15 ­ 26 JULY 1919

Yoga Diary

July 15 ­ July 26

1919

Diary of Yoga. July 1919.

July 15^th  Tuesday.

Today is supposed to begin the finality of initial perfect gnosis in the highest logistic ideality by the firm beginning of T². This is due for fulfilment in the second half of July. The two first chatusthayas are at the same time to begin their higher and fuller perfection,—they have already the fundamental perfection in samata, the fundamental completeness. K.A is to confirm its continuity and intensity and be a basis for the regular working of the other Anandas. Karma is to develop its already developing action, Krishna Kali to deepen and possess the system, Ananda Brahman to fill in with the Ishwara. The other siddhis are still uncertain of development, but the fight with the obstacles of arogya is to continue with a necessary result of advance in the tapas of Arogya. Practically all the siddhis are ready or almost ready for advance except the two most difficult parts of the Sharira and the outward Karma.

After a little difficulty the transformation of T² to the ideality has begun finally. The action of the intuitive mentality continues, but accompanying it there is an ideal action which gives sometimes a decisive, sometimes a limited and therefore relative certitude, sometimes in conjunction with the lower movement a mixed decisive and relative certainty or a mixed incertitude and certitude. This is especially in the T² of circumstance.  

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The trikaldrishti after perfecting itself in an universalised type in the intuitive mentality of a character of intuitive inspiration is now definitely transforming T² to the intuitional gnosis of the character of intuitivised revelation. This is attended with some fresh disturbance of the intellectual stuff, but that as soon as it comes is changed or replaced by the higher forms of thought and perception. Tapas is now of the same nature as the trikaldrishti.

The first chatusthaya is already being given its higher perfection. The positive ananda of equality is taking up all the adverse movements and reactions.

Vishaya is again renewed with strong gandha and taste of perfume. These two vishayas may now be considered established, however small the present range of their action.

Strong struggle with the roga difficulty. The pain in the side tried to prolong its continuity and represent itself as the sign of some organic ailment, but immediately disappeared every time ideal tapas was applied. Pain in response to pressure in this part of the body persisted, but has also disappeared suddenly. Throughout there is evidence of increasing force of arogya tapas, but it is not yet able to eliminate the roga with a decisive beginning of finality

July 16^th  Wednesday

Today is to be a hollow between two waves; there is a siege of the system by the external mind armed with all that has been cast out; but this comes now no longer in the shape of the old intellectual mind, but a semi-idealised intuivity translating into mental and physical terms all the rejected suggestions of the partial ideality which supports the lower order of things, drawing from a perversion of ideal intuitions their justification. For everything in the lower order has its justification in a truth of gnosis expressing something in the Infinite.

Kamananda, which was allowed a little to lapse yesterday, is after some difficulty of mechanical lowering and attempted discontinuity—attended by an emptiness of the gross body and retirement into the subtle physicality,—renewing its selfconfirmation. The old habit of relapse is not yet excluded even in this first siddhi of the physical system. It is restored to a slightly  

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obstructed continuity, but has not full possession of the physical system.

There is a strong attempt to restore asamata attended by a great violence of suggestion of raga and dwesha; it is not supported by the Purusha or the personal Prakriti, but has been able to produce asamata in the outward physical mentality. These things are still possible because of the persistence of intuitive mentality in the stuff of the physical consciousness; that can only be secure against mental suggestions by a partial personal siddhi cut off from the external Nature or by complete idealisation.

July 17^th  Thursday.

The ideality has resumed its work; it is taking up into the mixed intuitional form of ideality, mixed by the presence of mindstuff with its limiting suggestions, the truth-reflecting intuitivity and itself is being taken up by the highest logistis. The inspirational intuivity suggested by the external mind remains as an obstacle, but is, when it comes, attacked and half transformed by the gnosis. Its power is in all those things that have not yet in the Abhyasa been assumed by the highest logistic gnosis

The obstacle now is the sluggishness of the old mentality unlifted by the inspired intuitivity which mixes with and keeps down the gnosis. This is the old action of the mixed intuitional ideality then strong and luminous, now unconvincing and void of force. Only the highest gnosis can continue the sadhana. The depressed lowness of the system has given occasion for another and furious attack of the environing intellectual powers, with a forced physically mental asamata in outworks of the system, vibrations not belonging to the system, but imposed from outside, also asraddha not in the Ishwara, but in the siddhi of the ideality. This has been expelled by a resort to rudra tapas of rajasic anger in the Shakti. Both the relapse and this resort have been recently predicted in the trik. and the lipi, the latter almost daily in an insistent lipi. The result has been unexpectedly a momentarily complete conversion of the physical mentality into the ideal form[,] the very siddhi obstinately obstructed for the last several days.

