one\u2019s desires, all one\u2019s imperfections. In the
\nmorning and evening when you come to me, you should ask me in your heart to
\nkeep the fire lit and offer me all these things as fuel. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 January 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I feel that it is necessary for me to go into retirement so that
\nthe fire may burn more intensely. Let me go into solitude. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is in the midst of activity that the fire
\nmust burn, so that it may set right all your movements. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Keep the fire lit; I offer You all my movements. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

As long as you aspire to keep the flame
\nlit, I will take care that it does not go out. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>17 January 1936 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

I have concentrated very much on the
\nflame, but alas, my aspiration has not been strong enough to light it.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is not your work to light the fire. As
\nI told you, I am always lighting it <\/span><\/p>\n

\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>Page
\n\u2014 127<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

\n \u2014 you have only to open
\nyourself to receive it and tend it with your goodwill. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 January 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Into the fire all desires, all attachment, all impurity, all
\nimperfection, as fuel. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, that is good. This movement should be
\nconstantly renewed.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>27 January 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Is it true that there is a time when the good parts of the being
\nrecede into the background and only the lower parts remain on the surface?
\nHence the sense of a fall and the forgetting of the good experiences. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

There are people to whom such a thing
\nhappens, but it is not inevitable <\/i>and
\ncertainly not desirable. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>13 February 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

To go away from here! It is impossible to think that anyone can
\nlove us more than You! <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You are right, my dear child; those who
\nare not happy here cannot be happy anywhere. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>7 March 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What attitude should I have when I come to You? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

When you come to me, you should be
\npeaceful and open. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>11 March 1936<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 128<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

How can I detach myself from the sadness that comes from within? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Do not attach any importance to it. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Obstacles and difficulties should not cause suffering. I think
\nthat we create the suffering by our ignorance. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Certainly the suffering is not
\nindispensable, nor even necessary. It is indeed ignorance that makes one
\nsuffer. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

At least I believe there would be neither suffering nor difficulty
\nin this yoga if I could look at everything calmly and patiently. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, this yoga is based on peace and joy,
\nnot on suffering. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>12 March 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I was irritated with X because her ideas were so lacking in
\nhumility. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Ignorance always lacks humility \u2014 the more
\nignorant the mind, the more it judges and the more it revolts. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>13 March 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What must one do to illumine the mind? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Make it calm and quiet \u2014 in calm it can
\nreceive the light. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>14 March 1936 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

My mind is always the same, ever full of thoughts. It has never
\nlearned to be silent.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 129<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

This is precisely what I call mental
\nagitation. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>25 March 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

In a dream I saw You embracing me; was it imagination? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

In spirit I always hold you in my arms
\nlike a little child, to help you and protect you \u2014 but is that what you mean? <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>25 March 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

In spirit You are holding me in Your arms, but when will You
\nreally hold me in Your arms so that I can be safe from every outside influence?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t think that you expect me to hold
\nyou in my arms physically! If I had to hold all my children in my arms
\n(starting with the 140 people of the Ashram), my body would really have to be
\nbigger than it is! <\/span><\/p>\n

        
\nAnd
\nyet to an awakened consciousness, my presence is entirely concrete. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>26 March 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Please give me some advice on how to concentrate and be ready to
\nreceive Your grace. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Will for this concentration and strengthen
\nyour will. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 April 1936 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Will You tell me why, along with an awareness of my difficulties,
\nI do not receive the strength to overcome them?<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 130<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Because the consciousness in you is more
\ndeveloped than the will. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>16 April 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

You say that You don\u2019t want to intervene in this affair between Y
\nand me. But why? Do You think that these things are unimportant? And yet they
\ncan disturb and even harm the sadhana. Please give me a very frank answer. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Since you have asked me to answer you very
\nfrankly, I will tell you that I do not want to intervene because I am not sure that
\nyou will have the strength and firmness to persist in doing what I tell you to
\ndo. And for spiritual life it is better to act in ignorance than to act in
\ndisobedience to the command of one\u2019s guru.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>21 April 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What do You mean by a life of true sincerity? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

To make all your actions conform to your
\nhighest aspiration and purest will. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>2 May 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I now feel even further from You, lost in darkness, like a ship
\ndriven by the storm. Being in this condition makes me very sad. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Just shake off all these wrong
\nsuggestions, which are not true, and stop believing in all this drama, which is
\npurely imaginary. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>7 May 1936<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 131<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Please explain how these suggestions come to me. They seemed quite
\nreal to me. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

As all suggestions come: they are mental
\nformations that hover in the atmosphere and seize upon any mind that is ready
\nto receive them. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>7 May 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Do You think that it is very dangerous for me to have attachment? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Dangerous for what? If you mean for your
\nspiritual progress, an attachment is certainly not considered to be a very
\ndesirable thing. <\/span><\/p>\n

8 May 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I want to understand what You mean by a sentimental attachment, a
\nvital attachment, and \u201cno expression of any kind to such an attachment\u201d. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

A sentimental attachment is an attachment of
\nthe feelings; a vital attachment is an attachment of the senses. By
\n\u201cexpression\u201d I mean exchanging affectionate words or sensual gestures such as
\nholding hands, caressing, etc. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>14 May 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, do You believe that everything I tell You will be without
\nhypocrisy? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I truly hope that you are not a hypocrite,
\nfor hypocrisy is a great obstacle on the spiritual path. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>16 May 1936<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 132<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I see clouds all around me shutting out Your light. How can I feel
\nYour presence again? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The first condition is to keep your mind
\ncalm and peaceful. It is in calm that the Light can descend. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>19 May 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Forgive me, I am still ignorant, I know nothing. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

My help is always with you, and also the
\nstrength to overcome your weaknesses and difficulties. But you must know how to
\nreceive and use them. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 May 1936<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Every day I make an effort, but unfortunately I see a great
\nopposition to the effort. Great reactions occur. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If there were no reactions, there would be
\nno need to make an effort. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>28 May 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I am quite willing to do as You say, but tell me how to rise from
\nthe lower to the higher consciousness. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I have already told you that the first
\ncondition is to quiet your mind and to make an effort to quiet your vital as
\nwell. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Do You want me to avoid everything that can prevent me from
\nrising, or to struggle against it and pass through? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I do not understand what you mean by
\n\u201cpassing through\u201d. <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 133<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

In any case it is always wiser to avoid
\nanything that lowers the consciousness. <\/span>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The vital, unhappy and dissatisfied if we deprive it of its
\nsatisfaction, ravages everything and throws the consciousness into a state of
\ninertia. But what is better than satisfying the vital? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

From the point of view of yoga the
\nquestion does not even arise; yoga cannot tolerate this kind of vital
\nsatisfaction. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>30 May 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Did You look serious because I had not told You that I had yielded
\nto the impulse to touch a woman? Make me aware of my insincerity. You promised
\nto speak to me frankly, so I do not understand why You didn\u2019t question me about
\nwhat You heard. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Sincerity demands that you confess
\nimmediately without my needing to question you. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Is it because I have become more insensitive that I don\u2019t feel
\nYour disapproval more deeply? Nowadays I don\u2019t get very upset, I don\u2019t feel
\nsorry for my undesirable actions. Is it because I have got used to them? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes; by continuing to do things which you
\nknow very well ought not to be done, you are hardening yourself and veiling
\nyour consciousness more and more. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I think that the will to raise myself still persists. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is of the greatest importance that this
\nwill should assert itself  and triumph. It is absolutely necessary. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>8 June 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 134<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Yesterday, when I heard that X was ill, I could not resist the
\nimpulse to go and see her and help her. Why is it easier to love a human being
\nthan to love the Divine? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t see that it is easier. It depends
\non the person. The difference is that what men call \u201clove\u201d for another human
\nbeing is not love at all, but a frightful mixture of sentimentality, weakness,
\nignorance and sensuality. It is obvious that such a feeling cannot be directed
\ntowards the Divine. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>17 June 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

