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Experiences and Visions
Spiritual experience means the contact with the Divine in oneself (or without, which comes to the same thing in that domain). And it is an experience identical everywhere in all countries, among all peoples and even in all ages. 18 February 1935 One must always be greater than one's experience.
It is always better to control an experience of this kind rather than to be controlled by it. I mean that the experience in itself is good and useful, but it must come when we want it to come and not at any time when it chooses to come. It seems to me that it is better to allow this experience to come only when you are quietly at home or during meditation. When you are at work it is always better to remain fully aware of your body and its actions.
The initial error was to hope to recommence the same experience as the one you had in your youth. In life, experiences are not repeated identically, and if they are not better, that is, higher and more true, they become necessarily worse. After a happy and favourable experience it is necessary to rise from the human to the divine, otherwise one risks falling into the infernal and diabolic. Page ― 55 It can be useful for a time to have certain inner experiences, but this attitude is not to be kept permanently as it is only a partial truth and far from the whole truth of the integral yoga.
The true revelation is the revelation of the Divine.
The descent of calm and light which you experience is a sign that the sadhana has actually begun in you; it shows that you are open now consciously to the Divine Force and its workings. The descent of calm and light into the being is the beginning of the foundation of the yoga. At first it may be felt in the mind and upper part only, but afterwards goes further down until it touches all the centres and is experienced in the whole body. At first it comes only for a moment or two; afterwards it lasts for longer periods. The other experiences show that the faculty of inner vision is opening; this is also a part of the yoga. The fire seen by you must have been the fire of aspiration lit in the vital being. The other things you saw are not definite enough to be interpreted. Continue your progress. Our blessings and protection are always with you. ¹ 11 March 1931
Last night after a little meditation when I was about to sleep, my body from the heart above was filled up by some energy. I did not do anything but just observed. It lasted for a few seconds only. Two or three times it has happened to me and on the previous occasions it lasted for some minutes.
¹Although written by the Mother, this letter may have been dictated by Sri Aurobindo. Page ― 56 I would like to know what this is. Is it an experience of Kundalini Shakti? What is the best attitude to be adopted when under such pressure?
The best attitude is to be quiet and calm, and to let the experience follow its course, observing it without thinking about it. Blessings. 4 July 1939 I have felt a sort of pain, especially in the chest, as reaction to the intense descent of the vibration-force, and I have had the impression that the body wanted to prevent it.
In order that the experience may not be dangerously deformed and painful, one should keep an absolute calm. It is only in the peace and the calm that the Divine Force expresses itself and acts.
You know that for many years I have been in the habit of leaving my physical body and making exploratory tours in my subtle body. [Here the sadhak describes various experiences.] I wonder whether I should keep up my practice of getting out of the body. It is extremely fascinating, but is it a necessary part of Yogic development for keeping the consciousness open to inner spiritual things?
It is much better to stop the experiences altogether. They seem to take you into levels which are undesirable and most unsafe; they are not at all necessary for any opening in the yoga. 28 March 1944 Page ― 57 (The sadhak wrote again, about the possibility of dying before turning entirely to Sri Aurobindo and the Mother, and related an experience in which a movement of total self-dedication went on.)
Certainly I have not given you up, not in the least. You are quite capable of the realisation if you make up your mind to it, and the experience you relate seems to me a valid promise that it will come. As for what I meant in my last letter it was simply that there were things which might act to delay your spiritual realisation and might be otherwise dangerous for you. This does not mean that the realisation will not come. 19 May 1944
You had the experience you describe when the force was acting chiefly in the mind, the vital and, through it, in the physical. It is long since this time has passed. The force has come farther down in its action and now it is at work not only in the material but also in the subconscient and even in the inconscient. Unless you follow this descending movement and allow the force to act in your body and these material regions of the consciousness, you find yourself stranded on the side of the road without being able to advance any further. And to allow this working of the force it is a detailed surrender of all movements, habits, tastes, preferences, sense of necessities, e. that is urgently required. Read carefully Sri Aurobindo's article in the Bulletin ¹: it will help you to understand. 20 November 1949 ¹ The Divine Body”, now published in Cent. Vol. 16, pp. 20-40. Page ― 58 Sometimes when I meditate, the body seems to vanish. I do not feel any kind of physical sensation, but at the same time I am conscious of everything around me. My consciousness remains only like an idea in the head. At times there is not a single thought in my mind; thoughts do come in it, but they just pass without creating any kind of confusion. This state is pleasant― like having rest. Mother, what exactly is this condition?
It is a withdrawal from the most external consciousness into the Purusha, the witness in the physical. One finds there a great repose, indeed.
One night I had a dream-experience, almost a waking vision. I saw two beings, whose faces I could not see, two tall and sturdily built persons, wearing what seemed to be heavy fur-coats (later I thought they might have been carrying a big load of herbs on their backs, as some light was gleaming out at times); they approached me and looked at me. I had no fear at all, but simply said, “If you have come from the Mother, you can do what you like; if not, I have nothing to do with you, whoever you may be. I firmly withdraw from your influence and you cannot touch one hair of mine.” With that, I quietly started taking your name and withdrew into myself, yet observed their actions. They talked awhile with each other. I suspected they smiled at my remarks. Then they drew something from behind their backs which showed as the light gleamed. But other details I could not follow clearly. Then they slowly left the room and I was fully awake. Page ― 59 Well, I am curious to know who they were, looking almost like twins riding on horse-back. In such cases what is the attitude to take? Obviously there should be no fear, but is there any particular way by which a sort of occult tact can be developed to discern the true nature of the embodied force or the being?
Your attitude was quite correct and the best one to have in the occurrence. They might have been the Aswins, the twin riders, the healers. 18 February 1952
If, while meditating in front of a flame, I think that it is the Divine and that it is within me, if I feel that the flame and I are one and the same thing the Divine, if I feel this always and for everything, will it be what you call “living within”? Unquestionably yes. It is an important step towards the psychic depths. 1969
Your observation is very crude. No rule can be laid down about suggestions and voices coming from “within”. Your “within” may mean anything. You must train your observation and try to distinguish between the sources from which the suggestions come. The voice or the suggestion may come from your own subconscient or it may come from something higher. If you know from where it comes, then you can decide whether you should follow it or not. Page ― 60 |