K.A. like every other siddhi has been depressed by the general  

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obstruction. It is now reviving though with some incertitude.

There is some tendency of recovery in the swapna Samadhi which has for some time relapsed almost entirely into nidra.

All the rest of the day a recovered action of the ideality.

July 18^th  Friday.

The ideality is again taking up the whole thought and T², this time with a greater force of universality, but it is in the intuitional ideality and not the highest gnosis. The system is now almost settled in the intuitional ideality, though occasionally the old intuitive being breaks in or surges out from suppression and takes temporary possession. This is whenever the gnosis has been for some time inactive.

The siege of Roga continues, but chiefly in the subtle physicality: the effects on the dense body are occasional, sometimes strong, but thrown out by the tapas after a short struggle. Only in the two still chronic ailments is there as yet a permanently successful obstruction; but in the centrality the effective pressure of Arogya-tapas increases with a sort of slow, but always perceptible steadiness.

Chitra is showing some tendency to greater stability, but as yet only in the indirect vision. The fugitive forms have more firmness in their incidence. There is no improvement in the character of the forms or the range of the rupa.

After some dark nidra strong ideal action in the Samadhi. Finally the highest ideality took final possession of the perception, speech, lipi and to a certain extent of the T². In deeper and deepest nidra also ideality was exceedingly strong, but with some persistence of the dream character and occasional incoherence. Nevertheless coherence in the lipi even here was stronger than before. Rupa etc are now taking on the character of actuality, though as yet only of the pranic (astral)¹ reproduction of immediate things experienced in life. The presentation was accurate, entirely stable, steady in reproduction of continued action, though here with some interruptions and resumptions; combined

¹ In the manuscript, the closing parenthesis follows "reproduction".—Ed.  

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scene not always complete, but with strong presentation of the central object and action, the accessories being left in a shadowy suggestion. The rupas however were no longer chhayamaya of the underworld, but tejomaya of the pranic world, with great but an unearthly vividness, beauty and force of life. Massed rupas of the same character appeared in light samadhi on the borders of antardarshi, but with a less heavy fullness and not actual, but rupas of possible things, and not stable, but also not entirely fugitive. Thought, judgment, interpretation maintained a coherent ideality even in the depths of nidra. A much greater character of normality in the whole samadhi.

Vishaya (physical) in jagrat antardarshi attained in touch to a great plenty; all the subtle results, suggestions, sensations of sparsha, except the actual sthula incidence. This too occurred freely, but only in habitual rupas. It is noticeable however that nothing came which had not previously been gained in past years by sadhana, only they came with a greater force, frequency and intensity. In swapna there is now more frequent and forceful sparsha. Sravana is obstructed both in antardarshi and full jagrat; it is rare even in swapna.

An attempt at a higher Thought confined to the centre of the thought above the head and a withdrawal of that which forms in the brain region of the subtle mind or is occupied with penetration to this region. This was the normal gravitation because here the thought assumed a satisfaction of present living actuality, while above it had a higher, but remoter less physically satisfying quality. The attempt to take up T² there failed initially and there was a brief relapse to the mass of possibilities and incertitudes, but all this is now taken up by a fiery thought, ideal of the pragmatic nature. This T² is telepathic, but correct except for certain confusions contributed by an understrain of intuitive suggestions which are for the most taken up and half-justified, half-corrected immediately or with a little difficulty. The centre thought now predominates and gathers round it at its own level all other thinking, but sometimes descends to give its own character to thought manifested in the lower levels or regions of the subtle body.

At night renewed action of coherence and ideality in the dream state.  

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July 19^th  Saturday

Rf. [Reference] "Which I must act, briefness and fortune, work", of the approaching application to life of the ideal knowledge, power and guidance.

In the morning some retardation; inaction of ideality broken by a slight partial and a recurrent larger action. No definite progress in any direction.

Samadhi; at first full ideality, nidra conquered; coherence and strong gnosis in all the activity, but not all kinds in equal power. Afterwards some force of nidra, but not complete, the action always of the ideal kind. No prominent actuality.

In the afternoon T². All actual T² of an ideal intuitional kind, well-established, normal, satisfying in its limits, but subject to narrow limitations. Then a double movement first to extend to all possible trikaldrishtic and tapasic suggestion, at the same time to lift up to a higher gnosis. This was interrupted by a taking up of the suggestions of the pranic and mental world sometimes without, sometimes with a reference to their origin in the logistic gnosis. This brought finally into the solid intuitional ideality all these possibilities given their proper place, so far as that could be done in this kind of perception,—but the proper eye for them is the inspirational seeing,—got the right actuality of the may bes, might-be, may have been, mighthave-beens, may-yet-bes, and even the relative certitudes of their will-bes, often but not always realised, with a certain initial decisive certitude of selection. The higher thought now coming for the T² will be inspirational gnosis. It is already beginning in the intuitional form or taking up the intuition. These movements had been made before on a lower scale and were often taken for the full and final siddhi: but this is of a greater, fuller, final kind in the real ideality standing on an idealised substance of the whole conscious being.