After receiving Your help, is it possible to use it badly or not
\neven use it at all? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, it happens very often. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>26 June 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Will You explain to me how it happens that we misuse Your help, or
\ndon\u2019t even use it at all? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

People receive the force and power that I
\ngive and use it to satisfy their own desires instead of using it to serve the
\nDivine. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>2 July 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

How far I have drifted from the spiritual life, from the true attitude!
\nThis business of human love assumes such great proportions that afterwards it
\nbecomes difficult to extricate oneself from it. Why is it like this?<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 135<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

A great vigilance is required to avoid
\nfalling into the movements of the lower consciousness; and a still greater will
\nis needed to get out of them. So arm yourself with patience and a strong will. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 July 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

It is too difficult-perform a miracle to detach me from my vital
\nmovements. Last night I was very restless; I didn\u2019t know what to do. I don\u2019t
\nknow if I can keep my feet in the midst of this chaos. I am afraid that some
\nunfortunate reactions may occur in the future because of this forced break with
\nX. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Do not make a mountain out of such a
\nlittle thing; later you will laugh at this affair \u2014 which you are taking so
\ntragically now \u2014 when a little more light and consciousness have penetrated
\ninto your lower vital. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>6 July 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

X sent me a letter and I replied. But do You like us to communicate
\nin this way? Do You want me to stop speaking to her altogether and refuse to
\nvisit her? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I see no point in your asking me what I
\nwant or do not want \u2014 for my will is that you should rise above the lower
\nconsciousness and become conscious of your psychic being, so that your psychic
\nbeing governs your life and your actions. At this point you must ask yourself
\nwhat you are able and not able to do, and then act at each moment to the best
\nof your ability. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>7 July 1936<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 136<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Last night I went mad; my consciousness went down and nothing
\ninterested me \u2014 neither rest, nor reading, nor sleep. What I am saying is true
\nand not an imagination. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I find all this completely ridiculous and
\nquite out of proportion to the circumstances. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Please tell me why I am feeling all this now. I have never before
\nfelt such an extreme impulsive drive. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Because your vital is contrary. If I had
\ntold it, \u201cYou must not leave X and you will never be able to leave her\u201d, it
\nwould have had only one thought: to run far away from her! <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Are You sure there is no harm in detaching myself forcefully from
\nX? Won\u2019t there be some terrible reactions? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Please don\u2019t exaggerate like this. These
\nreactions are \u201cterrible\u201d only if you think they are. Set your mind straight,
\nsee how infantile and unimportant all this is, and all these \u201cterrible\u201d
\nreactions will disappear completely. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>7 July 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I believe a day will come when You will trust me and not believe
\nthat I am a hypocrite and do things secretly \u2014 a day when I will show You that
\nI am sincere. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

One can be perfectly sincere only when one
\nis completely conscious. But keep your will to become more and more perfectly
\nsincere \u2014 and everything will be all right. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>10 July 1936 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 137<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Will You tell me why my thoughts like to dramatise things and make
\nmountains out of molehills? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The unenlightened parts of the being
\nalways enjoy doing that. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Please show me the true way of making an effort. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You must train the will as you would train
\nthe muscles \u2014 by methodical exercise. Never allow yourself to do something once
\nyou have decided not to do it. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Justice, justice \u2014<\/span><\/i> <\/span>where is justice? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Fool! Do not call for justice \u2014 that is,
\nfor the strict consequences of your actions. Only the divine Grace can pull you
\nout of your difficulty. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>10 July 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Do You think that I have become worse than before? Or were all
\nthese things already in me and I was not aware of them? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Always one carries in oneself the seed of
\nall that one is and does. But this seed may die before it develops, and that is
\nwhat ought to happen to undesirable things. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 July 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

A doubt still lingers in my consciousness: You even believe lies. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I know perfectly well when people are
\nlying, even when they lie very well and imagine that they can deceive me. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 July 1936<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 138<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I aspire for Your Grace to come and lift me from the ordinary
\nconsciousness to the spiritual consciousness. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

For the Grace to help you, you must fulfil
\nthe conditions, and the very first condition is to reject all doubt, however
\nslight. I repeat again: you would do well to read once more, carefully and
\nattentively, the first two chapters of The
\nMother.<\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>16 July 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I am proud and vain: I think that I can understand everything! It
\nis quite natural that the Grace should withdraw from me. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Strictly speaking, the Grace does not
\nwithdraw; people make it impossible for themselves to receive it. But you have
\nonly to take the right attitude and keep it, so that the Grace can once more do
\nits saving work. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>17 July 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Sri Aurobindo<\/span> writes in The Mother: \u201cIf
\npart of the being surrenders, but another part reserves itself, follows its own
\nway or makes its own conditions, then each time that that happens, you are
\nyourself pushing the divine Grace away from you\u201d.\u00b9<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Now I understand how I ought to surrender. But one part wants
\nordinary enjoyment and refuses a spiritual happiness that demands surrender.
\nFor this part, consecration is something terrible and it wants to flee from it.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You must remain firm in your will and use
\npersuasion \u2014 gradually the rebellious part will surrender. It refuses to
\nsurrender out of ignorance. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n


\n\u00b9Cent. Vol.
\n25, p. 2.<\/font><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 139<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

\nThat ignorance must be dissolved. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>17 July 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Will you tell me what still remains to be done so that the Grace
\ncan return? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Remain quiet and trust in the Grace; it is
\nalways present and ready to help those who call on it with a sincere heart. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 July 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

So long as I don\u2019t go out in the morning, I am calm, I can
\nconcentrate and study. But once I go out, I cannot study any more, especially
\nbecause of the meter readings.\u00b9 I have to go to people\u2019s rooms; sometimes I get
\na headache because the atmosphere is too much for me. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

When you are doing your work, you should
\nconcentrate only on your work and not on the people \u2014 there is no need to speak
\nto them or pay any attention to them. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>21 July 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

O Mother, I want to become aware that You are watching over me at
\nevery moment. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Take one step back from the surface
\nconsciousness, enter just a little inside yourself, and you will become aware
\nof it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 July 1936 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n


\n\u00b9Electricity
\nmeter readings. The disciple recorded the daily consumption of electricity at
\nAshram houses.<\/font><\/span> <\/font><\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 140<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Does the universal Justice prevent us from rising above the
\nuniverse when we want to? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

To a certain extent, yes. Certainly in
\norder to rise above the universe<\/i>, one
\nmust be absolutely liberated from Justice, for Justice is part of the universe.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>25 July 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Divine Mother, is it possible for us to receive kindness wrongly? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, in fact that is just what most often
\nhappens among human beings. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>27 July 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, may I write to You directly when I need something extra?
\nBecause at Prosperity [The department that supplies the basic material needs of
\nthe Ashram members.] they behave like detectives and ask personal questions. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is on my orders that everyone is
\nquestioned about their requests. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 August 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

O my Beloved, teach me how to love You truly. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

True love is a self-forgetting. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>5 September 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

One cuts oneself off from the Grace through disobedience to one\u2019s
\nguru. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 141<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

\n
\nBecause of my ignorant and obscure behaviour, it is
\nquite natural that the Grace should be veiled from me. One day I will have it
\nagain. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I am sure that the Grace has not withdrawn
\nfrom you, but perhaps your consciousness has put itself into a condition where it
\ncan no longer feel the Grace. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>7 September 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t feel You in my heart, but I see You above me. If my
\nfeeling is not mistaken, will You tell me the difference? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

No, it is not mistaken: <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>In
\nthe heart it is a psychic contact; above the head it is a mental contact. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>10 September 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

