(In an attempt to bring the book distribution in line, Mother,<\/i>
on Satprem’s
\nsuggestion, asked a young teacher from the<\/i>
school to
\nbe in charge of the copyright department. Mother<\/i>
first
\nspeaks of this young teacher.)<\/i>
\n
He’s discovering skeletons! Poor M. [All India Press director], he was so upset!<\/p>\n
Naturally, for he isn’t the real culprit in all this, you know, it’s <\/i><\/p>\n
the other one behind, SABDA.<\/i><\/p>\n<\/p>\n
Oh, that’s….<\/p>\n
And that’s why he is hurt – because he’s more receptive. The<\/i><\/p>\n
other
\n one is penned up in his falsehood…<\/i><\/p>\n<\/p>\n
The other one is a NO! (Mother makes the gesture of something compact.)<\/i>
\n
Anyway….
\n
**<\/sup>* (Mother looks for something near her.)<\/i> I had something I wanted to show you … (Mother does not find it). <\/i>I don’t know, I thought I had kept some things for you, but I don’t know where they are now. You know, this (Mother sweeps a hand across her forehead)<\/i> is almost emptiness itself. There’s nothing here (forehead) <\/i>– nothing. When I am perfectly quiet and still (Mother raises a finger upward), <\/i>some things come (gesture above), <\/i>some things get done or straightened out – it takes place above. When I am like that, after a while a whole world of things gets done, gets organized, but it’s … (what can I say?) it’s another kind of reality, a more … substantial reality. How is it more substantial? I don’t know. Matter seems … unsubstantial compared to that. Unsubstantial, opaque, unreceptive. Whereas that is…. The funny part is that people think I am asleep! I don’t at all sleep. That’s how I spend my nights: a Force at work. And I am conscious … but it’s hard to put in words. Words are … words distort. Really a new kind of consciousness is developing – how will it express itself ? I have no idea. So people are convinced that I am asleep, that I am deaf, that … and on top of it all, I can barely speak (laughing) –<\/i> so I must have become an old…. I hardly belong to the old world anymore, so the old world says: she’s finished – I couldn’t care less!<\/p>\n Yes, I should think so!<\/i><\/p>\n I am telling you because I can tell you things. But it’s probably better this way. The trouble is, I am becoming an object of curiosity; that’s a problem because…. A host of people come flocking here just for that: an object of curiosity. But there’s this odd thing: for EVERYTHING, for everything I do – for instance, I still take my bath, I try to eat (it’s the most difficult – VERY difficult), for everything … (Mother stops short).<\/i> I wanted to tell you something, but it’s gone. Maybe it was not meant to be said.<\/p>\n Yes, you are obviously impelled by something else.<\/i><\/p>\n Yes, yes, that’s right. Exactly. So much so that sometimes, just after doing something, I wonder…. I suddenly ask myself, "Did you do this?" – and I’ve just done it! That’s how it is.<\/p>\n Yes, I quite understand. But when you act in that other, more <\/i><\/p>\n substantial matter, how does it find its way into this old matter<\/i><\/p>\n here? How is your organization up there communicated here?<\/i><\/p>\n<\/p>\n (silence)<\/i> I don’t know, there’s almost an interdiction to speak; because whenever I try to express something, I suddenly find myself before a blank.<\/p>\n Yes, I can understand why.<\/i><\/p>\n Page 248<\/font><\/p>\n Everything conspires to give the impression that I am falling apart.<\/p>\n Yes, but that doesn’t matter!<\/i><\/p>\n Provided somebody knows it to be untrue is what counts – YOU know.<\/p>\n But still, a good number of people here, though not knowing,<\/i><\/p>\n feel Oh?<\/p>\n More than you think.<\/i><\/p>\n Ah, the Force is tremendous, mon petit!<\/p>\n Those physically nearest to you are not necessarily those who feel it.<\/i><\/p>\n Yes, I know – because they just see this appearance, which is not so…. I tell you: I do things, and I don’t know how I do them. There’s a kind of…. Oh, but the most fascinating field of experience is food 11 am not hungry, I don’t feel like eating, food doesn’t interest me by any means, yet they bring me my meal, and I "have" to eat – sometimes I eat (always in small quantity), but since I don’t move and don’t work, I don’t need material energy, so I don’t need to eat much, and I don’t think I am losing weight (Mother touches her arms).<\/i><\/p>\n No, apparently not.<\/i><\/p>\n Apparently not, therefore….<\/p>\n But you aren’t heavy! [laughter]<\/i><\/p>\n Oh, I’ve never been heavy! But it’s truly interesting, because I don’t at all feel like eating, I am not interested in it, and yet something FORCES me to eat – not much, but it says, "Eat." The same with speech. Things are so clear, there is such a clear vision! (gesture above the head) <\/i>When I am silent and quiet for hours, SO MUCH work is being done, and everywhere at the same time (universal gesture)…. <\/i>But I can’t express it. This incapacity to speak is also rather special…. (long silence)<\/i> There are so many things I would like to tell you. But a kind of will bars me from speaking. So I….<\/p>\n Yes, I understand the danger of mentalizing things. I really<\/i><\/p>\n understand. Oh, but mon petit, the mind is gone.<\/p>\n No, I mean mentalizing by expressing things.<\/i><\/p>\n Yes, exactly. It distorts. We must be patient. This (Mother points to the garlands of "Patience" around her wrists)<\/i> is symbolic. Repeatedly it’s: patience, patience, patience. But the others, too, must be patient. And you, you must be very patient.<\/p>\n Yes, Mother.<\/i><\/p>\n Very patient – do you want my patience? (Mother slips her<\/i> garland around Satprem’s wrist). <\/i>And she too (to Sujata): <\/i>tell me, do you want my patience? (Mother gives another garland) <\/i>Here. (silence)<\/i> So what do you think could help you? Would you like some silence ? …<\/p>\n Oh, that’s….<\/i><\/p>\n … or would you rather ask me questions? (Mother plunges in)<\/i> Page 250<\/font><\/p>\n <\/b><\/p>\n <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" July 26, 1972 (In an attempt to bring the book distribution in line, Mother, on Satprem’s suggestion, asked a young teacher from the school to be in…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[140],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5678","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-13-volume-13","wpcat-140-id"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5678","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5678"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5678\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5678"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5678"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5678"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
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