Subsequently the inspired thought began to take the place of the intuitional gnosis and take up into it the T². Much more might have been done on the intuitional basis, but this would have been a lesser siddhi and was not the intention of the will of the Ishwara, which is already giving presages of the ascent beyond logistic to the second stair of gnosis, when once the supreme logistis shall have been formulated in its relative entirety.  

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Health stronger again in resistance to cold exposure. The central arogya fluctuates, but is on the whole growing steadily but slowly in an initial preparatory force. There is no improvement in the digestive insufficiency, but rather a constant fluctuation and even a relapse in the symptoms of the one definite ailment. Continuity of K.A also fluctuates, though it is fixed in a recurrent continuity and the obstruction cannot resist the smarana.

At night incoherent dream and nidra.

July 20^th  Sunday.

Script in accordance with intuitional ideality suggested day before yesterday the following possibilities for the rest of July.

(1) T² sure; initial perfection only. [T² is already sure but the initial perfection depends on the final normality of the highest logistis.]²

(2) Samadhi sure; fixity, ideality; nidra initially overcome, but at night active. [Samadhi, made sure this morning, in ideality and fixity; nidra is very initially overcome, except at night when it reigns and repels all certain forward movement.]

(3) Vishaya and jagrat rupa to get over their old difficulty [No sure sign of this siddhi; a slight improvement is all that is visible.]

(4) Ananda, fixed in recurrence of continuity. Also initial conquest of oblivion—except for sleep and samadhi (perhaps), the only difficulties. [There is already fixity of recurrent continuity and an unfixed recurrent intensity; oblivion has been overcome once or twice in initial type; but for some time there has been an indulged habit of oblivion in absence of will and smarana]

(5) Health; battle, supremacy of tapas, but not the perfect arogya. [The battle continues. Tapas is already in a way supreme, except in the two rogas; in one of them it is frequently effective more as ishita than as aishwarya or vashita; in the other it is for the time sometimes effective, sometimes ineffective. There are also some fragments of former rogas which very occasionally recur and resist tapas.]

² This and the five sets of square brackets that follow are Sri Aurobindo's. The closing bracket in item 3 and opening bracket in item 5 have been supplied editorially.—Ed.  

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(6) Saundarya in bhava. [Youth in bhava is growing, but bhava of saundarya apart from the youth-light is still uncertain. Physical youth and saundarya make no progress.]

(7) Utthapana still in difficulties.

In Samadhi in the morning perfect reign of ideality. All the forms of experience are beginning to develop in the ideality. Lipi was except for one or two instances coherent and significant, or sometimes significant in a lilamaya incoherence, even in frequent sentences set in fugitive masses. Dialogue, enacted story, some narrative. Steady action and stable rupa in abundance. Only vishaya absent. But the final beginning of assured samadhi progress is founded. Only jagrat rupa and vishaya are still subject to the old unconquerably obstinate obstruction.

In the sluggish states of the system, except at night, inertia, passivity, blankness whether of tamas or of shama is becoming the exception. An activity of [ ]³ the intellectual ideality, that is, the low pitched intuitional gnosis which supports the mental world of possibility, is then the rule. When the sadhana tapas is active, inspired ideality begins to resume its work of taking up the whole consciousness; sometimes an inspired intuitional, sometimes an inspirational logistis works on the thought and to a less degree on the tapas. It is only at a high pitch that tapas and trikaldrishti join in an assured ideal equality or oneness.

The inspired ideality is giving a more frequent decisive certitude of trikaldrishti in T² and the inspired intuition for the first time a quite perfect selection of succession of detailed circumstance in time; but these things have still to be universalised. The uninspired intuition is now being cast out of the action; since it is no longer necessary in the process of the taking up of the intuition by the inspired logistis.

K.A is being restored to constant intensity, pervasion, slightly interrupted continuity by the sadhana tapas. The thick recurrent masses of tamas of oblivion in the physical being are being attacked and dissipated, spontaneous recurrence enforced, sahaituka

³ MS of  

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Ananda brought into occasional activity. The mental tamas masses of oblivion, while writing etc are also being attacked, dissipated, set aside or illumined by light of ideality. The work, it is said, will be confirmed today (thought) and completed in three days (lipi). The difference of Ananda in the postures is still marked. Sitting it is capable of a great initial intensity and force of continuity; today greater and more exciting to the whole system than before. Reclining, it is capable of a great intensity, but often impure of the unidealised kind, especially when there is samadhi and nidra. Walking it is intense with difficulty, more liable to decided interruption or reduction to a minimum. Standing it is still less intense except at moments, especially if there is other occupation. These defects are now being attacked. Insistent intensity has been introduced into the standing attitude, recurrent when reading; it is being insisted on in the walking. In reclining the ananda is being purified and idealised: it is being enforced in Samadhi.