In what part of the mind is Your presence found? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The higher mind. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

What is the difference in effect between Your presence in the
\nheart and above the body? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

No difference in its effect. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>11 September 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t know why, but I am unable to eat as much as I need. If I
\neat a lot, I get a heavy stomach.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 142<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

You are probably eating too quickly you
\nmust be swallowing without chewing. You must chew the food thoroughly and eat calmly.
\nThen one can eat more and the stomach does not get heavy. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>14 September 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Your presence has become
\nrather cold, and for some time I haven\u2019t been feeling the happiness and peace.
\nThis shows that something has happened in me. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The outer consciousness finds it difficult
\nto keep the fire of aspiration burning always with the same intensity. But with
\nyour will you must watch over the purifying fire and revive it when it fails. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>14 September 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, is there any place for reason in true love? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

They may exist side by side in one nature,
\nbut normally they do not have much to do with each other. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 September 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Humility \u2014\u00a0 <\/span>did You mean
\nbeing humble towards everybody? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Certainly not. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

To be humble towards You, yes, that I will do. Let me receive Your
\nGrace so that I may realise humility! <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is towards the Divine that you must be
\nhumble, an absolute and integral humility. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>19 September 1936 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 143<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Isn\u2019t it true that one can feel Your presence before having
\npsychic love for You? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is above all the psychic that feels the
\npresence. But sometimes the mind and the vital and even the physical also
\nperceive it. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If it is Your will that a thing should be done, why shouldn\u2019t it
\nget done? If You want me to understand philosophy, why shouldn\u2019t I understand
\nit? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

To develop the philosophical mind one must
\nstudy philosophy methodically: the various schools, their theories, etc., etc. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>22 September 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, will You tell me the names of some good French writers I
\ncould read? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If it is to learn French, you should take
\na textbook of French literature to study and then read one or two books by each
\nauthor mentioned in the textbook, beginning at the beginning, that is, with the
\nearliest authors. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>22 September 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I have always been good to X, even though she has abused me and
\ndone me a lot of harm. You see the result. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

One should not do good in the hope of
\ngetting a reward, but for the pleasure of doing good. Then one is always happy,
\nwhatever happens. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 September 1936<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 144<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Someone told me that if one feels Your presence it is because one
\nhas a psychic love for You. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is not impossible to feel the Presence
\nwithout having psychic love. But it must be rather exceptional. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 September 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I am starting to study the history of literature. I have found
\nthat I can\u2019t understand Corneille at all \u2014 I mean that I don\u2019t understand old
\nFrench. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Corneille is not old French, Corneille is
\nclassical French. It is absolutely necessary to study classical French if one
\nwants to stand a chance of speaking French correctly. You definitely should
\nread the principal 17th century authors. This is essential in order to enter
\ninto the spirit of the language. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>25 September 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I will do as You wish. I will systematically study one play by
\neach author. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Don\u2019t be in a hurry; study quietly and
\nseriously, without rushing, and make an effort to understand. You will find all
\nthe words used by these authors in the dictionary. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>26 September 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Wouldn\u2019t it be better if I studied only French literature for the
\nmoment? Then when I have really grasped the language, I can take up other
\nsubjects again. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You can add geography, grammar, history
\nand arithmetic \u2014 it won\u2019t do you any harm. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>28 September 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 145<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

At what time do You want me to go to bed and when should I get up?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You should get seven hours of sleep. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>29 September 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

How long do You want me to read and study? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Four hours of concentrated study a day is
\nenough. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>30 September 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What must I do to feel that You love me? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Care more about loving than about being
\nloved. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>3 October 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Do You think that studying helps me in my sadhana? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is a good discipline both for the mind
\nand the vital. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>5 October 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Y has written to me that his friend Z told him, \u201cWe must extend
\nour wholehearted sympathy to all who need it\u2014\u00a0
\n<\/span>even at the cost of our sadhana.\u201d <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Absurd! <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>She says that this is the
\nbest and most ennobling sort of sadhana. \u201cTo withhold our love means to be shut
\nup in our own little ego; to extend it to all means to enlarge our being and
\ncome nearer to Him.\u201d What do You think of this? <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 146<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

There is some truth in what she says, but
\nit is mixed with the usual falsehood of human sentimentality. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I told Y he had better ask You before doing what Z suggests, because
\nI don\u2019t think it is necessary to do all that when one is turned towards You. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The union with everything and everyone
\nmust be attained in the Divine<\/i>, not
\ndirectly and apart from Him. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>12 October 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Do You think, Mother, that it is possible to have true sympathy
\nfor others before having it for the Divine? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

No, it is not possible. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>13 October 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Today You gave me a flower meaning \u201cDisinterested work\u201d. So I must
\nfind the interest that lies hidden behind every kind of work. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The flower means precisely: all work that
\nis done, in all sincerity, in consecration to the Divine. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>13 October 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, isn\u2019t it true that we should not think about our own
\nprogress? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Certainly you should not worry about it,
\nbut you should have the will to progress. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>14 October 1936<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 147<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Today You gave me a flower meaning \u201cPsychic flame\u201d, but I really
\ndidn\u2019t understand what you mean to tell me. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Agni is the will for progress, the flame of
\npurification that burns up all obstacles and difficulties. By giving you the
\nflower, I am encouraging you to let it burn in you. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 October 1936<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Is it necessary to write out the geography and history lessons? I
\ncan study them by reading. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

One learns things better if one writes
\nthem. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

My hand often gets tired while writing. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You can simply rest a minute or two and
\nthen continue. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 October 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Yesterday X told me that she doesn\u2019t like Napoleon 1st, that he
\nwas not a good man, that he destroyed France. And You, Mother, what do You
\nthink of him? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

He was a great and exceptional figure. Of
\ncourse he had his faults and made mistakes \u2014 but far from destroying France he
\ngave her an undying glory. I am telling you all this, but you need not go and
\nrepeat it to X. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>21 October 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What did You mean when You gave me the flower \u201cProtection\u201d?<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 148<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

The protection is there; it is for you to
\nfind out how to take advantage of it. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Mother, is there really any suffering in our yoga? When people suffer,
\nare they suffering because of the difficulties? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

No. Usually they suffer because of a lack
\nof sincerity. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Perhaps they are seeking satisfaction through suffering! <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, that also happens. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I think that all suffering in this yoga is imaginary. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Who suffers? The vital? Is it because its desires are not
\nsatisfied? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Most often \u2014 but it also manages to suffer
\nwhen its desires are satisfied. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If we understand the cause of suffering, there is no suffering any
\nmore. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

That is true. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

We suffer through our own stupidity. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Usually it is so. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>22 October 1936<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 149<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Isn\u2019t it true that I always come to You with some desire? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You come to me thinking almost exclusively
\nabout yourself. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 October 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I think that this is the reason I am not aware of Your love. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Surely, if instead of thinking about the
\nlove that I am giving you or that you would like me to give you, you thought
\nabout the love that you would like to feel for me, you would be more open and
\nreceptive. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I think that only the Grace can enable me to forget myself. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You must also exert your will. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 October 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I feel tired today. Please tell me the reason for this tiredness. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You have probably been doing tiring things
\nin your sleep. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>26 October 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Please tell me what kind of tiring things I have been doing in my
\nsleep. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Bodily fatigue is a physical rendering of
\ncertain activities and contacts originating in the vital. In one\u2019s sleep one may
\ngo to evil places in the vital and meet evil beings. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>27 October 1936<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 150<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

O Mother, how can I fight this tiredness? I cannot study or read,
\nI am so sleepy. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If you are so sleepy, it shows that for
\none reason or another you need to sleep \u2014 it would not be good to resist. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>28 October 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Then how can I avoid these contacts with the vital world and stop
\nbeing tired? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You must use your will before going to
\nsleep. Have the will for a quiet rest during your sleep. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>28 October 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Please tell me how this great loss of Your presence, of happiness
\nand love, has come about and how to find them again. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

