{"id":588,"date":"2013-07-13T01:29:03","date_gmt":"2013-07-13T01:29:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/localhost\/?p=588"},"modified":"2013-07-13T01:29:03","modified_gmt":"2013-07-13T01:29:03","slug":"05-a-mothers-lament-vol-08-translations-volume-08","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/01-works-of-sri-aurobindo\/01-sabcl\/08-translations-volume-08\/05-a-mothers-lament-vol-08-translations-volume-08","title":{"rendered":"-05_A Mother’s Lament.htm"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\n
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\nA Mother\u2019s Lament*<\/font><\/span><\/b><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\n\u201cHadst<\/span> thou been never born, Rama<\/span>, my son,<\/span><\/p>\n

Born for my grief, I had not felt such pain, <\/span><\/p>\n

A childless woman. For the barren one <\/span><\/p>\n

Grief of the heart companions, only one, <\/span><\/p>\n

Complaining, \u2018I am barren\u2019; this she mourns, <\/span><\/p>\n

She has no cause for any deeper tears.<\/span><\/p>\n

But I am inexperienced in delight <\/span><\/p>\n

And never of my husband\u2019s masculine love <\/span><\/p>\n

Had pleasure, \u2014 still I lingered, still endured <\/span><\/p>\n

Hoping to be acquainted yet with joy. <\/span><\/p>\n

Therefore full many unlovely words that strove <\/span><\/p>\n

To break the suffering heart had I to hear <\/span><\/p>\n

From wives of my husband, I the Queen and highest, <\/span><\/p>\n

From lesser women. Ah, what greater pain <\/span><\/p>\n

Than this can women have who mourn on earth, <\/span><\/p>\n

Than this my grief and infinite lament ? <\/span><\/p>\n

O Rama<\/span>, even at thy side so much <\/span><\/p>\n

I have endured, and if thou goest<\/span> hence, <\/span><\/p>\n

Death is my certain prospect, death alone. <\/span><\/p>\n

Cruelly neglected, grievously oppressed <\/span><\/p>\n

I have lived slighted in my husband\u2019s house <\/span><\/p>\n

As though Kaikayie\u2019s<\/span> serving-woman, \u2014 nay,
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

A lesser thing than these. If any honours<\/span>,
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

If any follows me, even that man <\/span><\/p>\n

Hushes when he beholds Kaikayie\u2019s<\/span> son. <\/span><\/p>\n

How shall I in my misery endure <\/span><\/p>\n

That bitter mouth intolerable, bear <\/span><\/p>\n

Her ceaseless petulance. Oh, I have lived <\/span><\/p>\n

Seventeen years since thou wast<\/span> born, my
\nson, <\/span><\/p>\n

O Rama<\/span> seventeen long years have I lived, <\/span><\/p>\n

Wearily wishing for an end to grief;<\/span><\/p>\n

And now this mighty anguish without end! <\/span><\/p>\n

I have no strength to bear for ever pain;<\/span><\/p>\n

Nor this worn heart with suffering fatigued <\/span><\/p>\n

To satisfy the scorn of rivals yields
\n <\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/span><\/p>\n

* Ayodhya<\/span> Kanda, Sarga<\/span> 20, 36-55. <\/span><\/p>\n

Page
\n\u2013 7<\/span><\/p>\n

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\n

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More tears. Ah how shall I without thy face<\/span><\/p>\n

Miserably exist, without thy face,<\/span><\/p>\n

My moon of beauty, miserable days?<\/span><\/p>\n

Me wretched, who with fasts and weary toil<\/span><\/p>\n

And dedicated musings reared thee up,<\/span><\/p>\n

Vainly. Alas, the river\u2019s giant banks,<\/span><\/p>\n

How great they are! and yet when violent rain<\/span><\/p>\n

Has levelled<\/span> their tops with water, they
\ndescend<\/span><\/p>\n

In ruin, not like this heart which will not break.<\/span><\/p>\n

But I perceive death was not made for me,<\/span><\/p>\n

For me no room in those stupendous realms<\/span><\/p>\n

Has been discovered; since not even today<\/span><\/p>\n

As on a mourning hind the lion falls<\/span><\/p>\n

Death seizes me or to his thicket bears<\/span><\/p>\n

With his huge leap, \u2014 death ender of all pain.<\/span><\/p>\n

How livest<\/span> thou, O hard, O iron heart,<\/span><\/p>\n

Unbroken, O body, tortured by such grief,<\/span><\/p>\n

How sinkst<\/span> thou not all shattered to the
\nearth?<\/span><\/p>\n

Therefore I know death comes not called \u2014 he waits<\/span><\/p>\n

Inexorably his time. But this I mourn,<\/span><\/p>\n

My useless vows, gifts, offerings, self-control.<\/span><\/p>\n

And dire ascetic strenuousness perfected<\/span><\/p>\n

In passion for a son, \u2014 yet all like seed<\/span><\/p>\n

Fruitless and given to ungrateful soil.<\/span><\/p>\n

But if death came before his season, if one<\/span><\/p>\n

By anguish of unbearable heavy grief<\/span><\/p>\n

Naturally might win him, then today<\/span><\/p>\n

Would I have hurried to. his distant worlds<\/span><\/p>\n

Of thee deprived, O Rama<\/span>, O my son.<\/span><\/p>\n

Why should I vainly live without thine<\/span>
\neyes,<\/span><\/p>\n

Thou moonlight of my soul ? No, let me toil<\/span><\/p>\n

After thee to the savage woods where thou<\/span><\/p>\n

Must harbour<\/span>, I will trail these feeble
\nlimbs<\/span><\/p>\n

Behind thy steps slow<\/i> as the sick yearning dam<\/span><\/p>\n

That follows still her ravished young.\u201d Thus she<\/span><\/p>\n

Yearning upon her own beloved son; \u2014<\/span><\/p>\n

As over her offspring chained a centauress<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Impatient of her anguish deep, so wailed<\/span><\/p>\n

Cowshalya<\/span><\/span>; for her
\nheart with grief was loud.<\/span><\/p>\n

Page
\n\u2013 8<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/td>\n

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 <\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/table>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

  A Mother\u2019s Lament*   \u201cHadst thou been never born, Rama, my son, Born for my grief, I had not felt such pain, A childless…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[12],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-588","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-08-translations-volume-08","wpcat-12-id"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/588","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=588"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/588\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=588"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=588"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/worksofthemotherandsriaurobindo.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=588"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}