Samadhi, late in the morning. Ideal lipi, scene etc. As the rupa becomes pranic instead of chhayamaya, visions of things never seen nor suggested by the seen arrive. Today, an eagle carrying a lamb to its nest and there beginning to devour it, half dead; nest, eagle, lamb very vivid, but pranamaya, as in a living picture of the Indian type, not quite the earthly bhava of the forms, nor the earthly lines, in spite of the bodily type and species being the same. This heralds the liberation of the rupa.

Ananda in samadhi constant in lighter depths, spontaneously recurrent in deeper swapna, but interrupted by nidra in the deepest swapna. The ananda tends to draw the mind back to the body, but then there occurs often a phenomenon which is now growing, the double or triple samadhi, in which the outside world is experienced accurately in an outer consciousness of sleep, by the sukshma and not the sthula indriya. The inner consciousness remains in swapna, a deeper is in sushupti of some kind, for the most part swapnamaya sushupti. Sometimes the outer world is experienced by the subtle sense with a fringe of waking physical sense. At times there is a division of the consciousness between the outer physical and the inner dream mind, the latter withdrawn into swapna and sleep, the  

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former still aware physically on the outskirts of outer sound, touch or experience.

The replacement of the idealised, intuitional intellectuality by the inspired intuitional or intuitional inspired for the telepathy is proceeding very rapidly, but is not yet absolutely complete. Meanwhile the higher trikaldrishti acts only by intervention in the mass of rapid and crowding ideal telepathies. Now the process of including the inspired intuition has begun and is proceeding with a great initial rapidity.

The higher level of the thought and T² is now (in the afternoon) beginning suddenly to rise to the revelatory inspired and inspired revelatory logistis. This is necessary in order that the inspired and intuitional inspired may take entirely the place of the intuitional thinking as the lower level of the thought process. This lower level represents the substitute for the former intellectually intuitive thought and uncertain telepathic perception, the thought of the possibility. The higher level rises towards the certitudes and more and more, as it rises in the scale, commands them in its light and power

Drishya of the panchabhuta, mass and karma, the pranic ether and some of its elementary incidents, wind, rain etc is now recommencing. This brings in three of the long suspended vishayas. The other vishayas are coming forward, but with no widening range. Sravana is the most difficult, because the physical ear is beset by physical sounds in the daytime and cannot easily distinguish the slighter subtle sonances.

Sadhara rupa also is returning, fine crude, often perfect, but without stability. This has brought in an outburst of the finer prakashamaya niradhara rupas in a variety, groups, persons, objects, animals, scenes, some clear, others confused, none stable, except a solitary one or two: but there is already a hint of a tendency towards stability. Of the three gunas, variety, perfection, stability, the first long resisted may possibly now be on the point of bursting the barrier. It is to be noted that lipi in the morning declared that today would be the turning point in jagrat rupa and vishaya; this lipi has been repeated with a firmer asseveration. This may be the beginning in the rupa; but as yet there is no appearance of fulfilment in the vishaya. All the material crude forms have now manifested in  

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this finer crude niradhara,—prakasha, chhaya, tejas, jyotir, agni and varnamaya forms. Subsequently some union of stability and relative perfection began to be developed in a still greater but confused and irregular variety. The higher forms occurred hardly at all and then without stability.

In Samadhi much pressure of Nidra, but the ideal samadhi persevered and kept itself in progress as an overtone. Rupas of the manasa loka, bright and tejomaya, but with a brief stability. Dream was immediately converted into symbol of ideality; incoherence of lipi into a crookedness of pointed significance.

In the lapse of the tapas the intuitional ideal mind reappeared for a while, but always with the inspired gnosis hovering over it to take it up and transform it into its own character. As yet the morning's hint of rapidity is not fulfilled, it was so understood at the time that there might be some delay. The inspiration holds the field.

K.A also lost for a time its continuity and intensity. It is now recovering, but at this time between 12 and 3 it tends to some deidealisation and conversion into perverse negative electricity and has to be restored on the resumption of the normal activity. This has been done today with rapidity.

The conversion has begun of T² into the revelatory logistic ideality. At first this is attended with some intuitive revelatory action incased in the old intellectual doubt, but this is to be changed into the inspired logistic revelation. The certitude is already immensely increased, but it is not till all is changed to the terms of this drishti that there can be an initial perfection of accuracy in the T². The drishti reveals the decisive truth of each movement, whether it be a possibility of self-effecting force or a relative, temporary or decisive finality of effectuation. This is the last movement within the ideal logistis.