By a firm and steady will and a calm
\ndetermination, by refusing to let external things disturb you, by trusting in
\nthe Divine Grace and surrendering to its decisions. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>29 October 1936 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

Somebody told me that it is not necessary to surrender or be
\nsincere \u2014 we only have to open. Is it true? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Certainly not. Who told you such nonsense?
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>Without
\nsincerity the path of yoga is dangerous<\/i>;
\nwithout surrender it is impossible. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>30 October 1936<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 151<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

What did You mean to tell us by giving us the flower \u201cTrust\u201d? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Unless one has full trust in the Divine,
\nthe Divine help cannot bear its full fruit. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>6 November 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Do You think it may be harmful for me to read books that tell only
\nabout ordinary life, the joys and sorrows of life? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Obviously it is not very helpful, unless
\nthe book is very well written and you read it solely for the sake of learning
\nFrench. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>14 November 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>I would like to know
\nwhether as a general rule it is good for little children to play all the time. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

For children there should be a time for
\nwork and study and a time for play. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>16 November 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Sometimes I cannot concentrate on my studies. At that time something
\nin my brain prevents me from studying or even reading. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is tamas. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>17 November 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What is it that doesn\u2019t like studying and gets tired: the brain?<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 152<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Your physical mind, which did not get used
\nto the effort of learning when you were young enough.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Is there any harm in my remaining serious and not mixing with
\nother people? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

No, no harm. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I think that a concentrated way of life would help me to turn
\ntowards You \u2014 and also to study better. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Without any doubt. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 November 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Do You think that my mind is developing? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Regular study certainly cannot fail to
\ndevelop it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>7 December 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I am turning more and more towards study and giving less attention
\nto my sadhana. I do not know whether this is desirable. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is all right; study can become part of
\nsadhana. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>8 December 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, do You think that everything is getting better and better?
\nI think I am making less effort than before. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

At the moment you are making progress; but
\nyou must attach more importance to the stability and genuineness of the
\nprogress than to the appearance of progress. <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 153<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

\n I mean
\nthat it is more important to make progress, even invisibly, than to look as if
\nyou were making it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>9 December 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Am I wrong in thinking that sadhaks should not have relationships
\nwith people in ordinary life, people who have no inclination towards the
\nspiritual life? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Clearly it would be much better. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>12 December 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

There was a certain friendship between Y and me. Then suddenly one
\nday, he stopped talking to me and has been avoiding me. I don\u2019t need anyone
\nbecause You are mine and I am Yours. O Mother, O Mother, You are everything to
\nme! <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Human relationships are obviously very
\nunstable. Only relationships with the Divine can be permanent. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>14 December 1936<\/span><\/i> <\/font><\/span><\/p>\n


\nMother,
\nI would like to know whether my progress is stable or whether it is merely
\nsuperficial. <\/span><\/font> <\/i><\/p>\n

\n <\/font><\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\nThere is always a way to keep what you have gained. You must learn
\nto use your will. <\/span><\/font> <\/p>\n


\n\u00a0<\/font><\/span>15 December 1936
\n<\/font> <\/font><\/span><\/i><\/p>\n


\nI
\nasked \u201cProsperity\u201d for two hard-cover notebooks, but they weren\u2019t given. Did
\nYou refuse them?<\/span><\/font><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n


\nPage \u2014 154<\/span><\/font><\/p>\n

\n

No, I didn\u2019t refuse anything; they must
\nhave run out of notebooks and new ones will have to be made. But to tell the
\ntruth, you use a fantastic number of notebooks. I am sure that you have a large
\nnumber of them in which only a few pages are written on, and they could well be
\nused for something else. It is never good to waste things \u2014 too many people in
\nthe world do not have what they need. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 December 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Another remark: it seems that Z is very fond of the company of
\nboys \u2014 and she is no longer a little girl. I don\u2019t know whether I am absolutely
\nwrong in making this remark. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t think that this kind of remark and
\nthe state of consciousness it implies can be very helpful to your sadhana<\/span>. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>17 December 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Please explain to me why remarks like the one I made yesterday
\ncannot be helpful. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Remarks of this kind are always based on
\nappearances and on the physical mind, which always tends to interpret things in
\nan unkind way. Nothing could be further from the true knowledge, which is
\nalways based on an intimate understanding of things and on the psychic
\nperception. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 December 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Do You think that playing marbles will lower my consciousness? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It all depends on the spirit in which you play.
\nIf you are alert and always careful to remain conscious, it is all right. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>19 December 1936 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 155<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Yesterday I came to pranam<\/span> after playing
\nmarbles and I could not concentrate properly. This shows that the game isn\u2019t
\nvery good for me.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Obviously, playing before pranam<\/span> cannot help your concentration. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

What did You mean to tell me by giving the flower \u201cOrganisation\u201d? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Organise your life, your work, your
\nconsciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>Organisation
\nconsists in putting each thing in its true place. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 December 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

O Mother, let me seek You in the place where You are! <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

When you have found me, you will see that
\nI am everywhere. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>23 December 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

O Mother, I agree that my life and my work are not organised.
\nCan\u2019t You help me to organise them? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The first step is to get into the habit of
\nregularity} in your daily discipline. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 December 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I would like You to organise my daily time-table: <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 156<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

\u00a0<\/span>what time I should get up;
\nhow long I should read French and study; whether I should take rest in the
\nafternoon. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t think there is any point at all in
\nmy arranging all that for you. You have to discover, by progressive adjustment,
\nthe programme that suits you best and stick to it very carefully, while keeping
\nit a bit flexible so that it can be adjusted to the demands of each new day. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>30 December 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, do You believe that I feel for You the love of a child for
\nhis mother? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

A child\u2019s love for his mother is full of a
\nspontaneous and absolute trust. In you such a love can only be based upon a
\npsychic opening, for the psychic is likened to a child precisely because it
\nfeels this spontaneous and absolute trust in the Divine.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>12 January 1937<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, please make me understand where I am just now, what is
\nhappening in me. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You must make an effort to understand,
\notherwise all my explanations will be useless. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>11 March 1937 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I feel that something or someone in the physical mind is pulling
\nme down. I don\u2019t know what to do. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You must stop this someone or something from
\npulling you down. Surely you have a will \u2014 what is it
\nfor?<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>12 March 1937 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 157<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Will You explain to me now what this darkness that invaded me was?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

When you feel a darkness invading you and
\ntaking you away from me, you can be sure that it is an alien influence which
\nhas entered your atmosphere. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>19 March 1937 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Is there any harm in my reading novels in French? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Reading novels is never beneficial. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

What must one do to avoid being affected by alien influences? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Concentrate on the Divine. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 March 1937 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

No sooner is the headache gone than I get backache and a chest
\npain. Please tell me why I get all these pains one after another. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The causes are always complex, most often obscure,
\nand they come from suggestions affecting the subconscious. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>27 March 1937 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

A dream: I saw a papaya tree with very ripe fruits. Some crows and
\na monkey were on the tree to eat the  <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 158<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

fruits. I threw dust at them and they all ran away except the
\nmonkey. He sprang at me and I tore him to pieces. I think that this dream has a
\nmeaning. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The monkey usually symbolises the
\nuncontrolled physical mind. In this case he probably wanted to steal the fruits
\nof your spiritual aspiration. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>29 March 1937 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Yesterday I wrote to You about X because I don\u2019t like the exchange
\nof influence between him and Y. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I knew about it, but I always prefer my
\naction to be carried out in silence. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>14 April 1937 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