The revelatory even in the intuition gives the circumstances with a [constant]⁴ accuracy, but this is attended with much incertitude owing to the external intuitive intellectuality which darts in its suggestions and to a certain distrust and anxiety about the possible

⁴ MS constance  

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error of the result in the old judging mind. The element of revelatory judgment does not with sufficient prominence accompany the revelatory seeing of tapas or intention of action. Nevertheless, when left to itself this intuitive revelation can judge and fix accurately enough possibility and finality, even though it is not so forcible and conclusive as the inspired or the full revelation. This is with regard to succession of circumstance. This logistis acts as yet only partly in judgment of time, very uncertainly in relation to space and direction; but sometimes it takes them up all three and combines them with sufficient or complete fullness of accuracy. All this is in the field of exercise. Teledrishti is not yet being exercised in this higher action.

The lipi is still logistic, but a higher than the logistic ideality is entering into it attended by a diviner splendour of light and blaze of fiery effulgence. This may be called the hermetic gnosis. Its essence is cruti or divine inspiration, as the essence of logistis is smriti, divine mnemosyne. One remembers at a second remove the knowledge secret in the being but lost by the mind in the oblivion of the ignorance, the other divines at a first remove a greater power of that knowledge. One resembles the reason, is a divine reason, the other is [of] the nature of prophesis or inspired interpretation.

Sparsha is now abundant in the three things formerly gained by the sadhana, touch of subtle water and fire, touch of light things, eg insects, thread, wind,—both of these strong, vivid, materialised, effective on the physical body, and other touches not materialised, but having a certain physical result of sensation; subtle in intent, sthula in result, but not with the full density. Some of these sparshas are however on the verge of materialisation. All this action was formerly regarded as an inferior insufficiency by the intellectual impatience, but is now accepted as a stage towards the full sparsha. The old drishya of the pranic ether is also resuming its plenty. The c̣ravana seems to be awaiting the silence of the night for its manifestation; but the sthula hearing is becoming exceedingly acute and comprehensive and there is a hint of sukshma sound behind its abundance. The lipi is to this extent justified, but there is as yet no sign of new extension, without which the barrier of obstruction cannot be said to have fallen.  

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Sadhara and niradhara are developing with some rapidity: in the midst of much confused, shapeless or half-shaped rupa there are some of perfect or almost [perfect vividness,]⁵ completeness and distinctness; old types of rupa are coming back with a greater perfection and vividness, but they have the old fault of instantaneous instability. Nevertheless this is a definite advance. At night there is the old difficulty; there is then the greatest confusion, vagueness, crudity; but there is also a beginning of better things.

Some isolated cravanas of the old type.

The revelatory ideality is taking up the consciousness, even the revived suggestions of the external intuitive mentality, but this involves a momentary retardation in the decisive trikaldrishti-tapas.

The yogic c̣ravanas in the closed ear, strong while they lasted, but not persistent as in the former sadhana. Some c̣ravana speech. But there is as yet no enlargement of the c̣ravana

Nidra at night, but also samadhi. The coherence is now firmly established and enforces itself with great power. Stability in the chhayamaya rupa. The samadhi is fixed in the ideality. All has now to be developed, the physical obstruction which denies samadhi overcome, nidra to be replaced by samadhi.

July 21^st  Monday

Today, a full play of the ideality, but not all of the highest logistis. Highest logistis to attain to a partial universality. Increase of chitra and vishaya. Increase of Ananda. More attention to the physical siddhi.

Ideality is now acting in masses, but of all kinds, from the idealised intuitivity to the highest logistic, but the last is pressing on all for transmutation. The fluctuation of Ananda and the struggle in the Arogya continue. K.A idealised in the highest logistis is beginning to act and to press upon the intuitional and mental forms of the ananda.

Great intensity of gandha and gandha-rasa, combined and allied, but not yet the free variety. Great intensity of rasa, the crude turning to firm developed and to suggested perfect rasas.

⁵ MS perfectness  

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The obstruction to freer frequency and variety has now alone to be broken for the perfection of this siddhi.

Farther Sadhana in the morning discontinued through pressure of work. This is a defect which the consciousness has not yet overcome, owing to deficiency of the multiple concentration.

Immense development of the samadhi. Only towards the end some lapse into nidra. Inexhaustible abundance of rupa, especially of the mental plane, but also of the pranic and chhayamaya, scenes of all kinds, figures, action, lipi, dialogue etc: for the most part a high ideal level. The chhayamaya scenes now attain to an absolute stability, frequent though not invariable; the others have only a first stability. There is also stability of successive action, but there were only one or two unsuccessful attempts at combination with stability of scene. Only once a fugitive touch of the incoherent dream consciousness attempting to bring in a terrestrial association of memory and confuse with it the accuracy of the recorded impressions. A little more development will securely found the whole base of swapna samadhi. K.A in samadhi, interrupted occasionally by an intervening cloud of nidra power between the physical and the higher mental consciousness, but afterwards more persistently by a deepening towards nidra; but after the brief sleep there was an immediate recovery of the Ananda. It is now noticeable that when the Ananda occupies the brain there is no oblivion; when it pervades the rest of the body, but not the head, oblivion becomes possible.

Work in the afternoon.

Rasa acts now with some frequency, though without an entire freedom. Definite rasas are coming with increasing ease and variety. Gandha is for the present obstructed. An old siddhi, sparsha at a distance, sukshma or sukshma-sthula in incidence, felt by the subtle body and conveyed by it in the same moment to the physical sense: there is however no division, it is felt as one touch by the united sukshma and sthula sense. Rupa has developed a few instances outside of the crude of a stability still within the primary stability, but in its highest degree. Variety of rupas at night is on the increase, crude of all the kinds, jyotir etc, and dense of the crude, dense and developed degrees, but few as yet are complete,  

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except certain unstable forms and some stable crude rupas. There is a hint too of developed rupas; but not the actuality, except in some fugitive incomplete formations. Rare instances of c̣ravana of a new kind. Attempts at jagrat sukshma speech, not yet articulate or fully audible. Thunder in the ears. The old persistent, unceasing loud cricket sound in the room, once rejected as a physical sound, is again heard, and is now clearly marked as sukshma. The thunder in the ears is followed by a great intensification of the physical hearing.

K.A is now very often stable in the head. Then even a low intensity of ananda turns to constant sensibility.

The idealised intuitivity is allowed sometimes to act, but is now the truth-reflecting intuitivity; there is no predominance of the pragmatic or mechanical mentality. These only recur in a dull fragmentary fashion.

[July]⁶ 22^d  Tuesday.

The higher hermetic gnosis is now showing itself in the revelatory logistis not only in the lipi, but in thought-speech and perception; something of it is evident in trikaldrishti and Tapas, even when these act through the idealised intuivity; this action no longer disturbs to any great extent by a premature anticipation of the future actuality or possibility and falsification of the present actuality. That was formerly the result of a higher power suggesting its greater possibilities to the lower plane. The purification of the lower plane makes it a clearer channel and prevents this consequence. In the tapas there is some hint of a possible omnipotence of the gnosis which will remove the obstacles of the existing law of the body

Yesterday there was a violent attack of roga trying to materialise itself in digestive disturbance leading to nausea. This was cast out by the tapas after some fifteen minutes or more; it left a slight transient residue, followed by a strong health state. This morning the attack was of the diarrhoeic tendency, with all its concomitants of jalamaya, agnimaya, vayumaya disturbance. The revelatory tapas was applied to correct the sanskaras of the bodily

⁶ MS June  

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mind and very rapidly the attack was overcome without its ordinary reaction of constipation. Some slight recurrent residue of tendency remains, but not enough to trouble the system. There is a great increase of tapas supremacy in the dealing with roga. If it can be extended to the digestive perversion and the central weakness, the Arogya will have its first complete basis.

In the morning physical tamas, some relapse into the old intuivity. This is now being corrected, but it is noticeable that the obstruction is being concentrated in the physical system. Opposition in the objective subjectivity is half-hearted; the opposition has lost faith and self-confidence.

The remnants of the habit of intellectual judgment and recipiency are now being raised and extruded from the system; the ideality is to be its own recipient, its own critic, questioner, judge, authority.

Samadhi in the later part of the morning. Perfect freedom of rupa, variety, perfection, vividness, but only in initial or primary stability in the pranic world. Chhaya only comes in usually as a shade on some of the pranic rupas; most are free from chhaya. Incoherence in the lipi is at once turned to coherence or proved to be a coherence. Antardarshi rupa is being prepared in the light swapna, on the borders of the two states and in some cases in antardarshi itself there are scenes and figures of a pranic kind, not crude, but ghana.

Rasa is now frequent in masses, sometimes persistent; obstruction hardly exists for its action. Gandha gains in force, but is prevented by the obstruction from frequency.