You always prefer Your action to be carried out in silence. When
\ndo You choose to inform us in writing? You have often written so many things to
\nme, sometimes even without my asking You about them. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

When there is an immediate need for a
\nresult, I tell two categories of people: <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>1)
\nThose who are very goodwilled<\/span> and aspire very much to
\nknow. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>2)
\nThose who are so shut up in their outer consciousness that they would never
\nunderstand anything unless I told them plainly. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>15 April 1937 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Would You tell me what place play has in this yoga, from the viewpoint
\nof the higher consciousness?<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 159<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

No special place so far as I know. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>28 April 1937 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

If You think there is no place for play in this yoga, why did You
\ngive me permission to play? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I did not say that play has no place in
\nthe yoga, I said that it had no place.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Z writes: \u201cI find you very restless all the time; your atmosphere
\nis not at all suitable for teaching.\u201d <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, you lack the mental calm that makes
\nstudy profitable and you find great difficulty in concentrating on what you are
\ndoing. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I would like to know how play is regarded from the viewpoint of
\nthe higher consciousness \u2014 as a vital pleasure. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Playing can be a useful relaxation,
\nespecially for young children; it can be a vital pleasure if the vital turns it
\nto its own advantage. It all depends on your attitude when you play. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I think that joking is all right. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

There are also jokes that are mean and
\nugly and ought to be carefully avoided. All jokes that wound or lower the
\nconsciousness are bad. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>29 April 1937<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What is the present state of my consciousness? I feel that I am
\nnot progressing any more. Why and how?<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 160<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

If you were concerned about yourself a bit
\nless, perhaps you would progress more. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>1 May 1937 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Would You tell me why I think about myself so much? I suppose
\nthere are people who don\u2019t think about themselves at all. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Such people are indeed very rare. Thinking
\nabout oneself is the most widespread habit among human beings. Only a yogi can
\nbecome free of it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>3 May 1937 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

If one didn\u2019t think about oneself, one would get carried away by
\nthe stream of life into the ocean of misery and suffering where almost everyone
\nis. It would not be good, one could never escape from the universe and reach
\nthe truth! <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

How fortunate that you are here to teach
\nme what to do \u2014 otherwise, no doubt I wouldn\u2019t know!!! <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>4 May 1937 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

When one does something for someone, is it necessary to identify
\noneself with that person? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

No, not necessarily; but it is difficult
\nto avoid receiving something of their influence. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>17 May 1937 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

If someone is teaching me, is it necessary for him to identify
\nhimself with me, to concentrate on me?<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 161<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Without concentration one can achieve
\nnothing. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 May 1937 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

X writes: \u201cPeople are advising me to take eggs and fish for
\nimproving my body. Please ask Mother if I can take fish.\u201d <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The doctor should decide about these
\nthings, if it is a matter of health.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI am attracted by Mother, but at the same time I must think of my
\nparents who have brought me up. I must pay back my debt to them.\u201d Please write
\nsomething about this last sentence. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I have nothing to say about it. Each one
\nhas to find his own direction. Once you have chosen to live for the Divine,
\nnothing else in the world should count; but so long as you have not taken the
\ndecision, you must find in yourself the direction you want to give to your
\nlife. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>26 May 1937 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nIsn\u2019t it true,
\nMother, that a son is not obliged to serve his father? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nOnly one who has
\ntotally consecrated himself to the Divine has the right to forsake his duty to
\nhis parents. <\/span><\/p>\n

\n 27 May 1937 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nI feel that I
\nam drifting further and further away from You. I also feel that I have become
\nduller, more insensitive, more ordinary. In calm I pray to you: show me the path
\nI must follow.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 162<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
<\/div>\n

\nTo discover one\u2019s
\nweaknesses and imperfections is already a great progress. The first step towards
\nprogress is a sincere humility. <\/span><\/p>\n

\n 25 June 1937 <\/span><\/i>
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nIs it really
\nnecessary to feel a great deal of sympathy for other people? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nNot necessarily.<\/span><\/p>\n

\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nI thought that
\na calm indifference was the best thing in many cases. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nYes, it is much
\nbetter. <\/span><\/p>\n

\n 28 June 1937 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nY spoke to me
\nunnecessarily. Is it good to give importance to these things? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nYou should not
\nattach any importance to them. But it would be even better not to listen. Gossip
\nis always harmful. <\/span><\/p>\n

\n 23 July 1937 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nThis morning I
\nfelt upset; perhaps a vital force came during my sleep. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nWhen you feel
\nupset, you should sit down in a quiet place and ask for peace until you feel
\nthat the disturbance has disappeared. <\/span><\/p>\n

\n 1 September 1937<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 163<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
<\/div>\n

\nMy present life
\nis undisciplined, although I think it is calm. Would You prefer it to be a bit
\nmore regular? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nYou must
\ndiscipline the physical consciousness from within, and from within also will
\ncome the outer order of your physical life. <\/span><\/p>\n

\n 8 September 1937<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nYou tell me to
\ndiscipline my physical consciousness from within, but I don\u2019t know what it is or
\nhow to do it. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nI mean that the
\nphysical consciousness must be disciplined by a force that acts from within.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n 11 September 1937<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nX has sent me a
\nletter from his friend, in which he speaks of doing yoga and taking refuge here.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nWe cannot take
\nanyone like this: <\/span><\/p>\n

\n            1.
\nWithout having full information about the person \u2014 name, family, state of
\nhealth, occupation, etc., etc. <\/span><\/p>\n

\n            2.
\nWithout having seen him. <\/span><\/p>\n

\n            3. And
\nin any case we will only take a person on trial at first, to find out whether he
\nis fit to do this yoga or not. <\/span><\/p>\n

\n            So the
\nfirst thing for this boy to do is to write us a letter in English giving us all
\nthe necessary details and also explaining his reasons for wanting to do yoga.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n            And he
\nshould also send his photograph. <\/span><\/p>\n

\n 7 October 1937 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nI ask Your
\nforgiveness for having kept up a certain familiarity with Y, although You told
\nme not to do so.  <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 164<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
<\/div>\n

\nO Mother, I
\nwant Your love! Without love how can I live? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nTo obtain the
\ndivine love, all other love must be abandoned. <\/span><\/p>\n

\n 28 December 1937 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nA head cold has
\nbeen trying to get into me for a long time already. Would You explain to me why
\nI haven\u2019t been able to resist this time? Is it a lessening of faith? <\/span><\/i>\n<\/p>\n

\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nNot necessarily.
\nThere may be other reasons too. Only control over the subconscious can give an
\ninvariable resistance to every attack. <\/span><\/p>\n

\n 25 January 1938 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nMy dear Mother,
\nplease give me Your blessings for this month of my birth.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n <\/span><\/p>\n

\nYes, my blessings
\nare with you. <\/span><\/p>\n

\n            And I
\nalso wanted to ask you something. You know that we are going to put up a new
\nbuilding,\u00b9 using the most modern methods. A great many workers are needed to
\nsupervise the work. I thought the time had come for you to take an active part
\nin the overall work. Of course this will imply regularity, steadiness and a
\ngreat sincerity. You would have to work eight hours a day regularly <\/i>
\nexcept Sundays. The architect, who is arriving from Japan in a few days, will
\ngive you all the instructions required for the work. Tell me what you think of
\nit, and whether I can put your name on the list of workers. <\/span><\/p>\n

\n                 1 February 1938
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\n\u00b9Golconde, a fifty-room residential
\nquarters.<\/font> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 165<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

I am happy with the work You have so graciously granted me. O
\nMother, let me feel Your presence constantly. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I am glad that the work pleases you. I am
\nsure that it will do you a lot of good to work; it increases the receptivity
\nconsiderably. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>10 February 1938<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I would like to talk to You about the work in general. A free
\nexchange of ideas and opinions between the man in charge and the supervisors;
\nnot a blind work, but a work of knowledge. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