The incidence of the relapse into the intuitive intellectuality has been very obstinate and severe, a great confusion created, almost all the old incidents of relapse suggested, even something like the old hardly idealised intellectual intuivity revived in fragments and in the mental atmosphere. The orderly and powerful development of the gnosis has undergone momentarily a strong interruption. Nevertheless lipi after some fluctuations has greatly increased in force of revelatory light and the breadth of its flood and luminous force; thought speech has also grown in inspired revelatory power. The T² has been most afflicted and with it the thought perception  

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obstructed or brought to the lower level of intuition. At present all perception is of the intuitive ideal level with a touch or pressure of revelation tending to rise into the intuitive or inspired revelatory logistis, attended often by cloggings of intuitive matter or deviating into some kind of imperfect inspiration. The intuitive mentality itself has been so strongly idealised in its struggle with the gnosis that it is difficult sometimes to distinguish between this heavily idealised intuivity and the real intuitive or inspirational gnosis at its lower levels of force, light or certitude.

Dream at night of an extraordinary coherence, free for the most part from present association, except in the later nidra, and almost on the point of conversion to ideal experience of past, future or otherwhere happenings. In samadhi some incoherence and a lower level of general force of the ideality, but no cessation of abundance. This incoherence tends to turn into a more prolonged and sustained perfection of dialogue, narrative, lipi etc.

K.A afflicted, but not discontinued in its recurrence. Some attempt at enlargement of drishya and vishaya generally, as of rupa, but very uncertain and infirm though tending to largeness. Persistence of attack of roga and replying tapas. Generally an embarrassed but still successful progress, preparing a greater siddhi.

July 23^d  Wednesday

A day of partial recovery and advance.

T² is acting with a quieter, deliberately limited and restrained action. Correct in the intuivity of the gnosis, although embarrassed by a strong adhesion of stuff of uncertain mental intuivity, the inspirational form is still overpowered by the latter disability, gives only the tendencies, pressures of force, suggestions of coming possibility. Intuitive certitude is slowly but steadily enlarging its operation.

K.A after some difficulty has recovered its basic continuity, but thinly without the opulent incidence and pervasion. Steady in act, variable in incidence, but afflicted by oblivion of absorption, only the thought not going out to objects, interferes less with it than the concentration on act or object, but this too now causes oblivion when attention is required to the thought-process. At the same time there is a progressive force of recovery.  

1142

Premananda in the Vishwadarshana has for some days been insisting on its normality. Ahaituka mental darshana is the chief obstacle; it is shantimaya with suppressed prema or anandamaya with diminished prema. This mental sight is disappearing before the premamaya vision into the vijnana or chidghana saguna seeing. In proportion as the guna was not seen, there was deficiency of prema; in the prema itself the mentality would thrust a diminishing incompletive suggestion of sterile ahaituka. Vijnana darshana does not suppress, but can hold a non-insistent diminished prema. Prema increases the ananda in the vijnana; ananda increases prema. Brahma-vision seeing things as objects of the unifying cognizance tends to be without prema; Purusha Brahma or Ishwara brahma darshana brings the deeper unity, prema and ananda.

K.A has recovered its force, but is still easily depressed by the interruption of the mind's absorptions, because there is a pressure on it from the obstructing force which compels it to sink easily in a mechanical variation of intensity, fluctuation and occasional cessation of its overt presence. But now the memory always brings back the Ananda.

In Samadhi continuous narrative, monologue, dialogue or their combination in the ideal form. This was done largely and for long in lighter swapna, on its borders or partly in concentrated antardarshi and partly in swapna. There is no long continuity of it in the deeper swapna which is still a thing of many, swift and brief experiences, thoughts and visions. K. Ananda maintained in lighter swapna, brought in with difficulty at a greater depth, non-existent in deep nidra. Exceedingly strong and violent varied gandha. Rasa is recurrent, but not with such persistent freedom as yesterday, but it is developing more distinct rasas.

Throughout the day there has been a strong persistence of the relics of the intuitive mentality and the intuitive ideality has not been effective in getting rid of the obsession; because it is no longer the chosen instrumentation. Now the inspirational ideality is taking up the work, with the highest logistis at its back. This is more effective, all is at once changed to the inspirational form. But this too is not absolutely effective. The highest logistis alone can do the work.  

1143

There is a beginning of the change of the physical consciousness to the inspirational ideality.

Free gandha in the evening; the obstruction seems to be broken down, though not either in gandha or rasa entirely destroyed. It is intact in c̣ravana and sparsha.

Samadhi fluctuating between full ideality and a lower half ideality. Memory in waking is badly deficient; this is itself an obstacle to rapid progress. Great masses of printed lipi, largely incoherent, but much more fluently legible and stable than at any previous time. Stability of rupa and scene and of all other experience is beginning to move towards farther self-extension. Narrative attempted in deep swapna, but trailed off into incoherence. All this is in the adverse state of the mentality.

Ideality still hampered and obstructed in the system.

July 24^th  Thursday

A farther advance and complete recovery today.