What you speak of cannot be done in an
\narbitrary way, nor through any conversation; it demands a change of
\nconsciousness, and only yoga can bring about that change. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>6 March 1938 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Is there any harm in my talking with Y sometimes? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It all depends on the subject and length of
\nyour conversations. A few words in passing do not matter, but if you start
\ntalking about so-called spiritual things, then it becomes dangerous. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>14 April 1938<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Z found the shuttering perfect; he said it could not have been done
\nbetter. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Are you so sure? <\/span><\/p>\n

            <\/span>
\nIf you want to learn to work really well}, you must be modest, become aware of
\nyour imperfections and always maintain the will to progress.<\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 166<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

One does not progress through boasting. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>22 April 1938<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

The organisation is getting more and more complicated and I am more
\nand more anxious. I don\u2019t know where all these obstacles are coming from; up to
\nnow everything was going well. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Mr. Z wants a particular organisation; he
\nhimself has explained to me what he wants and I fully agree with him<\/i>. It is the resistance of egoism in certain
\npeople which is complicating the situation \u2014 otherwise everything would be very
\nsimple. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>30 April 1938 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

O Mother, why don\u2019t I feel Your presence? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is an excess of mental activity that
\nprevents you from feeling my presence. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>3 May 1938<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

One part of my being has started to think about X\u2019s faults. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I fear that in this you are under
\ninfluences that are none too healthy. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Another part says: \u201cWhy are you thinking ill of others? This is
\nwhat prevents you from feeling the divine presence.\u201d <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

This is absolutely correct. <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 167<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

O Mother, let me weep in the silence of my heart for union with
\nYou. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n


\n<\/font>
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

Enter into a strong and luminous peace<\/i>. It is there that you can best realise the
\nunion. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>6 May 1938<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Since yesterday things have gone wrong and I have lost my balance
\nagain. I don\u2019t understand anything about it. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Surely your vital has been thwarted in
\nsomething, and probably something unimportant since you don\u2019t even remember what
\nit is. You should not pay too much attention to these changing moods of the
\nvital which have no real value. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>9 May 1938 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, I would like to know whether I have reached the point of
\nbeing able to surrender in work. I don\u2019t think so. I am going to try to take an
\nattitude of complete obedience to the person in charge: whatever he says, must
\nbe done without any argument.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, this is good. If you do not obey, it
\nis you who become responsible for the slightest mistake; if on the other hand
\nyou scrupulously obey, the whole responsibility rests with the person who has
\ngiven the orders. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>10 May 1938 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, do You know that I am thinking all the time about the work
\n\u2014 which perhaps is not very good.<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 168<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

On the contrary, it is very good; it
\nteaches you to concentrate. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>12 May 1938 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

O Mother, I am really very far from You. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is because you are too dispersed \u2014 your
\nconsciousness rushes out into superficial external things instead of remaining
\nconcentrated. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>June 1938<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I have been feeling unhappy for some time; it seems that You have
\nwritten to someone about my faults and he is telling everybody. I don\u2019t
\nunderstand how this can help me. At the moment nothing interests me, and I feel
\nas if I am entering into the dark side of my nature. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It was Sri Aurobindo who wrote that we are
\naware of the \u201cserious failings\u201d in your
\nnature<\/i>. Did you by any chance imagine that you have none? If you were more
\nready to recognise them, we would have less need to refer to them. In any case I
\ntake the opportunity to tell you one thing: you certainly have possibilities,
\nwhich can become fine capacities if properly developed \u2014 but for the moment they
\nare no more than possibilities and it would be good to bear in mind that it will
\ntake a lot of time, effort and patience to change them into realisations. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>23 June 1938 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I feel that I am good for nothing, that I have no capacity to
\nlearn. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is a lack of practice rather than a lack
\nof capacity.  <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 169<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

How far I have strayed from You! <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Your vital is discontented because I have
\nnot given it the compliments it desired. But your psychic is always with me; it
\nis happy that I am making you conscious of what needs to be changed in you, and
\nit insists that I should do so in spite of the vital’s discontent. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>6 July 1938 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Sweet Mother, I will try to do whatever You wish. Where are You? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Cross beyond the ignorance of a mind that
\njudges without knowing, plunge into the depths of a calm and unassuming silence:
\nthere you will find me. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>29 August 1938 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

About the work \u2014 is it better to yield to fate, or to fight against
\ninjustice? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Before fighting you should be sure that you
\nknow where the injustice lies. And only the Divine can have that knowledge.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>2 September 1938 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

My dear Mother, would it be desirable to become intimate with Y? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

For sadhana, any intimacy is certainly
\nundesirable. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I would like You to tell me something about my sadhana. I need to
\nknow. <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 170<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

From the spiritual point of view it is not
\ngood always to be wanting to know whether what one is doing is good, whether one
\nhas made any progress, what point one has reached, etc., etc. It is yet another
\nopportunity to satisfy one\u2019s \u201cego\u201d by drawing attention to it. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>27 September 1938 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I spoke to Z about gossiping. It has made him greatly displeased
\nwith me and now he is cold towards me. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

There is always a way of saying things to
\npeople which does not offend them. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>18 January 1939 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Sweet Mother, please tell me why this room at Golconde, which is to
\nbe concreted on Tuesday, has taken so long to get ready. I must know my
\nmistakes. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The work is not going well because at
\nGolconde there is an atmosphere of discord and disagreement which prevents the
\nForce from working effectively. If each one made an effort to overcome his
\npreferences and dislikes, the work would go much better. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>22 January 1939 <\/span> <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Won\u2019t I be able to see You in the afternoon as before and
\ncommunicate with You any more? There are often things to ask You. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

When the outer contact is not possible, it
\nis time to cultivate and obtain the inner contact. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>25 April 1939<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 171<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Today is my birthday. I want this day to be the beginning of a more
\nspiritual life and therefore something has to be done. Please tell me what I
\nmust do. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is not with the mind that one should
\ndecide what has to be done. It should be a spontaneous movement taking place in
\na sincere and constant aspiration. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>22 May 1939 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, I see that mosquitoes are biting You in the evening during
\nmeditation. Would you allow me to drive them away with a fan? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

No, the movement of the fan would be even
\nmore bothersome than the mosquitoes. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>12 June 1939<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Let me enter into the solitude of my soul, O Mother Divine! <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Certainly this is the surest way to find
\nme. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>4 May 1940 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

As long as one relies on one\u2019s own judgment
\nof things, one is unable to discern and know the divine Will. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>13 July 1940<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

I am very surprised that people are giving You false reports of
\nthis kind; and it is really a pity that such things should happen just at the
\nbeginning of the work. I hope that You still have confidence in me. <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 172<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Reports never tell me anything; I never
\nbase my judgment on them. And what I hear from other people can never make me
\nlose confidence in anyone. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>9 January 1941 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, since I started mathematics I have been getting headaches
\noften. I need to go slowly and have to take two or three weeks for each lesson.
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

This is absolutely impossible. <\/i><\/span><\/p>\n

            <\/span>
\nSince the study of mathematics tires you, the best thing is to stop it. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>20 January 1941 <\/span> <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I have no mental tranquillity because I worry about my studies; I
\nfind arithmetic very difficult. I do not have that inner peace. I hope You will
\ntell me something about what I have just written. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You yourself asked to take up these
\nstudies. I do not see why you now complain about having no tranquillity. But if
\nyou feel that you are working too much, you can drop one thing or the other. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>8 March 1941 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Yes, I was wrong to ask You if I could start studying mathematics.
\nI want to go back to the attitude of doing only what You want me to do; eight
\nhours of work in the Building Service, that is Your will. Besides this work,
\nwhat would you like me to do? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It seems to me that apart from the work at
\nthe Building Service,  <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 173<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

if you feel like studying, it would be
\nbetter to read Sri Aurobindo\u2019s books seriously and carefully, without hurrying.
\nThis will help you more than anything else for your sadhana. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>9 March 1941 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Many people have told me to cut my long hair. What do You say? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n


\n<\/font>
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

It does not matter at all. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>14 October 1947 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

At the moment I feel very far from You. Our former relationship,
\nwhen I trusted You and You trusted me, no longer exists. I am full of desires
\nand only try to satisfy them. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Since you are aware of the state you are
\nin, it is time to take action and avoid the influences that estrange you from me
\nand make you unhappy. Nothing is lost if you take immediate action. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>23 October 1947 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, just now I feel full of despair and I cannot find Your
\nsupport. My mind is full of tension and it is making me ill. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Obviously it is enough to make anyone ill!\u2026<\/span><\/p>\n

            <\/span>
\nIt is not possible to serve two masters at once. You wanted to satisfy your ego
\nand its desires and you have moved away from your soul. Rediscover your soul and
\nyou will rediscover me \u2014 I have not changed place. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>7 November 1947 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 174<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

I do admit that I have moved away from my soul and that only there
\ncan I rediscover You. My purpose in writing all this was to ask for Your help in
\nrediscovering it.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

All my help will be in vain unless you
\nresolve to overcome your weaknesses. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>November 1947 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, could You give four rupees a month for the two of us, to
\nbuy some preserves or go to the cinema? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If I give you two rupees each, I can see no
\nvalid reason why I should not give every member of the Ashram two rupees
\npocket-money each month, and that makes a minimum of 1500 rupees (one thousand five hundred rupees per month<\/i>).
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

            <\/span>
\nNo further comment is needed. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>June 1948 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I would like to go to Bombay. It is not that I am unhappy here; on
\nthe contrary, I live too easy a life. I feel an imperative need to compare the
\nlife here with life outside. I need a change, and for this change to take place
\nI need to know the other life. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You may go if you like, but since I do not
\nsee how it can help you to overcome your lower being and go beyond the limits of
\nyour ego, do not expect any financial help from me in this affair. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>28 November 1948<\/span> <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

May I go to Madras to see the city and the surrounding area? My
\nsister lives there with her family. I will come back before Darshan. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 175<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

You may go if you like, but your family <\/i>must give you the money
\nneeded. Do not expect me to do it because I will give you nothing for that
\npurpose and I forbid you to ask money for it from any disciple or member of the
\nAshram, especially X. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>4 November 1949<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

C<\/span>OMMENTS
\n<\/span>O<\/span>N <\/span>P<\/span>RAYERS <\/span>A<\/span>ND <\/span>M<\/span>EDITATIONS<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

(The following letters regarding the Mother\u2019s Prayers and
\nMeditations are arranged according to the dates of the prayers concerned.)<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHow many times a day, still, I act without my action being
\nconsecrated to Thee.\u201d (2 November 1912) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Even after communion with the Divine, can one act without the
\naction being consecrated to the Divine? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Certainly, communion and consecration are
\nvery different things. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>8 November 1934<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

But is it possible to experience communion before consecration? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The part of the being that experiences
\ncommunion is not the same as the part that is not consecrated. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span>9 November 1934<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage \u2014 176<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\n

In this prayer You write, \u201cI am as yet far, no doubt very far,
\nfrom that identification in which I shall totally lose the notion of the \u2018I\u2019 \u201c,
\nand at the same time, \u201cand how many times already when I pronounce it (\u2018I\u2019), it
\nis Thou who speakest<\/span> in me, for I have lost the sense
\nof separativity<\/span>.\u201d (19 November 1912) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, is there a difference then between \u201closing the sense of separativity<\/span>\u201d and the \u201cidentification\u201d? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Losing the sense of separativity<\/span>
\nis the last step before the Identification, and in the Identification itself
\nthere are several steps. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>24 September 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

In the prayer of 26 November 1912 You say that You have \u201calmost
\nentirely lost the gross illusion of \u2018me\u2019 and \u2018mine\u2019.\u201d In the prayer of 3
\nDecember 1912 You say: \u201cin the measure in which my attitude allows Thee to act
\non me and in me, Thy omnipotence has no limits.\u201d <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Even after the identification, one\u2019s attitude does not allow the
\nDivine to act completely as He wishes! <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

There are degrees in everything, and what
\nis perfect one day no longer seems to be perfect the next. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>7 November 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cWhen it is needful that something should be known, one knows it,
\nand the more passive the mind to Thy illumination, the clearer and the more
\nadequate is its expression.\u201d (3 December 1912) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Mother, when is this possible? I often make mistakes; if I could
\nknow what is needful each time, it would be wonderful! <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 177<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

This can only happen when one has given up
\nall personal preferences. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>26 September 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cFor now I should not be able to repeat what was said.\u201d (3
\nDecember 1912) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Why does this happen? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Because memory belongs to the mind and it
\nwas not the mind speaking but a consciousness from beyond. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>28 September 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, we should not put too much intensity, too much effort into
\nour seeking for Thee; the effort and intensity become a veil in front of Thee;
\nwe must not desire to see Thee.\u201d (5 December 1912) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Is this true for everyone? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Certainly not. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>Besides,
\nas a general rule, you must never try to copy my experiences. I started to note
\nthem down after having attained communion
\nwith the Divine<\/i>, a state you are far from having achieved. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>October 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cI await, without haste, without inquietude<\/span>,
\nthe tearing of another veil, the Union made more complete. I know that the veil
\nis formed of a whole mass of small imperfections, of attachments without
\nnumber.\u201d (11 December 1912) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I think that the veil You mention here is the veil <\/span><\/i>between the Supreme and the obscure material world \u2014 but it has
\nnothing to do with You. <\/span><\/i>
\n
\n <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 178<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

In order to do my work, I have had to
\nidentify myself with the material world and its imperfections. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>6 November 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cAlready there is heard from behind the veil the wordless symphony
\nof gladness that reveals Thy sublime Presence.\u201d (11 December 1912) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Does this mean that there is a glad, wordless music that contains
\nYour sublime Presence? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Behind all appearances there is a harmony
\nof forces and movements which is something like the harmony of all the
\ndifferent kinds of instruments in a perfect symphony. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>30 July 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cI am endless Peace, shadowless<\/span> Light,
\nperfect Harmony, Certitude, Rest and Supreme Blessedness.\u201d (5 February 1913) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What does \u201cCertitude\u201d mean, in the spiritual sense? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Faith confirmed by the spiritual
\nexperience of what one has faith in. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>31 July 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cAll who seek Thee with ardour should understand that Thou art
\nthere whenever there is need of Thee; and if they could have the supreme faith
\nto give up seeking Thee, but rather to await Thee, at each moment putting
\nthemselves integrally at Thy service,
\n <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 179<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n


\nThou wouldst be
\nthere whenever there was need of Thee.\u201d (10 February 1913) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Is this not for me? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

This is for everyone \u2014 you as well as
\nothers \u2014 who is capable of taking this attitude with integral sincerity. But I
\nought to point out that it is even more difficult than making an effort. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>14 November 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd in this simplicity lies the greatest power, the power which
\nis least mixed and least gives rise to harmful reactions.\u201d (12 February 1913) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

So I suppose that this simplicity isn\u2019t good, since it contains a
\nlittle mixture? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Idiot! What can be without mixture in the
\nworld as it is now? Nothing, nothing, nothing! <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>August 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cThe power of the vital should be mistrusted, it is a tempter on
\nthe path of the work, and there is always a risk of falling into its trap, for
\nit gives you the taste of immediate results.\u201d (12 February 1913) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