The siddhi is now moving towards a system of complete affirmation; all thought and perception, no matter what the source or medium, is admitted as having some kind of justification in force and being and the exact nature of the justification is being immediately assigned and made as precise as possible. In this process intuitive mental thought is allowed, but idealised in the mentality, since so only can it get its proper proportions. This has always been the theory of the sadhana; it has been preparing and repeatedly insisted on for a long time, but only now by this removal of the too trenchant intellectual distinction between satyam and asatyam is it becoming entirely possible. This completion is necessary for the manifestation of the hermetic gnosis; the logistic is a limiting gnosis, the hermetic an entirely comprehensive ideality. T² cannot be perfect, but only relatively perfect in the logistic gnosis.

Gandha and rasa are now acting with a considerable freedom and variety and the former with a fundamental perfection. Rasa is still subject to its initial crudeness of incomplete massed tastes, though there are now definite and perfect rasas. Rasa is now insisting on perfection.  

1144

In Samadhi a great flood and mass of experiences of all kinds, but incoherent, yet all in the ideality. Subsequently an ordered movement. All the intuitive mind turned into ideality, what was before simple intellectuality, is now just before the ideal level and is changing to the intuivity. This movement represents a complete mutation of the whole being into the gnostic type. Even the physical being is beginning this mutation. Forecast in the samadhi, this change is also beginning in the jagrat condition.

Sparsha has now a greater freedom and variety of the more subtle touches. Half-sthula sukshma sparsha also comes more often and with greater force, but not without some difficulty and obstruction.

The K.A violently oppressed; but the mechanical discontinuity cannot maintain itself any longer when there is smarana, except for a while after long discontinuity by oblivion. There is only strong suppression of intensity reaching the verge of discontinuity. The intensity recurs whenever there is laxity of the oppression.

The movement is now to the complete idealisation of the whole being. But the system is still low and the intuitive mentality recurs persistently and has to be idealised into the full logistis. This is especially due to the recurrent imperfection of T² and to the continuance of old states in the physical being.

Friday. July 25.

Yesterday's recovery was not complete except for a temporary movement. The new siddhi is still invaded by the external intuitivity, though there is no complete relapse. The ideality moves on the level of a thickly illumined revelatory intuition. This is extending greatly a relatively certain trikaldrishti and taking up firmly some, rejecting others of the telepathic suggestions which are again coming from the intuitive externality. The siddhi of T² is only initial; much has to be done before it can acquire a settled universality.

K.A at first distressed to the extreme point near discontinuity. Now it has revived, though not in full force and has again begun to push away the oblivion of absorption. Other siddhis have been in abeyance during the morning.  

1145

Samadhi in relapse.  Afternoon spent in work.  K.A in fluctuation. In ideality T² slowly enlarges itself in the ideal intuition. Some accommodation of this power in the thought with an incomplete inspirational ideality to form anew an intuitive inspiration. All these things are movements of recovery and enlargement of ideality on the lower levels, not permanent form or the regular action of the gnosis.

Samadhi recovers some of its force, but there is a strong persistence of incoherence, especially in the lipi. The siege of the external intuitivity continues. As yet the system is not ready for the full renewed action and control by the highest revelatory gnosis. Some attempt at shabda (vakya).

July 26 Saturday

Highest ideality has now a greater force in the thought perception, but T² continues on the lower intuitive level, is mainly telepathic and draws down the rest of the thought towards its own present type of action. Tapas is increasing its Kali force and largeness of action.

There is now a struggle between two kinds of ideality, the old ideality which depends upon the existent actuality, illumines it, goes a little beyond it but from it, returns to it, acquiesces temporarily in its decisions, and a new greater pragmatic ideality which takes the present actuality as a passing [circumstance],⁷ claims to go altogether beyond it, to create with a certain large freedom according to the Will and looks even beyond to the omnipotence of the Self and its will, [to] determine as well as see the future. It is over the relapse to the mentalised intuitive ideality that the question is being fought out, for it is the mental intuitivity and the intuitive ideality which illumines it into a lower gnosis which either temporarily support or resignedly acquiesce in the relapse as a part of the still existent law of the rhythm of the sadhana. The greater ideality aims at eliminating the rhythm of rapid progression and sudden relapse. It proposes to do everything from above, by the ideality, in the ideality, the gnosis working out itself, âtmani âtmânam âtmanâ.

⁷ MS circumstances  

1146

The future of the sadhana lies with this greater pragmatic ideality and with something beyond it in the hermetic ideality. But it is still undetermined how soon it will be able to transcend the obstructing power of the intuitive mentality and act in its own right of rapid creation or revelation. The physical siddhi, the full force of Samadhi, rupa, vishaya, the greater T² seem to be waiting for this consummation