So we should never trust the power of the vital? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

It is because we like immediate and
\nvisible results that we allow ourselves to be misled by the vital. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>August 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cAs soon as I have no longer any material responsibilities, all
\nthoughts about these things flee far away from me,
\n <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

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\nand I am solely and entirely occupied with Thee and Thy
\nservice.\u201d (11 May 1913) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Here I don\u2019t understand what You mean by \u201cwith Thy service\u201d, since
\nYou said before: \u201cAs soon as I have no longer any material responsibilities\u201d.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I wrote this because for a time I was not
\nliving at home, but with my mother, so I no longer had the responsibilities of
\nthe mistress of the house who has to see that everything is materially in
\norder. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>August 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cIt is by becoming conscious of Thy Will and identifying ours with
\nThine<\/span> that there is found the secret of true liberty
\nand all-puissance, the secret of the regeneration of forces and the
\ntransfiguration of the being.\u201d (11 May 1913) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t understand what \u201cthe secret of the regeneration of forces\u201d
\nmeans. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The material and vital forces are
\nperverted \u2014 they must be regenerated so that they become capable of expressing
\nthe divine will. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>August 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cTo turn towards Thee, unite with Thee, live in Thee and for Thee,
\nis supreme happiness, unmixed joy, immutable peace; it is to breathe infinity,
\nto soar in eternity, no longer feel one\u2019s limits, escape from time and space.
\nWhy do men flee from these boons as though they feared them?\u201d (18 June 1913) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Why don\u2019t men want to rise above the falsehood and ignorance that
\nreign everywhere in the world? <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

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Because they love falsehood, vital
\nagitation, violence, drama. The peace of eternity seems to them as empty as
\ndeath because they live exclusively in the mind and vital. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>29 January 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cThou art ourselves in our Reality.\u201d (15 August 1913) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Here I don\u2019t understand what \u201cour Reality\u201d means, because I
\nthought there was only one Reality. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I use the word reality in the sense of
\ntruth of the being. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>25 February 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cUndoubtedly, one must learn to control one\u2019s subconscient<\/span>
\njust as one controls one\u2019s conscious thought. There must be many ways of
\nachieving this.\u2026But there is surely something more rapidly effective.\u201d (25
\nNovember 1913) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What is this \u201cthing\u201d that can overcome the subconscient<\/span>?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The descent of the Supermind<\/span>.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>28 April 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cHow many different levels there are in consciousness! This word should
\nbe reserved for what is illumined in a being by Thy Presence, is identified
\nwith Thee and partakes of Thy absolute Consciousness.\u201d (13 March 1914) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I mean that the word consciousness should
\nbe reserved only for that which is conscious of the divine Presence. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>19 April 1935 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

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\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

\u201cOutside this state there are infinite grades of consciousness,
\ngoing right down to complete darkness, the veritable inconscience<\/span>
\nwhich may be a domain yet untouched by the light of Thy divine Love (but this
\nseems improbable in physical substance), or which is, for some kind of reason
\nof ignorance, outside our individual range of perception.\u201d (13 March 1914) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What is this \u201cveritable inconscience<\/span>\u201d
\nYou mention here? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The subconscient<\/span>
\nof the subconscient<\/span>. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>21 April 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cIn the presence of those who are integrally Thy servitors, those
\nwho have attained the perfect consciousness of Thy presence, I become aware
\nthat I am still far, very far from what I yearn to realise.\u201d (30 March 1914) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Are there any men on this earth who are already integrally Your
\nservitors? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I wrote this after meeting Sri Aurobindo<\/span> for the first time. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>18 July 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cMay my consciousness be identified with Thine<\/span>
\nso that Thou alone mayst<\/span> be the will acting through
\nthis fragile and transient instrument.\u201d (9 May 1914) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Why do You say \u201cthis fragile and transient instrument\u201d? Because it
\nwill really pass away one day? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The instrument in question here is on
\nearth, which has an ephemeral existence compared with the eternal
\nconsciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>1 June 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

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\n

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\u201cAnd on the earth now I am the joyful child who plays.\u201d (17 May
\n1914) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I think, Mother, that this \u201cI\u201d means You, so why not the feminine
\nform of the adjective? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

You ought to know the Hindu tradition that
\nthe world is the result of \u201cthe Divine Child who plays\u201d. It is with Him that I
\nwas identified. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>5 November 1934 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cAll the individual faculties slumber and the consciousness is not
\nyet fully awake in the transcendent states; that is, its wakefulness is then
\nintermittent and in between there is sleep.\u201d (19 May 1914) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Does this mean that before the consciousness has awakened in the
\ntranscendent states, there is a period in which the consciousness is asleep? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The consciousness is asleep in everyone
\nuntil it is awakened. <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

How long does the consciousness sleep like this? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

A second or an eternity. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>10 April 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Then what does this mean exactly? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

There are experiences of a universal order
\nwhich can be revealed only to those who have had them. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>13 April 1935 <\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThou hast made a promise, Thou hast sent into these  <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\nPage
\n\u2014 184<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

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\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

worlds those who can and that which can fulfil this promise.\u201d (14
\nJune 1914) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What do You mean by \u201cthat which\u201d? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The force, the power, the consciousness, the
\nknowledge, the love, etc., etc. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>7 April 1936<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cBut the religious being turns to Thee, O Lord, in a great
\naspiration of love, and implores Thy help.\u201d (24 June 1914) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What do You mean by \u201cthe religious being\u201d? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The being which has religious, devotional
\nfeelings. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>2 April 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>\u201cWhat wisdom is there in
\nwanting to be like this or like that?\u201d (25 June 1914) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What is the meaning of this passage? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

Wisdom lies in wanting what the Divine
\nwants, not in deciding for yourself. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>13 December 1933<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>\u201cO divine Force, supreme
\nIlluminator, hearken to our prayer, move not away from us, do not withdraw,
\nhelp us to fight.\u201d (8 July 1914) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Does the Divine ever move away or withdraw from us?<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

No, it is we who withdraw from him. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>11 July 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

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\n\u2014 185<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

Then what do You mean by \u201cmove not away from us, do not withdraw\u201d?
\n<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

I was not addressing the Divine himself,
\nbut a Force, an emanation of the Divine, which had come down to do a particular
\nwork on earth and could have withdrawn if it had seen that the work it came to
\ndo was impossible. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>13 July 1935<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cEarthly realisations easily take on a great importance in our
\neyes.\u201d (17 July 1914) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What do You mean by \u201cearthly realisations\u201d? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

The works that we do upon earth. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>30 January 1936 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cThe world is divided between two opposite forces struggling for
\nsupremacy, and both are equally against Thy law, O Lord.\u201d (9 September 1914) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What are these two forces? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

If you had read the meditation carefully
\nyou would not have needed to ask this question \u2014 the two forces are conservation <\/i>and destruction<\/i>. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>22 May 1935 <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cIt is in the cherry-blossom that lies the remedy for the
\ndisorders of the spring.\u201d (7 April 1917) <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

What does this mean? <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

There are certain illnesses that people
\nget particularly in Spring \u2014 boils, impurities of the blood, etc.\u2014 which the
\nJapanese cure with teas made from cherry-blossoms. I did not know this when I
\nhad the experience. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>11 February 1936<\/span><\/i> <\/span><\/p>\n

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\n\u2014 186<\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/table>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

SERIES ONE (1932-1949)    To a young disciple who joined the Sri Aurobindo Ashram in 1930 at the age of thirteen. After eight\u00a0 years of…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[119],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4243","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-17-more-answers-from-the-mother-volume-17","wpcat-119-id"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4243","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4243"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4243\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4243"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4243"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4243"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}